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Why would nursery teacher want a house visit?

(33 Posts)
Aika Mon 29-Apr-13 14:31:22

Our lovely 3.5 y.o. DS is being investigated for ASD. He is not speaking, showing communication delays and resisting toilet training. He is no trouble otherwise and is a clear favourite of one of his nursery teachers. We really like her and so far have had a great relationship with her. Last week out of nowhere she suggested that she should do a home visit to observe how we interact with DS at home. When asked why she was very evasive regarding her reasons for wanting to do this. What could this mean? Should I worry?

zzzzz Mon 29-Apr-13 20:41:00

The point is "how will it help?". I'm pretty sure "how to drive a toy car down a ramp" is lower down on the list than say "how to line up at nursery", and even that is way below "don't bite". The point is that if the professionals idea of what's important isn't the same as yours, you should be the one evaluating if it is worth your time.

I too have had comments on our house (In our case written in to the report!! shock ).

In some ways I am incredibley lucky in that ds is my middle child, and at least one of my children is so sickeningly able it's rather hard to say it is nurture (though some rather brave individuals do still try). I feel honour bound to point out the stupidity of saying my interaction with one of 5 children could have caused what is obviously (if you have even a modicum of intelligence) a neurological disorder.

DailyNameChanger Mon 29-Apr-13 23:11:10

Lol zzz Hurrah for the well behaved, high achieving sibling. I have one of those too.

zzzzz Tue 30-Apr-13 11:43:10


Bigpants1 Tue 30-Apr-13 11:43:53

Lol, me too zzzzz!
Aika, I have "been in the system" a looong time, & a bit (a lot) of a cynic.
But, if this request has made you uncomfortable, I would trust your gut instinct. If someone wants to do a home visit, they should be able to look you in the eye & give clear, concise reasons for doing so. If she can't do this, say no.
You will learn, as you go through the system with your ds, that some professionals have another agenda, other than what they say to your face. Like in other professions, you will find good & "bad" people. You will also find, that profess. talk with each other freely. Anytime a profess. says they are going to write a Report on your ds, ask for a copy, & keep a note of e-mails & telephone calls.
Sorry, but I did laugh, when you said to a previous poster, "why would they say that about your house, would they help you get another one?" You would think, wouldn't you? But, for some reason, when you have a dc with SN, some profess. think they can say what they want, however unjustified, however pointless, then walk out of your life, leaving you upset & questioning yourself.
I don't want to put you off seeking help for your ds, but always trust your instinct, & develop some broad shoulders! x

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Tue 30-Apr-13 11:46:01

Say no.

She's not qualified to do an assessment.

iAutism Tue 30-Apr-13 12:33:55

We invited the nursery manager and key worker to the house. Great opportunity for them to understand DC home environment,current issues and also the work we do with her. Good catchup for you on how your child is progressing in the nursery setting. Also The autism team went to observe DC in the nursery. The nursery manager very detailed report was very useful for the statementing process.

Its great they have taken an interest some places dont.


blueberryupsidedown Tue 30-Apr-13 12:56:05

DS's nursery key worker and SaLT both came to our house when he started nursery. He behaves differently at home, he is much more 'himself' than at school (he used to isolate himself from other children and not talk at all) but when they came home he was very proud to show them his toys, his room, his big brother, and they got to know each other better and I think there were benefits for both my child and the teacher/SaLT. I don't see any problem with it, but then they never called it an assessment and never said that it was to observe how we interact with him. It was just a home visit, and I think that most kids in his speech unit had one.

Handywoman Tue 30-Apr-13 21:46:49

"If someone wants to do a home visit, they should be able to look you in the eye & give clear, concise reasons for doing so. If she can't do this, say no."

...lorks I think that just about sums it up!!!

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