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Toileting advice needed

(19 Posts)
mumgoingcrazy Tue 09-Oct-12 19:57:57

DD2 is 5.4yrs GDD, ASD traits, almost certainly dyspraxic but no formal dx.

She is finally dry in the day and can take herself to the toilet which is a massive breakthrough for her.

My issue is that she doesn't poo on the loo. Since July she has done 5 on the loo, the rest is done in her pull up at night. Historically this is when she has always gone, I think her bowel is just trained to go after bath. The ones she has done on the loo are when we have caught her in the act (got the poo face) and we have scooped her up and put her on the loo, so not her doing at all.

We have tried everything reward wise from sticker charts to a chocolate coin as soon as she's done it, we are also very over the top jumping up and down praising her and she's really proud of herself.

I think we are years off being dry at night, but I really want to crack the poo thing. She's awake when she does it, it's always 5 minutes after we've finished stories etc so why not go to the loo? she knows what it's all about.

Any tips would be gratefully received. TIA

mumgoingcrazy Wed 10-Oct-12 14:45:41


TirednessKills Wed 10-Oct-12 15:47:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

devientenigma Wed 10-Oct-12 15:56:30


Do you think the bath is making it easier for her to go?

How is she with wiping? (thinking of her sensory issues and this is my battle with DS)

Rather than wait for her to ask, you take her after the story, let her know your waiting till it's done.

Why does she prefer the pull up to the toilet for this?

sorry not much x

magso Wed 10-Oct-12 16:05:45

We transferred to story to the loo too. Had to get ds comfy (bath cushion to lean against, stool for feet, and nice and warm. Got there in the end.

mumgoingcrazy Thu 11-Oct-12 12:23:36

Thank you all.

I guess we could do a story on the toilet, it's worth a try. I'll seek out something comfy for her. also a good idea to take her to the loo after story and tell her we are waiting until she's done the deed. I'll give both a go.

I think maybe the bath is making her go, it's warm and she's relaxed it obviously triggers something. She doesn't do wiping yet, we've only just mastered weeing on the loo. I've no idea why she prefers a pull up for this, I think it's just something she's always done.

Thank you for these tips I'll give it a try.

TirednessKills Thu 11-Oct-12 14:08:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumgoingcrazy Thu 11-Oct-12 14:25:16

Thanks tiredness kills fingers crossed that's the case for us too as we've got a long way to go with this.

devientenigma Thu 11-Oct-12 17:59:44

lol the wiping thing I was gonna pick your brains on, we can't wipe, won't wipe and won't let me either and he's nearly 12.

mumgoingcrazy Fri 12-Oct-12 13:57:38

Not even attempted wiping yet, we're just so glad we're out of nappies in the day. When you find a way let me know grin x

mumgoingcrazy Fri 12-Oct-12 20:54:57

Well she sat on the loo for over an hour after bath tonight, we read stories, she did her reading etc had a lovely time but no poo. Back to bed and within 5 minutes had done it in her pull up. Grrrrrrr. Will try again tomorrow.

Jerbil Fri 12-Oct-12 21:08:27

I know how you feel. Though mine doesn't have the same issue of preference to pull-ups just so constipated he sat on toilet for 45 mins tonight after soiling today at school. That's ds1(6)!

Ds2 (3) soiled himself when we were out eating this evening. Doh! Queue for the bath lol!!!

Ds1 is the one with the main issues. We've had all kinds of advice. Best one for s has been to have him try three times a day for a no 2. He has to sit and try. Regardless of the outcome he gets a reward. It reduces the number of times he soils. I don't think it's that uncommon to have a child who prefers the pull ups etc. from conversations I've had.

Shot in the dark here... St on the toilet with the pull up on, do a gradual step?

Twowillbefine Fri 12-Oct-12 21:10:33

Sorry not great thoughts but another in a similar boat. DS1 is nearly 6, ASD and dry during day and night. But will only poo into a nappy. He'll sit on the toilet to do it but can't be persuaded to do the deed without a nappy. I know I'm meant to cut it away or something but never really got how to do that. We cracked dry at night in the end simply because he said "no more night time nappy" and I leapt on it with alacrity! So really I'm just going with waiting until he's ready. Like TirednessKills maybe we're lucky that he goes at about the same time and not during school hours (or keeps it in).

My words of advice (for what they're worth): try to persuade her to sit on the toilet in the nappy first? But don't stress it smile.

mumgoingcrazy Fri 12-Oct-12 21:19:09

A good idea Jerbil, she was definately trying to go, had her poo face on etc so she was trying so maybe I should reward her for that even though there was no result.

TWBF I'll try that tomorrow night, I'll see if she'll sit on the loo in her nappy.

I'm wondering if it's being in her room on her bed that she likes, where she's most relaxed rather than the pull up itself. Clutching at straws now!

Thanks all for the helpful tips.

Jerbil Sun 14-Oct-12 22:53:18

Great news. lets hope its a start. dont be shocked if theres some steps backwards as these clever little people always like to test us.

Any little step should be rewarded. Reward yourself too. I find it helps! :-)

mumgoingcrazy Mon 15-Oct-12 14:48:05

I'm so excited & had to share. Dd2 did one on the loo last night!!! I never thought in a million years that could make me so happy. Loads of praise & rewards so fingers crossed it wasn't a one off. Thank you all for the great advise x

magso Mon 15-Oct-12 15:40:47

Well done littleMGC!

mumgoingcrazy Wed 17-Oct-12 20:12:46

Thanks, looks like it was a one off, she's not done another one since sad

magso Wed 17-Oct-12 22:31:06

Don't get dispondant. It may take a while for everything to come together.

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