Yesterday was at a course run by my ds's school for boosting self esteem. We were discussing emotions and moved on to the topic of anger. We were all asked about how our dcs dealt with anger starting with me. I advised quite honestly that my ds suffered from bouts of anger often brought on by frustration (most probably due to his differences and the fact that be is becoming slightly aware that he is not able to do things always like everyone else can). Also advised on our coping methods.
Next woman similar and then on to the next man - who I don't like now. He replied ' My dcs don't get angry because they live in a calm house. If you live in a calm environment your dcs won't get angry!'. - Ggrrrr!
Everyone questioned after.of course then said 'oh my dcs don't get angry ever!'
Actually if specialist teaching was available to my child (eg ABA for high functioning kids, not caring carrot cobbled together eclectic crap) I'd grab it with both hands and never look back.
All that's on offer for "kids in the middle" is often being babysat in mainstream, not taught. To get any more than this takes real blood, sweat and tears for our kids.
There are a very few independent schools for dyslexics, ADHD, HFA etc around -trouble is the average fees charged would mean there would be a revolt if all SN kids were migrated to similar en masse, by the same tax payers that currently moan about our children's presence in mainstream.
That man's a complete idiot. His children are effectively being taught to deny their own emotions, likely to raise their risk of developing severe relationship problems, and mental health issues in later life. Clinical depression etc are not to be sniffed at, neither is DV etc. Every human on the planet feels anger and the point of the discussion was to discuss how teach children to handle it in a healthy manner. You can't fix stupid, so don't fret.
In 2o years you'll probably be the one laughing, as his kids dive off the rails.
I just believe some people are smug/opinionated whether they be parents of NT or SN. I am both a NT and SN parent depending which school I am at. DD school know she may be late due to DS2 transport, on one occasion a lady with a DD who has cp sniped at me about being late even though I was driving while they were late because they walked even with her DD disability. She does not know me and I could not be bothered to put her straight.
Why was this man at the training course? His kids don't get angry yeah, right . But he must have some concerns over their self esteem or why bother to go? Wonder if it has anything to do with having a smug, passive aggressive arsehole for a father?
Recently a friend posted on facebook about how her son (y2) had been bitten at school, and she didn't know animals attended the school. All the comments in reply were horrified that a human child could bite, and they must be feral, or 'dragged up'. I wish my kid was the one that was occasionally getting bitten, rather than the biter. But I suppose that's my fault for making her sleep in the garden.
DS school and myself had an arrangement that he started 10 mins after everybody else due to sensory overload,however 1 women caught me on a bad morning and decided to lecture me on time keeping! I'm usually nice ish lol but the words just flowed out " look witch if I wanted advice from someone I'd ask and I'm not asking so jog on and mind your own business" I didn't realise the HT was behind me but when I got home she phoned me to tell me how her and all the teachers were jealous has they had put up with her spouting advice to everyone all the time. I became a hero cos she actually started to engage her brain before speaking to all the other SN mummy's who were having a difficult time
He was being aggressive, but he also showed very clearly how very ignorant he is. He has experienced a very blinkered vie of life if he truly believes that neurological problems can b solved by calm environments.
A fine candidate for this weeks carrot I would say.