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Teenager with Dyspraxia???

(8 Posts)
awwwwmannnn Wed 22-May-13 22:04:34

Hi, apologies about the long post...but here goes!!

my DSD is 16 years old and doesn't come across as your normal teenager.

as she is getting older, her "symptoms" are more noticeable - here's the list:

- she has to be reminded to do everything, clean her teeth, brush her hair, what time to go bed, to wake up in the morning. her personal hygiene is very poor, if we didn't tell her to shower, she would go days and days without washing! she has no ability to remember instructions, basic or otherwise at all.

- looks clumsy and heavy footed when walking. has poor co-ordination and still can't handle a knife and fork properly. her handwriting is very untidy, and at times illegible. she struggles very hard with writing words down in an order that makes sense

- getting dressed - it can take her half hour just to put a top on and putting shoes can take up to 15 mins, tying shoe laces is an experience in itself.

- eating food, she is soooo slow at eating food, she could have her food put down in front of a good 5 mins before anyone else, and will still be the last one eating with loads of food on her plate when everyone else has finished. i asked her to wash the dishes once, there was about 3 plates and a few knives and forks - 10 mins later she had washed 2 plates and that was it!

- she has one or two friends, but very very rarely does anything with them or bothers with them. she is quite immature in a social setting, can be very inappropriate and can very often say the wrong thing. she has no grasp of sarcasm or irony and is very literal with how she takes things and how she says them. she struggles with speech, finds it very hard to get across what she means.

- she can be very dramatic if something happens. she had a little cut on her toe and wanted to take the day off school, she was limping everywhere, saying "ow" "ow" "ow" on literally every step on the stairs. where as somone might have a headache take a couple of pills and get on with it, she will tell you every 5 minutes how much it hurts, will cry, will not be able to do anything and will say 2-3 days later how much it still hurts etc, this is not just with a headache, i mean literally with everything, even a small thing like bumping her arm on a chair or something.

- she is very immature, she will sit and watch programmes aimed at 8-12 years old all the time.

- she has no sense of timing or anything. i wake her up at 6.45am and say we have to be leaving the house at 7.30 so you need to get ready. i will go in her room at 7.25am and she will be sat in her bed with just her shirt on, its literally taking her over 30 minutes just to put a shirt on.

ON THE PLUS SIDE lol

she is so very caring, loving and such a sweet darling girl. when talking about a subject she is keen on, she is so animated and excited and its just so lovely to see her getting excited about something. she has the patience of a saint, and is beautiful with the biggest most wonderful smile. she is loyal, passionate and a joy to be around.

to see her with animals and young children is just wonderful - her face lights up and she just looks like a different person. she has no fear with them and its hard to describe but she just looks so happy and peaceful with the - it really is lovely to see her like this

so anyway, by chance i came across an article on Dyspraxia and so many of the "symptoms" seem to describe my DsD.

i know that no one can give a diagnosis over the 'net, i'm just looking for people's views more than anything.

awwwwmannnn Wed 22-May-13 22:07:28

her speech is also very poor, she just seems unable to speak clearly or fluently.

this may seem like a strange one, but she is extremely flexible - she can get her legs right over her head.

sorry...i know i've gone on and probably not covered everything but these are the main points that worry me and her dad??

awwwwmannnn Thu 23-May-13 13:16:54

bit of a bump grin xx

ladyMaryQuiteContrary Thu 23-May-13 13:25:12

Sounds like my 14 year old ds. His paediatrician will only say that he has a developmental delay as his social skills are not great. She has mentioned aspergers and dyspraxia as they are both developmental delays but she doesn't know which one as they overlap.

The 'dramatic' side of your dd sounds like she has a sensity processing problem. People with this have sensory problems that are not the 'norm' so may find a bump incredibly painful or may not feel it at all. Certain sounds may be painful and they may only eat certain foods (spicy or bland which is on the other end of the scale).

I'd pop to the GP and take it from there. She could certainly do with some help with her day to day problems. smile

awwwwmannnn Thu 23-May-13 13:36:10

Thanks Lady - you hit the nail on the had with foods, in total there are 7 foods she will actually eat willingly...and all of it crap! we have such a fight to get her to eat something different.

what is the outcome with your son now, is it going any further with help and assistance for him or a kind of wait and see type of thing?

x

ladyMaryQuiteContrary Thu 23-May-13 13:42:41

All beige and bland? I know that one. I was told by the OT not to worry as the stress can make them worse. I'd give her vitamin pills though.

He was supposed to have a physio assessment as his feet are incredibly painful when he walks but they have been a bit crap at this to be honest. The OT assessed him and we're waiting to see if they can offer him any support. They have referred him to CAHMS for help with his social skills and the paediatrician has advised me to look at social skills books aimed at children with aspergers (even though she isn't sure). Ds has the added problem of being incredibly bright so prefers adult company and is generally OK with adults (if he likes them) as he finds children his own age immature. He's argumentative as he doesn't like being treated as a child so this is swinging things more towards aspergers but I'm not convinced.

awwwwmannnn Thu 23-May-13 13:55:02

god its so difficult isn't it!
DSD is the opposite, she prefers to be around younger people as she relates to them better. she tries so hard bless her to mix in with people her own age but it just doesn't work. she can be so inappropriate in what she says and it puts up barriers before people get to know her. she has no empathy at all so can be quite hurtful, although she doesn't mean to be.

its great that your DS is bright, as unfortunately DSD is very much on the other end of that spectrum.

when it comes to something she enjoys like books or TV/Films she can remember everything down to the last detail, and can tell you all about a film she watched 10 years ago...ask her what she done this morning or if she cleaned her teeth "she can't remember".

its so frustrating for us all and most of all for her - she knows she's different and doesn't want to be. we support her and try to make life easier for her, but at the end of the day i said to DH that we have to try to do something so she can live an independent life as we won't always be around to remind her and help her with the little things.

its so hard when first in the morning i have to sort myself out for work, get my 2.6 DD dressed and ready for CM, and then constantly be on DSD's back to make sure she has done basic hygiene, taken her tablets for epilepsy and got everything she needs....i'm frazzled and feel like i've done a day's work by the time i leave for work lol

Hopefully things will move now with your son and things put in place to assist him - it'd be helpful and useful to know what they can do to assist. i suppose PT and OT will help loads, especially with little things like tying shoelaces.

i just wish i could keep her in the house, away from the nasty horrible people in her school and keep her safe and away from reality as it sucks for her it really does xx

ladyMaryQuiteContrary Thu 23-May-13 14:23:18

sad Sounds very stressful for you. I find it a lot easier if I put ds's clothes on his bed when I wake him up so that he doesn't have to find them himself. If she's struggling to fasten buttons then you could half fasten them in advance so she can put the shirt on like a jumper. She may be zombiefied when she wakes up so are you able to take her a drink before she gets dressed? The school should be able to help with the social side of things, I bought ds a social skills book from Amazon which has helped. I'd have a chat with your GP and get a referral to the community paediatrician.

Ds has empathy, it only kicked in a few years ago though and seems to be OTT as he'll start crying if there's a dead bird in the road. It's calming down now though so may have been a hormonal thing. He's in a private school as there's less children to bully him. sad The teachers give him a lot of support and the work is very hard but he still has problems. His personal tutor and I are helping all the time and I hope the CAHMS appointment helps as well.

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