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How do you deal with this?

(51 Posts)
lougle Sun 25-Aug-13 21:20:25

DD2 (no diagnosis - school convinced NT. I'm certain she's not) is now 6.

She went to Nanny and Grandad's yesterday, did cooking with Grandad. We all came to eat her cooking for tea. She wanted a sleepover and was granted one. She had a lovely time. Slept well, watched telly in bed with Nanny and Grandad, helped Grandad make breakfast. Nanny took her to the swings, etc.

I was cooking a Sunday Roast for us all at our house. They arrived and DD2 was very happy. Her mood in general deteriorated and she was starting to be quite stroppy.

Then, she got really tearful. DH had set the dinner table and placed DD2 next to Nanny. She didn't want to be next to Nanny. Once she starts, she can't let it go. DH is also not great at flexibility. She got really upset and insistent that she couldn't possibly sit next to Nanny. I was in the kitchen so unaware of it.

She tried to rein it in, but when I asked her what the problem was she started crying and said 'I can't tell you.' I said that she must tell me. She then said 'But it's about your parents and I don't want you to be cross.' We talked and I pointed out all the lovely things Nanny had done with her.

Nanny was upset, although being very understanding, but I was cross.


At the dinner table DD2 got really loud about no-one sitting next to her. I had moved DM from next to her, to next to me. I explained that as she had made a fuss, I'd moved Nanny, so that's why no-one was sitting next to her.

She started yelling that no-one loved her. I said 'I love you, but you've hurt Nanny and I think you need to do something.' She said 'Sorry? I need to say sorry? But that won't make it ok hmm.'

She's right. But she can't see that it would be a start.

How do you explain that sometimes you just do something because it's the right thing to do?

lougle Tue 27-Aug-13 18:24:11

We've put LfT on hold for the summer so that she can focus on getting some physical confidence - Gymnastics summer club and some swimming sessions. She was reluctant to do anything 'schooly' so I felt a break was best.

Thanks for that, Kleinzeit.

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