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Reception starters.....ulp! <wibble> thread.

(66 Posts)
hazeyjane Sun 31-Aug-14 09:05:25

Only a few days here, ds starts Weds. I am starting to feel very nervous.

How is everyone doing?

Anyone fancy a handhold over the next few days?

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore Sun 31-Aug-14 12:52:38

hazey ds2 is actually going into Yr1, however, he is quite far behind in many aspects - due to what is believed to be dyslexia and a visual memory problem, plus struggling with sensory stuff. After the SENCO was off for over a month last year, and the replacement didn't bother to even return my calls, I'm now going to have to go in guns blazing this term and hope the proper SENCO is back on duty and get some things in place.

I don't look forward to it. I feel like it's always a battle. But I'm so very nervous about how ds2 is going to handle Yr1. There is a particular little girl in his class that seems to delight in saying rude things to him, because he literally explodes every time, and I'm struggling with how best to deal with it.

At least he's keen to go back to school.. half the battle I suppose.

Is your ds excited and looking forward to it at all?

Housesoftheholy Sun 31-Aug-14 13:18:15

Hi hazey and Alice, I could really do with a handhold!

Ds starts ss on Wednesday and I'm really nervous. I'm confident in my choice of school but I am just worried how he will cope away from home and me. He's been out of pre school since the beginning of the year and we are never really apart.

For personal circumstances as well it will be nearly as big change for me too. I do desperately need a break, but I will miss him too.

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore Sun 31-Aug-14 13:51:15

Houses is he looking forward to it? I've been trying to be "unavailable" to the dcs a bit more during the day (cleaning, doing paperwork, and so on), so they're reliant on me being Right There all day. Sort of a separation in the house a little. Otherwise, ds2 would literally sit on my lap or next to me ALL DAY or demand that I play with him ALL DAY and follow me every time I left the room. Trying like crazy to make him feel more independent (even though sometimes I don't want to sad).

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore Sun 31-Aug-14 13:51:36

sorry, so they're NOT reliant on me being Right There all day.

fairgame Sun 31-Aug-14 14:03:43

Mine's not going into reception but he is starting at an out of county ss on wednesday. I'm very anxious about it. It's a long taxi ride for him and he hates change so i'm not sure he will cope very well for the first couple of months.

houses is yours boarding or going as a day pupil?

Housesoftheholy Sun 31-Aug-14 15:34:24

That's a good idea Alice to make them less reliant. We've been doing what we normally do but I have been using a countdown calendar, and a school morning schedule every morning so he's at least used to that part.

He pulls an excited face when you say about school on Wednesday but I don't think he really understands and he tends to just copy the face I pull when I've been talking to him.

fairgame ds will be day pupil it's only about 15 mins up the road. But I will put him on the school transport from day one as I think it will be less confusing for him. How old is your ds and How does he seem about the move?

fairgame Sun 31-Aug-14 16:16:06

He's 9 so going into year 5. He's got an hour of travelling in a taxi with an escort.
He was really anxious when the summer hols started but he hasn't spoken about it for a few weeks. He hates change so i can't see it going smoothly. He really show excitement so i'm not sure how he's feeling at the moment. I asked him earlier and he shrugged. Chances are he will just explode on wednesday morning. I am quite prepared that i may have to take him myself, in his pyjama's, manhandling him out at the other end!

Housesoftheholy Sun 31-Aug-14 16:38:22

Its a long day with a long journey either end too, I can understand why you are anxious about it. I am fully expecting ds to come home an absolute horror because he's over tired and overstimulated, I may be wrong but I doubt it.

AliceDoesntLiveHereAnymore Sun 31-Aug-14 16:53:25

hazey how is your little one doing? Is he worried about it? Or is it more you worried? (I mean that in a non-offensive way - I suspect I worry about some things MUCH more than the dcs do)

hazeyjane Sun 31-Aug-14 17:30:19


I have a book for ds which I made with photos of the school, his ta, his school uniform etc. When we look at it he signs school and seems happy, then he will point to me, and I say 'Oh Silly, Hazeyboy, mummies aren't allowed at school' and he laughs, and then signs the name of his 1-1 from preschool, and I say, 'Oh Silly, XXXXX doesn't go to big school' and ds puts the book away.....I don't know if this bodes well.

I am nervous, because it took such a long time to get him settled at preschool with me attending with him for 3 terms. I know he has made so much progress, and he is much less clingy than he was (he was practically attached to me constantly until preschool), but I think it is going to be a struggle at first.

The unit is good, but there are somethings I am worrying about which i know I will have to keep my eye on. I think when it gets to transfer to juniors we will probably be looking at special school, but I won't think about that at the moment!

I am also panicking about the practicalities of the first day,
1) getting ds into his uniform, which will be a battle
2) getting ds to leave the house
3) handing ds to his 1-1
4) dealing with all the above with his older sisters in tow, as they don't go back to school until the day after!

I just can't believe that my little boy, who in some ways seems like such a baby, still in nappies, no speech (apart from his first word spoken this week - 'yeah!') who gets tired so quickly and struggles to even sit sometimes, will be going off to school. BUT he has made so much progress being at preschool, and he is so loved by his school friends that, despite the butterflies in my stomach, I am sure it will be ok.

Good to have some handholding on the journey!

JJXM Sun 31-Aug-14 20:21:52

My DS is also starting ss on Wednesday. DS only has three words and is also still in nappies. The thing I'm most worried about is the lack of control - I won't be there to help smooth any things over. He's going on escorted transport and so I won't be there to help him into school and make sure his bags go in. What if he refuses to eat anything all day! I'm so used to anticipating his needs that I worry how he will manage without me.

coppertop Sun 31-Aug-14 20:47:35

I don't have a Reception starter this year but just wanted to wish you all the best of luck.

Ds2 is moving into secondary so I'm busy wibbling too. smile

ConstantCraving Sun 31-Aug-14 21:10:38

I'm having a major wobble and should probably get a grip... DD (4.5) and with an assumed ASD (on waiting list for diagnosis) starts reception on thurs and I feel physically sick thinking about it. She did ok at nursery with lots of support but goes into reception with no statement and no extra help. School are aware of the potential diagnosis but having seen her on transition days have clearly decided she is fine and I'm an over anxious mum. She is high functioning and has 'coped' well for the hour or two's worth of transition - but they don't see the anxiety afterwards, the nonsensical babble (she seems to lose the power of speech when tired) and the meltdowns. She is on a bread only diet, uses pull ups to poo, and won't talk to her peers. She just looks so lost sometimes in social situations - and she hates noise, How will she cope in a class of 30 confident boisterous 4 and 5 year olds?
Wibble, wibble sad

Housesoftheholy Sun 31-Aug-14 21:11:14

Hazey and JJXM are your dc starting full time or part time?

Hazey I'm worried about getting ds in his uniform too. We have practiced wearing it over the summer lots but he started out wearing all of it and now will often only put on the t shirt or trousers, not both. We also have a photo book that the school made him with talking pages so it talks him through the photos and he's loved looking at it. I've seen on your posts before how attached to his 1-1 your ds was too so it will be a big transition for him.

JJXM I'm also worried about not being able to help ds and tell someone when I know he is trying to communicate something in his behaviour. They asked me to fill out a detailed book about things they need to know about his behaviour, communication etc so I really shouldn't worry too much but I've done everything on my own for so long it's hard to let go!

Good luck coppertop too for secondary smile

PolterGoose Sun 31-Aug-14 21:19:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

salondon Mon 01-Sep-14 04:48:15

I am right there with you all. My daughter doesn't have the concept of 'next week' etc. And she has been to this school in the nursery year with the same support. So, a lot of things are same for her. But a few things are different too.
1. - 9-3. I know for a fact she will be tired by 1:30. We have worked hard on dropping her afternoon nap. But she still likes to have a little downtime. I hope they will allow her access to the sensory room
2. Lunch times - she has eaten in her day care for years. But school dining halls are a different ball game. I have been offering her food kept in thermos flask. I don't know if she will get a plate there or not.
3. 'Working' in the busy environment for 6 hours. She has been having 6 hour long aba sessions to 'train' her. But home is home. School is different.
4. The U shaped toilet seat. We have completely desensitised her over summer. She uses it at home. But again, home is home. School toilets are scary for her as it is.
5. The whole aba tutors in school saga. Keeps winding me up

I never expected to be so nervous when she goes to school. I always told myself I am used to having her in the day care for the whole day. But here I am. Total wreck.

Thanks for this thread. Big hugs all

Sahkoora Mon 01-Sep-14 07:55:01

Also wibbling here! DS is 6 but had a disastrous start in ms. Got him into a fab ss but he's been home almost 10 months and while I NEED a break (gone grey this year) I'm so scared this isn't "answer" everyone thinks it will be.

He seems keen on his uniform but had a hideous time getting him school shoes. Had to get some rather bright Spiderman shoes in the end so am hoping school will tolerate them for a few weeks at least.

Another major wibble is that he's starting on Thurs and we STILL don't know anything about transport. He's got a place but the firm hasn't sorted out routes, lists or escorts yet so no hope of him meeting anyone beforehand. If he gets on the bus on the first day it will be a miracle.

I'm also 33 weeks pregnant so i've also got hormones to contend with! ARRRGH! Best of luck to you all xxx

hazeyjane Mon 01-Sep-14 08:16:36

I know it is considered un mumsnetty, but huge great big hugs to everyone whose dcs are starting this week (older and younger!).

I can barely drink my coffee I have so many butterflies in my stomach.

The uniform thing is going to be a big hurdle here, ds won't even consider trying it on, I have stamped his name and a pirate skull and crossbones in it, chopped out all labels, showed him photos of his friend in his uniform...nada).

Ds going until 11 for the first 2 weeks, then lunch for 2 weeks, then we have a meeting about how he is getting on and then possibly doing a couple of full days (morning in resource base, afternoon in ms with 1-1). Lunches are going to be tricky because he has the same thing for lunch every day (not sure pork pies tick the healthy lunch box policy!) and won't eat fruit (only snack allowed). He has it written into his statement that he has a 1-1 at lunchtime to help him eat and drink, and we are going to try 1 school dinner a week.

I feel bad because my dds (7 and 8) are back on Weds and I have barely given it a thought.

Throw into the mix that ds is my 3rd and last, and I am wobbly mess of emotion!

Firsttimer7259 Mon 01-Sep-14 10:53:58

Hi, We are 2 weeks ahead of you all as schools in Scotland started mid-august. Just to say DD is loving her SN school. She is pretty used to the general schedule as she was doing pretty much the same at SN nursery for the last year. So its erally just an extra half day on top. Ive found the biggest wobble was seeing all the NTchildren starting school - DD still such a baby comparatively, made my heart ache.
I hope your wee'uns take to it as well as DD has. And hope your schools are supportive and gentle with all of the differnt needs our children have. Big hugs to everyone.

hazeyjane Mon 01-Sep-14 11:44:18

Wow, FirstTimer, so glad to hear about your girl. It seems a long time ago that we were on our handholding threadsmile

Have had a lovely video from ds's portage worker to wish him luck, and a call from his OT to see how he is doing. <sob>

JJXM Mon 01-Sep-14 14:22:01

Houses - DS is going full time straight away. He's going to a specialist hf autism school and there are only six children in his class plus the teacher and two TAs. As all the children have ASD they are more flexible about food and uniform to begin with.

DS seems to be okay with the uniform - we've talked in excited voices about it and let him pick his own school shoes. We bought a small chest of drawers and called it his school uniform drawers and will put a couple of hooks next to it for his book bag. I'm more worried that he won't eat!

Sakhoora - we only found out about transport timings last week and we are lucky in that three other children in our village were in the taxi last year so it's simple to add DS to that. I would phone your council and nag them.

MooMummyMoo Mon 01-Sep-14 15:39:26

My DD starts in reception at SS on Thursday. Looking forward to it and worrying about it in equal measure! It feels a bit like she is going in blind as they haven't requested any info re her communication etc and as she is non-verbal currently I don't know if they'll see what she is trying to communicate. She had a one to one at mainstream preschool so I knew someone would be with her, helping her, all the time. But it doesn't work like that at SS so feel a bit unsure I suppose. I just hope she doesn't get left sad

On a practical note, I got my transport confirmed at the end of last week. It's suddenly occurred to me that I might need to provide a car seat - is that right? I will call them to check when they open again tomorrow morning but just interested in the meantime if people know how it usually works?

fairgame Mon 01-Sep-14 16:40:23

moomummy they usually have their own booster seats but it might be worth a call just in case they haven't thought of that!

coppertop Mon 01-Sep-14 18:37:35

They usually provide the car seats for you. I had a call last year to check to see if my ds still needed one.

Great to see that your dd is getting on so well Firsttimer. smile

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