Ds has a food phobia, very limited diet etc (and hates writing)
I just got him to write a 'shopping list' and got him to agree to come shopping and for him to do his own shop ie only the things on the list, but he pushes the trolley, put the things in etc (he hates shopping usually and its a big performance to get him to come and he wont touch the food i put in)
Now he is refusing to go, as he has to get dressed (something else he hates) but will go happily if i dont make him getted dressed and let him go in his pj's and flip flops.
Im obviously asking him to a lot of things he doesnt like all in one go. Would you let him go in pj's or make him getted dressed?
Track suit bottoms and t-shirts are all he wears anyhow. He is 9.
Obviously i can make him get dressed, it will involve lots of going stiff and prising arms and legs, trying to run away and hiding etc.
But it will set the tone for the whole shopping trip, he will refuse to get in the car, he will refuse to get out of the car, he will refuse to carry the list or get the items or push the trolley etc, etc.
What could be a happy, nice experience, will turn into a horrid one, for us both.
I would thank him and congratulate him for making a list. I would tell him that we won't go shopping today because he won't get dressed, but that it's a shame because you had planned to buy <<insert really appealing something>> while you were there.
Progress is progress, but if you let him go to the shop in his PJs then you have another battle ahead. So, count the progress as writing about something he hates (food).
Spinning in circles, spinning on the floor and running in the supermarket was greatly reduced due to him pushing the trolley and obviously not feeling as anxious as he would having to deal with 'my food' too in the trolley. We had the odd spin, here and there, when we stopped, but nothing like if i try to take him shopping with me on a normal shop.
crisps green apples bread lettuce (new) carrots (has eaten in the past, but not for a very long time) yorkshire puddings sausage rolls (has eaten in the past etc) peanuts (has eaten in the past etc) cabbage (new)
He had eaten his lunch of toast before we went shopping. When we got back he had two slices of french bread and butter and a bowl of raw cabbage (and ate it!!)
2 mini sausages rolls are now cooking in the oven to go with his yorkshire puds for dinner!!
Oh and he picked up his own food, put in his trolley and crossed off his list.
He needed a bit of help with staying organised, he was flapping about holding the list, the pen, the trolley and having to pick up food, getting a bit confused as to how to do it and needed a bit of prompting. But other than that, he was fine