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your opinion,good bad or ugly

(6 Posts)
Ahardmanisgoodtofind Sat 10-Nov-12 19:25:12

ds2.3. Took him to health visitor uhh week after trying to get appointm ent for months.we've always known his speech was delayed,he started saying a few words then just stopped.now he repeats car and mama.says uh oh and oh dear-correctly.as soon as
we entered hv office she asked if he was always hyper.bear in mind he was excited to be somewhere new and had been Sat down waiting for 20mins.long story short she spent an hour being very negative asking does he flap his arms-8times (no he doesn't) then said-and i quote his flitting is not normal.he was looking around the office.i cried at this and was promptly shouted at and told not to be stupid.he is being referred to speech and language-which we expected-but also to community pediatric-and im not sure why and have had mini (read massive) meltdown.i guess i want to know should i be concerned,or should i stop worrying and get a grip.sorry post is long!thanks x

TheLightPassenger Sat 10-Nov-12 19:43:09

It's impossible for any of us to tell online as to how concerned you should or shouldn't be, none of us can diagnose online; as it could be he is a late talker (at 2 it is possible that he will have a language spurt all of a sudden and start talking in brief sentences) or it could be there might be more longer lasting issues. It's good that the HV has taken your concerns seriously, but it is shocking that she was so unsympathetic to your distress.Has he been referred for a hearing test at all, to rule out any physical cause? Personally I would never tell anyone worried about their child's language development to get a grip btw.

Ineedalife Sat 10-Nov-12 19:44:54

Well firstly, I would find a new HV, TBF they are mostly crap but yours seems to have taken it to an extreme.

Dont go back, let the speech and lang and peadiatrician do there work and hopefully they will be more help to you.

Other than his speech do you have any other concerns about his development?

Ineedalife Sat 10-Nov-12 19:48:26

Oops sorry wrong their thats twice i have done that todayblush

Ahardmanisgoodtofind Sat 10-Nov-12 20:00:01

Having taken him to play groups and things we never really noticed anything massively different between him and the other children.but he doesn't know where body parts are or heh ask him to pass me something generally he doesn't-these were things the hv asked about.but give the boy a mobile phone or tv remote or ipad and he can work out what to do to get games up with in a minute-whether he's seen that product before or not.if he is interested in something-story game-he will concentrate for an hour.i haven't been around children so i haven't got a clue with should look out for and if i go on Google with this i just get autism symptoms. . . . Hv didn't seem to think his hearing is a problem. He's very stubborn,if he ignores or doesn't want to do something that's that,but I've been like that since birth if my mother is to be believed!

pinkorkid Sat 10-Nov-12 20:00:22

If I had been in your shoes, I'm sure I'd be worrying too - you go in with one specific concern and come out wondering if there is something going on that hadn't occurred to you before. However, the HV sounds like she has her own issues, her very poor social and communication skills and frankly unprofessional sounding attitude would make me somewhat wary of accepting her judgement on anything else without a few questions.

You know your son best. HV may be putting 2 and 2 together and making 5. I presume she is seeing speech delay/regression plus slightly hyper child and thinking possible red flags for autism. But although there is a chance that this could be the case, there are a number of other possible causes, including something as simple as glue ear.

It's good that you have the appointments in the pipeline for paed and salt - I hope they will be better at listening to you and will take the time to explain possible reasons both for the speech delay and for the other potential concerns raised by HV. Just be aware that sometimes it's not possible for the professionals to give definite answers this early in a child's life and with some things it may be a case of watch and wait.

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