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I'm finding it all too much again - need more hand holding x

(14 Posts)
bjkmummy Mon 10-Mar-14 16:14:17

It's the little things that knock the stuffing out of you. Had the LA response now for a few days. Was okay with it as nothing of any substance in it. It made some comment about her previous school screening her for dyslexia at my request. This wasn't true, school did it then told me. Although I took her out of the school, I thought we had a good relationship as they were fantastic over her brother.

I emailed the head (DH encouraged me to do it!) and said it has been said it was my request but I was unaware until the class teacher spoke to me.

Head has responded saying that concerns were raised by me? To class teacher on our door step chats! Head screens any child with concerns so daughter sent through by class teacher. Test revealed she was at low risk of dyslexia so she wasn't put forward for full testing as felt needs could be met at the school. Daughter 6 months after leaving the school would be dx with severe dyslexia so clear the screening is not a true reflection on if a child could be dyslexic - so okay can argue that point back but what's upset me is that my email to her and her response has been copied in to the LA so totally stabbed in the back by the head.

I've spoken to her dyslexia teacher who today has done reading and spelling tests with her and is also going to write a report on her for me for the tribunal so I'm slightly worried what they will reveal. If she's improved guess I can argue that's down to the specialist teaching as before it she had made no progress. But then also aware progress adds weight to LA argument.

Then to complete my day the class teacher just phoned me and dropped in about my daughter having a full week of assessments at the end of month - no doubt the result will be conviently handed to the LA in time for the next deadline but I will get them after the deadline.

I'm just starting to feel just under so much pressure over it and don't know if I can do this - ive been so ill for the last 4 days as well which hasn't helped. She's got a salt assessment on Saturday and OT assessment on Monday. No idea what they will or won't show so its all such a big pressure cooker and we have no one at all on our side but everyone against us.

PolterGoose Mon 10-Mar-14 16:28:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ineedmorepatience Mon 10-Mar-14 16:29:33

I have pm'ed you because I dont want to out myself smile

ouryve Mon 10-Mar-14 16:34:31

Are the assessments normal end of term jobbies?

bjkmummy Mon 10-Mar-14 16:49:19

im guessing so ouryve - teacher already been constantly saying what amazing progress she is making so we can guess where this heading...

Levi174517 Mon 10-Mar-14 17:40:05

<offers a hand too> and a [HONK]

I really admire your strength and drive when everyone you deal with is being so, so difficult.

Not sure what to say but couldn't ignore; people on this board are behind you.

Stay strong you are in the right! thanks

bjkmummy Mon 10-Mar-14 18:25:19

on a plus side - dyslexia teacher said tests today showed she scored below average in everything except comprehension which shows her difficulties are not due to low intelligence so obviously something else is causing a barrier to her learning

ouryve Mon 10-Mar-14 18:54:18

This is what you need to do. Focus on your DD, stick to the facts and try to stay out of the politics, no matter how hard they try to drag you in. You still got 6 weeks of this, haven't you? That's quite a long slog.

Skylar123 Mon 10-Mar-14 19:27:50

Your strength is admirable wine
Keep focused, concentrate on your end goal.

AgnesDiPesto Mon 10-Mar-14 20:47:24

Top tip take a few days off completely. No emails, no MN (even other peoples problems are a reminder), just chill. In a few days you will come back to it stronger and ready to kick a** again. But right now you need a break. They will concoct a narrative. You have yours. The tribunal will have to decide which is the truth.
I had chronic jaw problems leading up to tribunal - the pressure was so intense I was clenching my jaw in my sleep, by the day of tribunal I couldn't open my jaw to eat a sandwich without my jaw cracking!
I kept going until I fell off the edge of a cliff. Over time you get better at seeing the cliff coming and taking steps to avoid it. That's what you need to do now.
I promise you having a break even for 1-2 days will mean you come back with a clear head and much more able to cut through the crap.

bjkmummy Mon 10-Mar-14 21:03:52

thanks agnes - good advice - after tonight I will keep the computer turned off - ive got to serve my form on the tribunal and LA which I will get ready tonight and then post them both tomorrow and then its done and I can forget about it for a couple of days

ouryve Mon 10-Mar-14 21:24:42

Tomorrow would be a nice day for coffee and cake, somewhere, after you've posted the forms.

bjkmummy Mon 10-Mar-14 21:28:54

indeed! although on weds I have been invited for coffee with the lovely LA!! its a transition event for my elder son - that should be fun :-) will have dh with me as well but these things have to be done and I aint scared to show my face when it comes to my children. they will either be lovely or not but at least I get free coffee :-) and its in a lovely posh hotel in town as well

ouryve Mon 10-Mar-14 22:40:37

A face off, at their expense, is always worth attending grin

I'm sure you can successfully carry off so polite it makes their pants itchy.

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