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Advice plz on dd2 3.8yrs

(4 Posts)
Stressedtothehilt Mon 15-Apr-13 16:40:34

Sorry if this is long but I'm now at end of my tether and feeling close to some sort of breakdown! Dd1 has ADHD she's not the problem. Dd2 is 3.8 amd was born at 32 wks, only required cpap. At 9 months referred to physio as couldn't roll over.

Physio referred to CDC as DD had sensory issues.
Stayed in nursery group every weekly at CdC for a year. Pyschologist discharged her on basis that dd was too intelligent and had no peer group and was actually quite shitty with us.

We've had portage. Discharged from that as dd could do all the puzzles etc. seen a pead for over a year who kept promising ados test which never materialised (coincidentally same pead who ex my eldest daughter). So we asked pead to refer us to camhs who were quite helpful with my eldest dd.

Camhs sit and listen to my concerns but don't really say they're going to do anything! We have a community OT who is good and coming tomoz.

Issues are:
Hyperactive and poor attention
On melatonin 6mg for sleep issues and still have problems
Very very fussy with food, if its not a fish finger or choc spread sarnie she won't eat it.
Awful separation anxiety particularly on going into nursery.
Reacts badly to loud noises and covers her ears.
Has no friends at nursery.
Doesn't really play with her toys, likes sorting and lining up her stuff.
Has good eye contact with us but had delayed speech although caught up now.
Can be mute for several hours if she's anxious.
Hates people sitting behind her.
Will not wear clothing with buttons on, very clothes fussy!!
Reacts badly to being centre of attention, doesn't like being kissed.
There is many others but I don't want to drape this out.

I spoke to camhs this week as was at end of my rope and when on phone dd escaped out the front door and ran up the street! Camhs coming to see me at home this week but what should I be asking for?

Dd has no diagnosis amd we've sort of been left! Nursery have written a few reports now for pead and camhs expressing concerns over social and concentration issues.

She seems so 'ok amd age appropriate' and even above average at times and other times she seems around a 2 yr old level.

I'm exhausted. Any advice as to what I should be asking for appreciated

Stressedtothehilt Mon 15-Apr-13 17:05:49

Forgot to add she's heavily reliant on her dummy needs to have two with her for sleeping, she has an awful temper with very bad meltdowns and tantrums and she adamantly refuses the simplest of requests ie get dressed, come inside etc. if its not her way it's no way!

Ineedmorepatience Mon 15-Apr-13 20:21:45

I would write a list of all your concerns. See if you can think of real expamples where she has done things you think are unusual/quirky.

I always used to go blank when HCP's asked me a question about Dd3 so found writing stuff down really helped.

Good lucksmile

Stressedtothehilt Mon 15-Apr-13 21:04:15

Thanks yes I usually do try and do a list of examples. Am very worried about she will be in September when she strts reception

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