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calling all parents of ADHD children

(6 Posts)
Ninjahobbit Mon 01-Oct-12 11:44:52

My DS who has just started senior school and just turned 12 is struggling alot with his Anger, am after any advice on how to manage this with him and how to support him.

He is struggling with the changes of school and I am working with the school on this but my DS has commented a few times recently that he gets angry but doesnt want to let it out or hit anyone.

Does/has anyone else out there struggled and how did you all cope, what did you find helped them release the anger. I dont want to go down the route of martial arts/boxing as I feel he may then use these on a bad day.

coff33pot Mon 01-Oct-12 12:25:15

ds is 7 so not experiencing seniors yet but does have anger issues when stressed. At home we have roller blades, pogo sticks, pillows to thump, or it's to the park so he can charge around by himself. He also learnt to shut off when angry by putting his headphones on and listening to music.

School he is allowed his music, has regular breaks plus playtime which is not withdrawn as a consequence I might add. Heavy muscle work is important followed by calming time after to balance out to cope with the lessons.

crazygal Mon 01-Oct-12 14:16:57

Hello there
my ds is 8 and has alot of anger aswell...
We have him playing the drums...we believe this really helps him
plus he has just started cross country, and as coff33pot has mentioned we have a pillow too,not sure if yours is a little old for this idea though,we give ds a plain white pillow where he can use felt tips to write on it what he pleases when he is angry....its not the nicest or reads,but he really likes to do that,
Its very hard though,and at times we cant cope either,
and as you have said,the karate route we tried once and ds was almost excluded for trying his new 'thing' out!
Its very hard,i hope you find something for him.
Has he said what he would like to do?

zzzzz Mon 01-Oct-12 17:08:46

I think drums are ideal.

streakybacon Tue 02-Oct-12 09:52:42

Personally, I'd go right back to the root of the problem and find out what's making him angry at school and see if there's any way you can help with that.

There are lots of great suggestions for what he might do to relieve his anger once he gets home, but ideally he needs to have coping strategies during the day so that it doesn't overspill into school life.

I worked with my son on recognising his anger, triggers, practical strategies etc so that he can now prevent the anger rising in the first place. He hasn't lost his temper for over two years now.

I hope you can find some solutions. It must be very worrying for him and you.

Ninjahobbit Tue 02-Oct-12 17:33:52

thanks for the replies

Unfortunatly I dont think my sanity can handle drums in my house, also the 'outside' activities are harder at his age as he does get targeted by others and feels too old for the park ya never too old for the park right?.

I have however located a small 'punch bag' similar to what boxers use, if he knows he can punch this when he is angry that might help, going to give it a try and its not him learning boxing skills etc

I have also contacted an organisation called funability which is local to me and between us we are trying to find a way of helping my DS to release his negative energy.

In regards to the root of the problem, we know exactly what is causing him his angry feelings and it is the move to senior school. Myself and school are working hard with my DS to make things as smooth as possible and helping him with all the changes going on {sorry probably should have mentioned that in my original post}. This doesnt stop him having the angry feelings even though he knows what the triggers are, we are currently trying to find the practical stratergies, so any suggestions would be most welcome.

Hopefully I will also reach the place where he can prevent the anger rising smile

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