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Should we tell the new pre school

(5 Posts)
seacloud Wed 24-Oct-12 12:28:42

We're in the process of waiting for our referral to come through to c specialists re DS 3yrs 9 months. Its looking like he is on the ASD.

He is having settling in at a pre school at the moment: He appears to really really like it and I feel the structure and more caring nature will help him.

Thi is only his 2nd full session this am as I pulled him out of his other nursery as he's started wetting himself, pooing himself, and he was being bullied and being called poo baby etc. ( There's more but am too upset to repeat what has transpired)

The other nursery were never told as the referral only happened in the last few weeks and as we pulled him out he stayed at home a bit to work on his self esteem again)
The new nursery manager is really lovely and was really caring when I xplained about keeping an eye on him as he's been nervous about going to the toilet by himself - thankfully they don't as they have set times when they all go together as well as when they need to. It turns out that he was being picked on in the toilets, had his trousers pulled down and obviously laughed at when he pooed himself, the list is endless.

My question is do I tell the new pre school that he has a referral to see a developmental paediatrician?

Any thoughts would be helpful thank u

zzzzz Wed 24-Oct-12 12:39:57

Yes. Say you have some concerns about his development and so you've decided to see a peadiatrician about it.

Ask them if they have seen anything that you should tell the Dr..

I would tell them that he was picked on at the last nursery but so much happier with them.

seacloud Wed 24-Oct-12 13:29:45

oh thank you, i just needed someone else to help me as dh is so pro er on the side of caution.
x x x

Inaflap Wed 24-Oct-12 15:08:15

Yes. They will notice that there is something quirky going on and it will save them a lot of time and effort and concern if they know up front. They can also put things in place such as maketon or other symbols to help him.

zzzzz Wed 24-Oct-12 15:24:33

Reassure your Dh that they are far more likely to under diagnose than over.

That if ds is struggling a bit now and makes up ground everyone just says the parents were over anxious he's fine.

That if you get all the way through the dx process and they dx and you don't like it, you can refuse dx at that point take all the reports and recommendations and carry on your merry way.

That they cannot divulge any details to school/anyone unless you sign to say so.

That nursery have to keep ds unless he is hurting other children or stopping them learning or making no progress at all over years.

That my ds who is overtly different managed British prep school to 7.

There are lots of things you can do to help and support your son. This is a fabulous board for quick answers to practical problems. Everything from potty training to Tribunals and some of the posters are funny too. What's not to love?

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