Dd 13 has developed joint pains and weakness after taking a drug for her acne. This has been going on since October last year and no medical reason for it has been identified. Last weekend she got considerably worse and can now barely mobilise at all even on her crutches. She has always been quite stoical about it but is now fed up and complaining of being in a lot of pain. Paed reckons it may be psychosomatic because of the 'difficult home situation' ie Ds's disabilities. He has referred her to a psychologist - the waiting list is over a year. Yesterday I phoned the paed again and he did phone back. He wants to admit her as an inpatient to do further tests, physio, get a second opinion and bypass the waiting list by getting her to see the ward mental health worker. Now I am glad something is being done, but I feel quite upset about the thought of my little girl who has always been the ok one being in hospital. It is so sad to see her struggling and she is mostly very brave. I think myself that it doesn't seem psychological but if it is I am doubtful about effective treatment being available. And if it isn't I am terrified about the possiblity of her having a long term disability even though I should be used to that and accepting.
I phoned the SENCO at school today to ask for some quite minor adjustments to be made for her and got a load of patronising stuff. SENCO: Have you told the paediatrican about her deterioration? Me: Yes I have just told you that I have and what he planned to do about it. SENCO: Bottom shuffling (which is what she is doing to get around the house at the moment) is bad for her psychologically. Me (thinks): Maybe but is being stuck in one place any better? AArrggh.
All this on top of all this Ds is stressing about finishing course work and exams. I have been pretty unwell myself with whatever mystery illness I have and DH is being worse than no help at all.
Five days max in hospital he said so no big deal in itself. She doesn't particularly want to go - who would - mainly because she doesn't want to miss school but is resigned because she does want a solution to her difficulties. She is just sooo sensible!
Funnel all frustration into hating the senco because she sounds like a tit. Next time she spouts about what is "psychologically bad for her" perhaps thank her for her insight and explain that you are consulting trained medical advisors so possibley her amateur efforts are unhelpful at best. Honestly you are so patient!
I think admitting her is a good plan. Hopefully they can get to the bottom of it and she can start getting better.
Thanks zzzzz. Yes this SENCO is hot on her amateur psychology. I discovered that after Ds had been in the school a while and after that I avoid her and just used the head of the unit Ds was attached to. I even spoke to her about Dd although she wasn't strictly in her remit. However that lovely head was relocated at Easter so I have no choice now.
Sounds like the senco is going to be challenging on that front. Perhaps the paediatrician would write a letter about appropriate/inappropriate support? Mine is very understanding about that sort of nonsense, and has a fine turn of phrase. . I think they enjoy squashing "educators".
NoHaudin, nothing to add really as brain is on a go slow and everyone has already said what I could think of, but sending a gentle hug and hoping the hospital stay manages to get to the bottom of what's going on and come up with a plan to help your dd.
I think admission would be a good route - they will be able to observe her, and the nurses will see her determination and grit - they'll tell the doctor that they can see she's really trying and that she's physically unable to do it - nurses see a lot
Oh thanks Lougle. Yes I'm glad it is being taken seriously.
Polter fingers crossed for the rest of the week then.
Dd came home from school exhausted. Literally collapsed on the floor in the hallway. She has now revived is laughing at Harry Potter (which she is reading for about the fourth time) and is determined to go to her drama class tonight because she wants to audition for a part in 'Annie'.
I had a pretty awful review meeting for Ds. They insisted that Dh came and pushed family therapy again. I try to make sure DH doesn't come to meetings for a reason.
Yes it is. Causes all sorts of added complications. I have agreed to meet the family therapist on my own and dh will do similarly. I will then see what I think. I met her once in a meeting and was put off because she has what Ds calls a therapist's voice - all soft and breathy.
Just had a phone call from school. Dd has fallen over and been unable to get up so they are sending her home. Dh has a day off today so has gone to get her. I am waiting for a call from the GP as I really don't know where to go from here.