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Not using the toliet in school

(5 Posts)
Gorta Wed 17-Oct-12 19:43:32

Hi,
I know this isn't the most serious issue in the world.My dd has access to a special needs assistant whose role is to look after care needs. My dd has language difficulties dyspraxia and spd. She will not use the toliet in school unless prompted by the sna(I'm in Ireland). She hasn't yet used the toliet in her classroom since starting this new school year. I had to collect her today from school because she had a pain in her tummy. I asked her sna had she gone to the toliet I was given a blank look. I had written in her communication copy about her toliet ing issues but it hadn't been read. I am sick to the teeth of being treated as an over anxious mum. I think this is a basic life skill or should I pick my battles? Getting the school new teacher, new resource teacher and sna to read her assessment reports has already worn me down.
Any thoughts?

madwomanintheattic Wed 17-Oct-12 20:09:32

Does she self-toilet at home, or do you have set times that you remind her?

It is worth making it a routine at school if she doesn't recognize 'need'. So at morning break, after lunch and before home time would do for starters.

If she recognizes need but can't articulate, she needs a sign or a laminated card to show the TA when she wants to go.

Important to fix this now. Either by toilet timing, or her instigating a toilet trip using a sign or symbol. (Ds had a red card he could put n his desk and go - he didn't need to say anything.)

whatthewhatthebleep Wed 17-Oct-12 20:12:44

do you have a daily record/diary being used?...this might be a way of maintaining vigilance of the staff around your DD??....

It does seem rather ridiculous that you need to pointout her basic need to be prompted for using the loo...you'd think they would be checking in with her and offering this periodically to her...or even just making a trip to the loo on a regular enough basis...

I understand your frustration...my DS chose to use a bucket in the hallway a few times because he had trouble communicating his needs and wasn't being asked or guided....it was quite funny when they had caught on to this mysterious issue and couldn't say a thing about fault or blame when they had overlooked things in the first place hahahahaha...mad isn't it!!

Gorta Wed 17-Oct-12 21:18:05

Hi,
Thanks a million for the replies. It is assuring to know it is not just me. My dd does self toliet at home. She was assessed by a educational psychologist in school this year. She recognised major social anxiety issues at school but not at home. The school and I both filled in an adaptive behaviour form. The psychologist thought this stems from her disordered language development. She is scared to use the toliet at school and needs to be brought. She won't ask for help either in class any suggestions? I would really appreciate them. I don't have any confidence in how the school are meeting her needs. My dd is very passive and easily ignored. The teacher or sna do not record in her communication copy. I just get a red tick or great idea then it is ignored. I have had three meeting so far with the school and I have brought in her Occupational Therapist to explain her needs. I rang the psychologist at the schools recommendation for an assistive technology recommendation and she wrote a letter to the principle and included the line I look forward to working with you and your staff in monitoring Aishling progress during the year. I'm hoping it will make them pull up their socks. She had 6 hours per day one to one support last year and now the sna is working with 4 children in the same class. She barely gets a look in. Her resource time was scheduled for the last class of the day. I manged to get it changed to second last class. It is heartbreaking as she was doing so well. Between us she definitely has asd traits and I wouldn't be surprised if she was diagnosed asd as she gets older.

whatthewhatthebleep Wed 17-Oct-12 22:06:23

I'd be emailing them all, bringing all your concerns and questions to them all. Request a meeting at School for review asap

Sounds like things are going backwards instead of forwards for your DD. It's only bound to escalate her anxieties and create huge barriers to her learning as a result....

Good luck smile

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