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Excluded (sent home for the rest of the day) 3 times this week - yr 1

(20 Posts)
pinkandsparklytoo Fri 12-Oct-12 21:36:26

DS is 5 and in year 1. He is not settling in well and has been sent home three times this week for hitting the TA. It's the school's policy to send children home for hitting staff members. Clearly it is not working for him. They have called me in for a meeting about it on Monday with the headteacher and his reception teacher who is also the behaviour co-ordinator. Yesterday I had a review with the school's SENCO which was just going over his IEP for this term. I posted a thread here which was about some earlier exclusions. Today was the shortest amount of time he has been at school for, sent home before I even really got him into the classroom.

coff33pot Fri 12-Oct-12 21:52:08

When you go to the meeting on Monday say you are going to refuse to take him home.

Are you getting an official letter stating the reasons for his exclusion?

Does he have a statement of needs?

I have tried to read some of your other thread but not all so forgive me if I am repeating others or got wrong end of stick so to speak but.....

Has he been assessed by a developmental peadiatrician before? or an Occupational Therapist?

I am thinking sensory issues with noise and crowds that is possibly making him kick off. Also the hair cutting business on your other thread. DS cannot stand having his cut as it bites him? due to tactile issues. Things like this can be remedied so dont panick but he could do with an assessment by the sounds of it by a proffessional to rule anything out. smile

Also no it isnt going to do any good excluding him for hitting as soon as he walks in the door and I suspect it is going to be a regular thing because by now your DS has possibly worked out if he hits Mum can take him home smile Bad behaviour can bring results for a child that doesnt want to be in school if you see what I mean. Also to a child of that age removing them from the scene of the crime so to speak is like transporting them to another world and so they forget what it was they had done and its a day off in their comfort zone x

I would look into insisting on a letter and asking to see if all the exclusions are logged if not they are illegal exclusions and you can refuse to collect.

Plus if he needs a statement or extra support these letters will only add back up that the school is failing to meet his needs at present and perhaps help to get him the extra support smile

pinkandsparklytoo Fri 12-Oct-12 22:12:44

Thank you for replying. I didn't get a letter today as the ht didn't have enough time to print one off. I have had one most of the other times, stating the reason as physical assault against an adult. He doesn't have a statement of needs, I asked the SENCO yesterday whether she thinks he should be assessed and she said they don't like to label children this early on. He hasn't been assessed by anyone but has been observed by an ep in January and again on Tuesday. We are waiting for the report to come back from that.

Today when we got to school it took me 20/25 minutes to get him to go inside. The teachers knew he was there but it was up to me to calm him down and get him to go in. He spent that time running around the garden, playing on equipment and playing chasing games with another sn boy who was out there with his ta. My DS went inside when this other boy went in, about 20 past 9, and headed straight to the computer to play it. The rest of the class and the teacher were at Assembly. The ta said he couldn't go on the computer and he hit out. The reception teacher was called, we had a chat, went to the ht office had another chat then went home.

coff33pot Fri 12-Oct-12 22:38:50

From the angle I am looking at it your DS is having a real hard deal. He is struggling and he shouldnt be left in this state. (by the school I mean smile)

He may hate assembly I know my ds did and would only settle if he was left on his own in the class first.

EPs cant diagnose anything, they can suggest behaviour strategies or could hint at something from past experiences of assessing other children.

Your DS is being excluded because he is unhappy. Either he just wants out and this is the way he can get home or he is trying to tell them he doesnt like it there and cant cope. Read between the lines rather than look at the letter showing assault. What you are really interested in is WHY he is hitting out.

Keep a diary going of everything and anything you find concerning. One for home and one for school issues. Tell school you are taking this very seriously indeed and is it possible for a home/school book to be started as you are seeking further proffesional help and the more records of what is going on the better understanding of his needs will form.

If an EP has been called in then he must be on School Action Plus? which is one step away from a statement request (I know things are changing but at present this stands)

I would in all honesty apply for a statement yourself. This is nothing to do with "labeling" at all. Its easy to apply and the site called IPSEA has a template to start you off and we can all help here with the rest. smile

In the meatime take a visit to your GP and show him all the letters, show him the EP report when it comes and tell him you have serious concerns about his development and would like to rule things out to put your mind at ease by having a referral to a developmental peadiatrician.

This will do no harm as if there are no concerns and you believe that they will tell you if not they will refer you to someone who can further assess and stop this school ignoring your sons needs and just excluding him because they dont know what to do next.

Sorry this sounds dictatorial but I would go by your own instincts than follow a schools any day x

Zobow Fri 12-Oct-12 22:45:00

My ds is also in year 1 and only attends for an hour and a half a day! He has been on a psp since Nov 2011. I know exactly how it feels. Suggest a home school diary I found this really helps and if you go down the statement road you can always submit parts of it for evidence. Make sure you get official letters it will all help for evidence as well. X

pinkandsparklytoo Fri 12-Oct-12 22:51:44

Ds does hate assembly. He hates having to stay still. He doesn't like being told what to do and is struggling with the change between recpetion where he can do what he wants and year 1 where he can't always do that. He has a special place he can go to in the classroom, and two in the playground. Every time he hits out the bc comes up with somthing to stop him hitting in that situation but it doesn't prevent it next time. They are struggling to find out what the triggers are as it occurs from nowhere. The ht said that at the meeting on Monday we will try to find things to help him be at school. They said if it doesn't work and he keeps hitting they will have to put him on a PSP which will mean doing half days at school. If that doesn't work they will have to permanently exclude him and she doesn't want to have to do that.

AgnesDiPesto Fri 12-Oct-12 23:08:49

Are the school accessing the behaviour support team?
Look on the council website - find the details of behaviour support team (usually a base at one primary school and specialist teacher goes out to other schools on outreach). Take their details to the school on Monday and tell them to ring them.
Is info on IPSEA website where exclusions are due to unmet SEN
Apply for a statement.
Tell the SEN Officer they have a duty to provide your son with a full-time education and as the school are seemingly unable provide this you will require them to sort out a home tutor to make up the hours.
Report on Local Government Ombudsman website 'out of school out of mind' talks about what councils are expected to do.
The Government publishes LA's exclusion figures (you can access data for your LA on Dept for Education statistics page) so most LAs try and keep exclusions down so should push the school to put in support
Parent partnership service can sometime be useful for liaising between school and LA
SEN officer / Parent Partnership can also tell you how much support e.g. hours of 1:1 the school is expected to put in without a statement
Tell the school you will need a TA or teacher to meet you in the playground and help get your child into school. It is your responsibility to get him to school, getting him into the classroom after the bell has rung is their responsibility

AgnesDiPesto Fri 12-Oct-12 23:10:42

Whats a PSP? Are you not in England if so my advice may not be right!

pinkandsparklytoo Fri 12-Oct-12 23:16:01

The PSP is a personal support plan. I did ask through the door if someone could come get him but they said they couldnt as he wasn't calm enough. I don't know how I was meant to calm him down, I also had my 1yo Ds with me.

CatWantsPeopleFood Sat 13-Oct-12 11:54:11

Hi Pink, I don't have any useful advice to offer but I have read this and your previous thread and wanted to say I have been experiencing some similar issues with my DD. She is in year 2 now and in addition to the official exclusions she has also been sent home several times for other minor stuff ( like apprently being ill though totally fine once at home, most recently she was sent home because of an itchy arm!) which I am now starting to think have been unofficial exclusions in disguise.

I am of the opinion that external exclusions for such young children is not at all beneficially and does nothing to address the cause of their problems. The behaviour support team are now working with my DD in school and have almost immediatley identified several triggers for her behaviour. Many of these I had previously told the school about but I was dismissed as a bad parent trying to make excuses for a naughty child, but hopefully now I have a professional to back me up they may start to take some notice. They have even suggested that the school staff have caused some of DD's extreme behaviour due to the way they treat her!

I would recommend you ask the school to get the behaviour support team in to work with your DS also, to work on trying to prevent the behaviour problems rather than threatening him with permanent exclusion which really isn't helpful at all.

pinkandsparklytoo Sat 13-Oct-12 12:14:28

He is only 5 1/2 and I think he is starting to figure that he just needs to hit a teacher and he can come home. He doesn't get to do anything fun when he comes home but he just doesn't like being at school anymore. He says he doesn't like his ta but I think it is more of the case that he doesn't like that she makes him do things he doesn't want to.

Veritate Sat 13-Oct-12 12:55:16

Putting him onto half days is illegal unless they are putting something else in place for the rest of the day. I agree, if they can't keep him in school that is clear evidence that they aren't meeting his needs and you should ask for statutory assessment.

coff33pot Sat 13-Oct-12 13:24:22

Ok so call in behaviour support for this meeting. Think about when he was at his happiest when at school and ask the school to rewind back to there and gradually integrate him back if that makes sense.

Simple things they can try are sitting him to the front with everyone else behind him to lessen distraction. Giving him short breaks for excercise or heavy muscle work like pushing the book trolley, sweeping with the big broom etc (special jobs as far as he is concerned for special stickers) and bringing him back to class to break up the lesson.

Perhaps starting with avoiding assembly so that he has quiet wind down to the start of the day with his TA before everyone comes into the class room.

Give him a reward chart and show him for every "job" (lesson) he participates in he earns a reward sticker towards his own free time choice?

Give him a chill out area out of the class room in a quiet area where he can ask to go. Dont use it as a time out but a time in that earns him a reward for using this space rather than hitting?

And above all STOP sending him home as it serves no purpose and will only escalate matters and he will possibly carry on hitting or worse.

There are a lot of things they can do to help if they want to but I feel you need to start a statement rolling as without it what ever support you arrange they can take away at a whim.

Triggles Sat 13-Oct-12 13:29:15

You need to insist on paperwork each and every time he is sent home. Paper trails are important. It also makes it very clear to the HT that you are keeping documentation (keeps HT on their toes IMO).

Apply for statement. Do NOT wait for the school.

personally I would point out to them that they are not meeting his needs and that you need them to put more support in place for him.

greyhares Sat 13-Oct-12 14:37:17

Similar happened to my ds and the LA said that he could be placed on a part-time timetable as part of a PSP to deal with challenging behaviour. There needs to be a specified end date though that you agree with. If you are not happy with this though you can refuse and they will have to try other strategies.

bigTillyMint Sat 13-Oct-12 15:01:48

Hi pink smile I'm a behaviour specialist teacher and it sounds like school is making him feel very anxious. How was he last year and how is he at home?

pinkandsparklytoo Sat 13-Oct-12 22:17:29

Yes the behaviour coordinator at the school says he thinks he is anxious. Apparently they don't want to send him home but it is the school policy for hitting teachers so they have to. They agree it doesn't work. Last year he was sent home twice at the start of the first term of reception but he adjusted to that eventually. The bc was hoping that he would settle down by half term but it doesn't seem to be happening yet, it is just getting worse.
I asked the teacher if she had a tent he could go in so it was private which she did, but she only put it up for the first day after I asked. He doesn't sit on the carpet with the other children at the start of the day . I don't know about other times of the day, when I pick him up they only tell me if he has had a good day or not.

coff33pot Sun 14-Oct-12 00:15:51

This is only a suggestion but if you have a behaviour coordinator there already then it should be easy to call in a behaviour specialist? If he has an EP assessment then profs are involved anyhow.

Before this meeting with school write down a list of questions you have in bullet point form. It will help you keep on track and you won't forget. Also write a list of ideas. Perhaps add some that help at home that they may be able to implement at school. Ask For the tent back as a permanent fixture or somewhere else quiet.

I can understand them expecting him to settle after a few weeks but tbh each year he goes up the more demands are being put on him bless him.

School policies can be changed for children that are having a hard time if it.

It annoys me as it reminds me of the last school who said ds must comply and conform to the ways rules and school policy. A statement said entirely different I can assure you.

coff33pot Sun 14-Oct-12 00:19:03

after the meeting send an email with a "just to clarify" polite air to it going over what was agreed or not agreed. and ask for an acknowledgement that you understood everything or could they explain further. This is a good paper trail start off incase they don't follow through with their promises x

bigTillyMint Sun 14-Oct-12 07:41:22

Hi again. I have just scanned your other thread too.

I agree with coff33pot - all good advice. And yes, the school should be trying to make "reasonable adjustments" to accommodate your DS - a tent sounds like a very simple reasonable adjustment. From what you have said, it sounds like the school have other children who need support and have both a behaviour coordinator (never heard of that one before!) and a SENCO - they should be meeting with you to make a plan. It is nearly half-term and it doesn't look like he is suddenly just magically going to settle.

As your DS has been sent home several times now, and is obviously struggling with changes and new demands being placed on him, I think the school ought to be exploring what is at the heart of his difficulties at school. It does sound like he is showing some ASD-type behaviours which may not be so obvious at home as home. This needs investigating further, for your DS's sake. It is not about "labelling" it is about identifying his needs so that they can meet them.

This situation can be turned around with the right approach from the school!

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