Dyspraxia, schooling - please tell me it gets easier

[mrslaughan]

So DS is yr3 at a private school, has Fine motor dyspraxia and sensory intergration issues (sensory seeking)....end of last it was a really hard decision what to do about schooling. we looked at a specialist school - again would have been private, but decided not to go there as his peer group would have been tiny (probably3) and felt this was far too limiting. he is a very social boy, but finds group social things hard, so need experience, exposure to this. Also looked at state school - and felt that local one would do a lot well, but worried about 30 in his class and how he would cope. He really wanted to stay at current school.
His sensory integration therapy is going really well, and behaviour wise he has improved hugely.
His big barrier at school is now the motor planning and sequencing - we were told it was like a hidden disability...and I have to say it is something most teachers don't seem to get.
OT is working with help with this and seeing huge improvement, but when I get feedback from the teachers and it is obvious they just don't get it, I feel like screaming. Like on his IEP they want him to join in class discussions - DS dyspraxia effects his expressive language....can't remember all numbers from speech assessment, but on 80th percentile for receptive language and vocal, but expressive is at the other end...problem is putting the words and ideas together in a sentence....must be hugely frustrating for him. But because he isn't doing this - they assume he is learning nothing, when in fact, he is coming home and talking to us about it (always has talked more to us, than in other situations)
So tell me those of you with older children - please please please tell me all this hard work is not in vain, and it will get better for him (and I can maybe worry a little less)
DH husband tells me I worry too much. OT tells me DS progress has been rapid, school has said he is doing better than expected (but then raise every area where they have concerns), but it all doesn't seem to be enough....
I suppose I want him to be accepted for where he is, and then work from there, rather than comparing to children who don't have issues. AIBU?

[Ineedalife]

I agree that you would be less stressed if you didnt compare but it isnt helping that school keep telling you about the things he finds difficult.

Maybe that is the difference between state and indy schools. At many state schools you get virtually no input about how your child is doing.

Maturity can help, with some issues and all the extra that you are doing sounds really good.

I wont say try not to worry but try to get a break from it occasionally.

Be kind to yourself

[mrslaughan]

Thanks Ineedalife - I have actually decided this morning (I have been thinking about it for awhile) that I need to get back into the workforce, used to have a very high powered career before I had kids, then stopped. I don't want high powered at the mo, but something to give me something other to think about.
I have too much time to worry.

I think the thing that is worrying me today, is this morning for the first time in 2 terms we had tears saying he didn't want to go to school - I think because its swimming today. He loves the water, but finds freestyle hard, and he will be comparing himself to the other boys. By the time we got to school he was really happy - but that little wobble has made me wobble

[twitchypalm]

I have just read this after you commented on my thread and what i am reading could be my ds. Can i ask how and when it was picked up that your ds had these problems. Thanks

[mrslaughan]

he has always struggled at school - and has been a completely diff boy at school than at home with us. just before xmas we decided enough was enough and elected to do a private multi disciplinary screening.
he was always in trouble at school, but hates getting into trouble, and we couldn't understand why he couldn't stop himself, we were giving him a hard time about it but could see his self esteem ebbing away.
Anyway we were very fortunate I think with the team we went with esp the physio, OT and SALT (though she may be a speech and language pathologist). It has made things so much better for him, but unfortunately there is no magic bullet - I think that is what I struggle with.
I think the reason we were so lucky with the team is that DS Gross motor is actually above average (just) - so he doesn't straight away make people think about dyspraxia. His fine motor skills are however disastrous and even down to the fine motor required for speech. But the big thing is the motor planning and sequencing.
Since therapy started and is targeted - (started about march) - he can now ride a bike - two wheeler, goes mountian biking with his dad, can horse ride, and is starting to get freestyle.
But it is not just the OT - we also do alot of other stuff, though I do think his OT walks on water