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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on SN.

Do you get fed up of the intrusion into your life because you have a disabled child?

(53 Posts)
Owllady Mon 15-Apr-13 10:05:14

I am having one of those days.

But I don't think i can even put into words how demoralising it can be sometimes. You try your hardest every single day, sometimes you can't cope but you get up put one put in front of the other and someone else's needs always come before yours and yet you get criticisms, often unhelpful, from people who are supposed to be there to support you. It's as if somehow you have become public property, you are no longer just someone's Mum you are accountable for all of it, everything. As if it wasn't overwhelming enough


moondog Wed 17-Apr-13 22:32:09

I am often amazed at the level of intrusiveness that people put up with and advice would always be that if people are not offering you anything tangible or measurable then cut them loose. (Having said that I am also bemused at the fact that some people seem to enjoy, nay thrive on the attention that being involved with myriad busybodies from the 'caring professions' (hurl) brings.

Of course, it's easier for people like me to say 'Get rid!' as I have experience of hundreds of kids with SEN. Not quite the same when it's your child and your first experience.

I let one well meaning but ultimatley useless ed psych in once for a session of 'solution focus' input (oh and a lot of conversation about her earnest and right on holiday choices).
Utter waste of time and energy.
Any soution focus has and always will be provided by me. hmm

Bluebirdonmyshoulder Wed 17-Apr-13 22:37:15

That's good advice moondog, I know just who I'm going to cut loose. Been wanting to do it for a while and was trying to think of a socially acceptable excuse.

Now I'm just going to be honest and say we have so many appointments and I'm prioritising!

hazeyjane Thu 18-Apr-13 09:12:49

I think at the beginning it is hard to know the people who are going to be the important people in your dcs life. Our portage worker has become very important to us, I don't think I would have predicted that at the beginning, and found it odd to have this larger than life character in our house, playing these big exaggerated games with ds. But he adores her, and the way she connects with him is brilliant, he loves the slapstick and big dramatic gestures we have her picture up on our fridge!

But it took us a year to realise that ds's ot was just crap, I didn't even realise what she should be doing, and it was very cathartic to sit in a room with her and ask her what she was supposed to be doing for ds, and after she explained, to say that I didn't think she was doing any of those things, and could we have someone else please.

We have had the opposite of a lot here, in that we have struggled to have people do home visits, despite ds being very difficult in other environments. I have become a lot more bolshie about the whole thing, and now we do get more home visits, and I prefer that because they get to see ds, rather than him climbing in my lap and hiding.

In fact ds's physio is coming over at 10, so I had better clear a path amongst the toys!

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