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Feeling nervous about DD2's appointment tomorrow

(70 Posts)
lougle Tue 01-Jan-13 21:07:07

What if the paed doesn't see what we are seeing? We will still be left with the same child, who still has all the issues we see.

Today, she had a major meltdown. She couldn't find her socks at Nanny and Grandad's. She wouldn't wear her shoes because she had no socks. She didn't want to leave with bare feet. We didn't have her socks - they may have gone home with her cousin. She was hysterical and her solution was for DH to drive home, collect some socks and drive back again, so that we could all drive home.

Then, she was incensed because DDs 1&3 were singing. They wouldn't stop, so she was screaming 'SILENCE, SILENCE, SILENCE, SILENCE!!!!!!'

I have another migraine sad

babiki Tue 01-Jan-13 22:17:28

Lougle just want to wish you good luck and for the doctor to be useful! Will be thinking of you x

Ineedmorepatience Tue 01-Jan-13 22:19:48

Good luck for tomorrow lougle

Remember you know your Dd2 better than anyone, stick to your guns.

Ineedmorepatience Tue 01-Jan-13 22:22:42

Regarding the socks, Dd3 came home from the park with her wooly hat on her foot because her sock was covered in mud but she couldnt possibly sit in the car for 5 minutes with a bare footconfused

mariammama Tue 01-Jan-13 22:26:37

It will be ok. You already know how to talk to paediatricians so they 'hear' you. They don't need to see it (yet), they just need to believe there are valid concerns and make a plan for how to explore them.
Get there early, give dd2 a biscuit and have a brew in the hospital cafe before going down the corridor, so you have your 'I belong here' head firmly on.

Handywoman Tue 01-Jan-13 22:41:33

Mariammama is spot on. I will be thinking of you, Lougle. Good luck x

lougle Tue 01-Jan-13 22:50:06

You're right, I'm being silly. I think I want answers, so I'm geared up for a big appointment, when we'll probably get an 'ok, keep a diary for 6 years then come back.'

blackeyedsusan Wed 02-Jan-13 01:56:25

keep detaialed recods of things.. hopefully not for 6 years...

push them for an explanation of what else could be happening then.

have you been on a parenting course? they do like to send you on those first...(sigh) round here anyway. did one just in case they come back at me and say i do need to do one afterall.

good luck!

MammaTJ Wed 02-Jan-13 02:58:04

I have nothing useful to add, but wanted to wish you good luck.

coff33andmintspies Wed 02-Jan-13 03:05:17

An early good morning and good luck Lougle If you are like me I didnt sleep much the day before lol x

It will be ok. You will have your I belong head on as maria says.

Will be thinking of you.

lougle Wed 02-Jan-13 08:04:27

Good Morning smile

I'm hoping to avoid the parenting course suggestion (not that they aren't useful, but because they seem to be used as a delaying tool) as DD1 has complex SN, goes to SS and we've seen this Paed for the last 4 years with her. Also, DD2 isn't behaviourally challenging, really, just hard to deal with once she is fixated on something.

I slept like a log last night coffee, but only because I had such and awful migraine that I took my sumatriptan injection and a diazepam grin

Oh well, I'm confident that whatever it is, it's not going away, so even if he doesn't see it this time I'll be back like a bad penny and every time I see him with DD1, I'll mention DD2 wink

lougle Wed 02-Jan-13 08:06:01

Oh and I have a 10 page (10pt) document with my observations -quotes, etc.

PolterGoose Wed 02-Jan-13 08:23:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

silverfrog Wed 02-Jan-13 08:36:03

Good luck today, lougle.

Your story re: socks could have been written about my dd2. That is exactly the solution she came up with in a similar situation grin

Honestly, dd1 is more flexible than dd2 is!

lougle Wed 02-Jan-13 08:50:52

The language thing is odd, though. Does your DD2 have odd language, Silver?

We were meant to see the dentist this morning. I told her the dentist had canceled, and she said "dentists don't get poorly confused"Then she said "oh do you mean the person who looks at your teeth? I thought you meant the building was poorly, because you said the dentist was poorly and dentist is the building."

silverfrog Wed 02-Jan-13 09:04:20

Dd2 has some oddities about her language, yes.

She routinely gets completely muddled as to active/passive - not in a technical sense, but can eg say "Fred is cuddling George" when she means the exact opposite. She spends a lot of time sighing and saying "yes! I said that!" when she said nothing of the sort, or the exact opposite.

I think her general advanced language (she is the typical 'little profesor' type) are masking a deficit in comprehension.

Her biggest ( and most noticeable to others) issue is that she often place adjectives incorrectly, so will say things like 'I want a ball blue' or 'can I have some warm-leggers'. This is a very common ( and glaring, for her) mistake.

Handywoman Wed 02-Jan-13 09:14:02

Have you photocopied your 10-pager for the Paed, Lougle? Good to let them have one to read, huge time-saver.

Really hope you get somebody who does justice to your intelligent, child-centred approach. At least you will come out with a referral to SLT. Crossing everything here.

Let us know how it goes.

Handy xx

lougle Wed 02-Jan-13 09:15:18

With DD2 it seems to be the hundreds of clauses within clauses.

"mummy will you tell Daddy, and Daddy to tell the children, that is DD1 and DD3, that they must be quiet, because I am sleeping?"

"Mum, if somebody has some milk, and it's bedtime, and they don't drink the milk, and it's the next day, is it old milk?

It's exhausting to listen to grin

Ineedmorepatience Wed 02-Jan-13 12:06:15

That sounds like Dd3 lougle and if she misses a step out of whatever she is telling me she has to start all over again. Sometimes this can happen several times in one one sided coversation hmm

blackeyedsusan Wed 02-Jan-13 12:12:38

good luck/how did it go?

yes I got the impression that a parenting course is the first thing that comes outof the drs mouth when I went to the gp... had to pull the well in my professional opinion card... as a foundation/ks1 teacher and was allowed to miss that step grin my most valuable piece of paper is the report that says I am doing everything right and do not need the parenting course.

lougle Wed 02-Jan-13 13:29:20

Ok, so my report is 9300 words blush I think the doctor will regret saying 'so what are your concerns?'

coff33andmintspies Wed 02-Jan-13 15:48:16

Waiting and hoping all went ok smile

lisad123everybodydancenow Wed 02-Jan-13 16:28:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Handywoman Wed 02-Jan-13 16:32:46

Me too, am waiting and hoping (and honking some more).

lougle Wed 02-Jan-13 16:55:02

Well we're back. Basic summary is that speech doesn't concern him, but he noticed some physical coordination issues and some aspergers indications, but not enough of either to suggest a diagnosis.

So he's going to discuss her at the ASD referral meeting tomorrow, refer her to OT and audiology, copy the school in on the letter, then see her in 6 months.

He suggested reading about dyspraxia and reading the out of sync child.

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