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Friday Night Thread

(69 Posts)
StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:13:09

Interesting week.

Got an absolute pasting on AIBU.

Got an independent expert in to see ds who confirmed he is in the right placement (after a year of him being there). Not perfect and room for improvement, but generally a good place full of kind, caring and keen staff who are open and non-defensive.

DS had a grommet operation on Monday, DD finally got her ENT appointment through for in a couple of weeks after I called and queried if they really meant April.

DH came home early with a sickness bug.

zzzzz Fri 08-Feb-13 17:24:12

Yay! Friday, absolute dog of a week here.

Feeling totally restless and have a terrible urge to sell up and hippy round the world. 3 out of 4 children hating school. Grim.

Surely it is supposed to be more fun than this.

Ds is very rambled echolalic this week which always worries me. SALT are seeing us next week so it will be interesting to see what she thinks.

Ineedmorepatience Fri 08-Feb-13 17:25:36

Star I am sure we have told you before.... stay away from AIBU, its a baaad placesad

Dd3 has been developing the art of Dramaqueenitis this week she has tried everything to have a pyjama day, unfortunately for her I was too busy at work to let her get away with it.

Hope everyone else has survived the week and has a good weekendsmile

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:26:42

Oh, thank god. I told myself that when someone else posted, I could open the wine......

Sorry you've had a bad week. May well follow you round the world if you do it. Things are good atm, but honestly, there's room for improvement and a LOT really.

Good for me, means not fighting anyone, which would have been so had I not started an AIBU thread grin

wine cheers

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 17:29:04

Evening Star, I seem to be stalking you on MNSN this afternoon/evening. I'm not honest.

Sorry about the pasting. Did you start an AIBU thread or post on someone else's?

Reassuring for you to have it confirmed that ds is in the right place. Have to admit from your description of it, it sounds like heaven compared to my dc's school.

Hope ds is recoving ok from his op. Is dd having similar problems?

They boys told me a sickness bug is doing the rounds of our school as well. Apparently three children in ds1's class were sent home before 10.00 am this morning after vomiting in the classroom hmm and both dd's nursery teacher and her daughter, who dd has played with every day this week were off today after vomiting last night. We don't stand a chance do we? <sigh>

Not much news in the Moose household, usual problems with ds1 and school, but luckily his old teacher got involved and is dealing with it.

Ds2 has been a lot of pain with his joints, waking in the night screaming in pain either from joints locking or subluxing or severe cramp. His shoulder dislocated for the first time in the middle of the night last night and he was so distressed it was heartbreaking.

I continue to have the flakiest health on the planet, having had severe anaemia for a couple of weeks and been pretty much welded to the sofa as a result. Also continuing to have lots of frankly bizarre neuro symptoms and still haven't heard anything from my neuro following on from my EEG on 31st December and MRI on 15th Jan. hmm

Can't be bothered to chase, I have enough going on, without more hospital appoitments to contend with.

Other than that, still waiting with baited breath to find out whether or not ds1 gets the indie placement we want. Deadline for naming is next Friday and I'm getting twitchy because they did say that if he got it, we might get a call from the school transport bods before the deadline, so we'd know in advance anyway. I can't stand all this waiting and not knowing whether or not we are facing a tribunal appeal to get him into the right placement.

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 17:33:48

Cross posted.

Not surprising really, when I type 10 words for everyone else's two. blush

zzzz, I hear you. Dh and I have been getting restless as well. We dream of just packing everyone up and going - as far away from SENCOs and LEAs and statementing and admissions as we can get.

Ineed, loving the description of Dramaqueenitis - I think my dd may already have it. She is such a ..... four year old girl at the moment. The whingeing, the nagging the constant tears and dramatics - and I foolishly thought that having an NT child would be easier. I honestly think I just don't know how to do NT children. blush

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:35:51

I started the thread. It seems I have a number of MN anti-fans, who admitted they were being nasty because they didn't like something I once said in the past, and then started to search for old posts and link to them in order to 'prove' that I was evil. They also interpreted and misquoted other things from the same thread. It was all quite nasty actually.

It began with general posts about me not having respect for caring carrots.

Teach me to have any faith in main board users having a clue.

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:37:43

Oooh, Moose I didn't know your dd was 4 as well. What an hellish interesting age!

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:39:13

How does the appeal stuff work then Moose? Are you expecting new statement by 14th Feb?

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:39:48

Ah, Friday, 15th. They have your preference in writing?

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 17:40:28

Bastards though. They're hardly going to be making the decision on Thurs evening are they?

FightingForSurvival Fri 08-Feb-13 17:42:24

Hi all. Wow what a week for us too. DS got dx of ASD and a few other bits n bobs. Lovely paediatrician, of course we are now discharged which I knew would happen. She looked relieved that we didn't kick off about that but know enough peeps to know the score. Statutory assessment is under way. Just going to let it all sink in for a bit. After half term need to think about whether we stay in MS or go for special or unit. I really don't know, think we will have to do visits and a pros and cons list. Any advice on this appreciated. I will probably be starting several threads over the next few weeks now that dx is in place. Been a rollercoaster time, I have had to put recent bereavement to one side as I knew this bit was coming and had to be able to deal with it. I've shocked myself a bit last 3 months with my coping mechanism, talk about compartmentalising your emotions!! Now that both the biggies have happened just need to take stock a bit and then onto the rest of our life really. Big hugs to all who have had a bad week.

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 17:47:06

Omg, they admitted they were deliberately being antagonistic because of something you said in the past! I hope MN deleted them, because there's no way they could claim that doesn't constitute deliberate bullying. angry

Ah yes - she's 4 alright. hmm I seem to be spending a lot of time explaining to ds1 - who is rather confused about where his lovely baby sister has gone - that she isn't inherently bad or naughty - she's just 4! Yesterday he stood there, looked very concerned and said "Mummy, I don't think I like 4 year old girls very much." grin

Mind you he may have a point, dd has decided she loves letters - which one would think might be a good thing - until she tries to spell out the word 'bug'. We did 'd-o-g' = dog fine, we did 'b-a-g' = bag - all still ok, then we did 'b-u-g' = bugger! shock Of course in my current sleep deprived state I totally failed to handle it properly and just say it again properly - oh no - instead I made the mistake of saying, "no dd, it's not bugger, it's bug". "B-U-G = BUGGER" says dd - "no dd, not bugger - bug - bugger isn't a nice word, please don't say it" - doh! I knew as soon as it came out of my mouth what I'd done - but it was too late. At least she hasn't said it outside the house .... yet! blush

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 17:54:35

Nope, they have to name a school on the amended statement by 15 Feb. So, in reality what that means is that they will type it on Friday afternoon, then post it on their slowest, untrackable postal service and we might get it, if we are lucky and the wind is in the right direction, about 7-10 days later.

If they have named any of the schools in our area it will mean a tribunal, as if the local school can't take him, none of the other schools can either, as they are all large secondary academies with pretty much the same set ups.

Yes, they have our preference in writing. We initially named the local Academy of course, so have had to contact them to change it. We were temporarily buoyed when our officer told us they had sent the paperwork to the indie to ask if they would take him if the LEA name them and then we received a letter asking us to confirm in writing we want the indie to be our first choice. (We'd already done it of course. grin) Not sure what it all means really and scared to speculate.

The inclusion team, who the LEA officer told us have the most sway re appropriate secondary placement, want him in the indie and have successfully got kids in there over the last couple of years. So that's something - but who knows.

I honestly think I will have gone mad by the time we find out.

Badvoc Fri 08-Feb-13 17:58:20

Hope you are ok star?
Shitty week here, not dc, but just generally.
Awful church council meeting - am not standing for nomination again.
Awful b of gov meeting - had to agree to something because it was the right thing to do, but I am still sad and upset about it.
Mum is having her op -finally!- on Monday but she is getting older and it's a big op sad
New conservatory roof on - sort of - they broke one of the glass panels so not going to be done now til Tuesday <stares at tip of a house>
And to top it all this morning I have awoken with swollen glans, sore throat, and thrush just in time for half term.

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 17:59:05

Fighting, what a week indeed. How do you feel about the dx?

You do right to give yourself some breathing space and time to let it sink in. Dx is always a difficult pill to swallow, even if you are expecting it.

So sorry to hear you've had a bereavement to cope with as well on top of everything else.

Hope you manage to get some time to take stock and take care of yourself and just 'be' for a while.

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 18:00:30

Aw Badvoc. wine

Good luck to your mum for Monday.

Is it half term for you next week?

Badvoc Fri 08-Feb-13 18:18:13

Yes, dc broke up today.
Thanks for good wishes.
It's a big op sad

EllenJaneisstillnotmyname Fri 08-Feb-13 18:28:02

Ooh, shall I go searching for your fred, Star?

Crossing fingers for you, moose. I take it 15th Feb is just before half term?

Hope your mum's op goes well, Badvoc.

Fighting, I'd expect a bit of a down time now your adrenalin has run out. (((hugs)))

Waves at zzzzz and Ineed.

I've had a rather stressful week, mostly to do with exH, rather than any SN issues. ExH is taking the boys to Disney in Florida this summer (Disney dad!) and asked me when would be good time. I replied, avoid the first week of the holiday as DS1 is 1st reserve on a Geog field trip to Iceland, and if he doesn't get on the trip he'll go to France with his best friend. Any other time, so long as I get a clear 10 days for a holiday with the boys. So, he books accommodation for the Friday at the end of the first week. hmm angry

TBF, I don't think he did it on purpose, he's just a prat. Now DS1 definitely can't go to France, and the Iceland trip returns on the Thursday evening...

Disney has never appealed to me, so I'm glad they can go without me having to pay for it, but I can't help feeling a bit jealous. Not sure how DS2 will cope, with Florida heat in July and the queues.

I've also had to pay off the mortgage because the Halifax wouldn't give me a mortgage in my own name, so I had to cash in my small endowment policy early.

DS2's school have been on the phone as he's getting more and more reluctant to do any work. I think his TAs started the year underestimating his ability and doing a lot of scribing for him, so now they realise he can write for himself, he's unsurprisingly not keen. Also trying to get them to remember he is allowed to use a laptop for longer writing tasks. Anyway. Rant over.

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 18:29:30

If you fancy getting into a rage ellen, although it might read quite funny after a glass of wine or two.

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 08-Feb-13 18:30:05

15th Feb is a statutory date, in order to ensure there is enough time for a tribunal if needed.

moosemama Fri 08-Feb-13 18:39:38

Bang on Ellen, kids break up on the 15th! hmm

Oh ffs, what is it with men being unable to manage their blooming diaries. Honestly it drives me batty! Poor ds2 as well, think I'd rather go to Iceland than Disney meself.

Star's absolutely right about it being the statutory date, but there's nothing to say that LEAs can't name before that date, especially in cases where it's the day the kids break up for half-term. hmm

hazeyjane Fri 08-Feb-13 18:42:22


Waves and honks to everyone.

Knackered here, ds had a sleep study at home on Weds, will get the official report next week, but his 02 levels were going down to 74, so I think he will need some oxygen at home, although they are thinking obstructive sleep apnea, so want to do another, fuller sleep study.

Also had 2 emergency appointments wrt his chest, one picked up another infection in his left lung, so he has another 3 weeks worth of antibiotics, after which they want to do a ct scan, as they believe he may have scarring on his lung, or have aspirated something which won't shift. So it has been a week of coughing, meds, bleepy machines and chest physio in the hazey household!

Oh and we have a date for ds's statement meeting....ulp!!

FightingForSurvival Fri 08-Feb-13 18:44:49

moosemama, it was no shock, he's five and it's been apparent for some time. The process was quite straightforward, I knew he would be diagnosed, but I still went round all the what ifs in my head. The nice part has been how much the professionals involved have stressed that it's not down to parenting, not that I thought it was but in the back of your mind you are wondering if that's what they think! Just paranoia though I know! I think dx will help in so many different words but yes, of course, in an ideal world I wish he wasn't ASD but I have known for quite a while now so no shock factor. Just means we can move forward. But yes, do need to take some time really. The big issue is school, whether we move him and if so, how. I think we would get a placement for him elsewhere but it's the logistics of it and actually he is quite happy now, but his needs are significant. I really just don't know. I guess it's just going to have to play out over the next few months ...

silverfrog Fri 08-Feb-13 18:50:50

all on a reasonably even keel here.

sympathies to those of you having tough times, and lots of wine for all.

ellen - you don't need to queue at Disney (or rather your ex and the boys won't need to) - just go to the main customer services in Magic Kingdom (in Market Square, just inside the gates) and tell them you have a child with disabilities in your party. they are not allowed ot ask for any proof of this, so no letters required. you then get a card naming the affected person and stating how many in your group. this acts as an exit pass for your whole stay.

the disability entrances/queues are often straight indoors rather than waiting in the heat etc, and as you'd expect. much shorter. we waited maximum 20 minutes for most, with the only ride where it was longer was Toy Story (then brand new) - and still only 30 mins rather than 2 hours or so. queues are also much better managed than over here - lots to look at and do etc. dd1 was fine with it all, and this was 2 years ago now, so she was 6.

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