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does your child hold it togther at school but not at home/out

(51 Posts)
OMGGG Sat 13-Jul-13 22:41:30

im interested to find out how many children dx with ASD are able to hold themselves together at school for whatever reason but then show different behaviours at home etc.
my child (hfa) is apparently showing no signs at school pointing to asd apart from a little help required with making friends and task changing. other than that school saying he is fine.
he doesnt melt down at school like at home.
how can this be?
paed says that autism expresses itself in all settings so if he is not displaying signs at school then he doesnt have autism.

BiddyPop Tue 16-Jul-13 12:50:27

DD has issues at school, but generally manages to hold it together reasonably there. But the days that are hard for her there, we know about without her saying it, as we feel the effects when she is "safe" at home and can let out all the stresses in meltdowns with us over the littlest things.

DD is also VERY quiet in new situations and with people she doesn't know (including the appointments with clinic and Drs). But can then open up into little miss Chatty or else lash out as little miss Demon once we are alone again (even if that's a quiet waiting room or the walk to the car, not even as long as getting home again). Which little miss appears depends on how stressed she has been (regular general anxiety about reasonably famliar but unliked trips to anyone medical, versus major stresses about completely new and unfamiliar places and trying to fit in with new people).

At least the school are on board, understand her reasonably well, and have really acknowledged how hard she has worked this year to keep herself under control and also to work on her social skills. (Not only were the reports from both class teacher and SEN really good to read, but the Principal's note at the end was just so positive on DD's efforts and acknowledging her difficulties, I was in tears, but good ones).

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