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ASD - how accepting is your church?(10 Posts)
Mine is fab!!! Ds is just 5 and we have been taking him on and off since he was born, he hasn't always coped well and we often had to take him out when it got too much for him - we were always made to feel welcome though.
For the last six months he has been great - he likes to sit at the very font in the seat 2 from the door to the side room / kitchen (this is now his seat). We always sit there and it's fab, he is so much happier at the front rather than at the back.
Yesterday the youth were taking the service and there was a lot of noise, modern songs, loud drums, sketches etc and ds coped with the whole thing. He enjoyed it so much that after each song he clapped and shouted "well done" "amazing" - it was really funny and everyone accepts his little outbursts and see them as progress because he was non verbal just over a year age!
I do wish I could find a way to stop him shouting "wake up" durning the prayers but I'm sure God has a sense of humour!!!
where is your church?
we are new at ours no-one has said anything... yet...
I'm in South Wales, it's a Baptist church, quite modern and the congregation is mostly families, teens and children - over 60's are in the minority.
I should add that the church are all doing an autism awareness scheme that is running here in Wales and have close links with a local special school. Two of the members work in special schools, there are a few TAs working in mainstream with children who have additional needs and one family respite foster a child with ASD. All of this adds to the supportive atmosphere and ds is accepted as he is.
I would say it has been quite difficult ..but that is from our point of view as embarassed parents...when ds2 who is apparently NT (he has Asperger's) behaves worse than some of the four year olds there (fidgeting, running off, refusing to stand up and sit down at right points, asking loudly when it is over, pushing through the queue for communion etc. He is 10, and sometimes we have made the choice to take him to the park and not go to Mass with him, (I would take the two other kids to Mass, my husband is not Catholic so he stays with ds2)
However, he absolutely loves Children's Liturgy, a sort of Sunday School, so he participates fully in that, all the adult attention he gets there, and behaved very well during the Communion classes when he was 7/8. I'm noticing he is more and more at home during church, and although he make weird noises and gestures, I think he really enjoys the structured setting, and seeing his school friends there.
How much he understands is another matter, but I would like to think he is very welcome and apreciated for his character! Sometimes I feel his prescence has made me much less judgemental of other families with small children who are misbehaving, and much more aware of how much help we need to get through our daily life, grace in fact....
Great to hear your church is so understanding. I have just taken on the children's work at ours so want to improve the experience for all children incl those with ASD. FWIW we think DS is AS, and church accept him just as they accept everybody else. We have other SN children (and adults) as well.
Hi cwtches, we are in South Wales too and my local church is full of the older generation and they don't get ASD!! If you know what I mean! We have stopped going over a year ago because I would come out so stressed it just wasn't a worth it. Are you able to PM me the church.. I am willing to travel 20 miles max if me daughter gets a positive experience and TBH I miss going too. Thanks
'My' church has been great with the boys. I used to feel embarassed that DS1 would be rolling under the pew whilst other children sat nicely, but everybody was always so kind, even before they knew he had ASD that I always felt welcome. He does occasionally interrupt the vicar for clarification of words meanings in the middle of the sermon but he doesn't seem to mind. I think the vicar is slightly more bothered by DS2 who tends to fling himself at him for a hug whenever he sees him. The poor chap never knows where to put himself. But there are a few people now who will happily help me out with one or two of the boys especially when we attend messy church and they get a bit over excited.
I used to go to a lovely baptist church in S. Wales where the leader of the Sunday School was a Senco. She was one of the people who was quite key in pushing me to get a dx for DS1, and was absolutely fab with him.
Ours has been very good since DS was diagnosed. Before that he just looked like a naughty boy with a harassed and incompetent mum. Though in fairness, lots of people were trying to be kind and helpful even then, but I was too embarrassed to accept assistance
Ours is great, but there are four kids with autism so they are used to them.
Not sure on the shouting out in prayers, when someone said "thank for the lovely day" dd2 shouted out "well I haven't"
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