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Looking for a short, smart answer

(23 Posts)
Claw3 Fri 07-Oct-11 07:33:52

SENCO keeps saying ds "has these difficulties only on paper" and every time she says it, im lost for words, without going into a lengthy explanation.

Any ideas on how to reply to this silly comment?

tabulahrasa Fri 07-Oct-11 07:43:02

Ask her to explain to you how a difficulty can only exist on paper, because that's impossible.

Or

Did you mean it to sound like you were saying you think his difficulties are made up?

Claw3 Fri 07-Oct-11 07:49:46

Thanks Tabulahrasa, i think your first suggest is great, i usually try to defend myself with some lengthy explanation, when really she is the one who should be explaining.

Lougle Fri 07-Oct-11 09:41:30

'If they are only on paper, why are you wasting trees? Don't you know the environment is suffering?'

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 07-Oct-11 09:41:54

Yes absolutely. Ask her wtfshe means by that. Just say 'I'm sorry but can you explain what you mean by that? Keep asking her to elaborate and take notes. When she has finished and refuses to go on, look at her confused and ask 'well then, how on earth did they GET on paper?' and look down at your note pad with pen ready. Put the whole lot down in a ledger to her as minutes of the meeting.

Bet she can't explain, and her non-explanation will be useful to you.

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 07-Oct-11 09:43:08

Letter. Ledger? confused

Lougle Fri 07-Oct-11 09:59:07

I must admit, Star, I thought it was impressive to manage to fill a whole ledger with the result of one conversation grin

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 07-Oct-11 10:07:33

Stupid phone.

wasuup3000 Fri 07-Oct-11 10:40:37

"are your teaching qualifications only on paper"?

StarlightMcKenzie Fri 07-Oct-11 10:54:08

Lol. God, I wish Claw coukd say that.

zzzzz Fri 07-Oct-11 10:55:52

I like Star go with the "Can you explain what you mean by that?" approach grin. Everyone seems genuinely terrified of me when I write things down smile.
I have no idea why this works but it does.

FFS what on earth DOES she mean by they are only on paper????? If she's cured your dc hadn't she better fess up now so you can all stop having meetings and she can trot along to write up her paper for some august medical journal......I need toast, she is now also responsible for zzzzz's expanding waistline. angry

TheNinjaGooseIsOnAMission Fri 07-Oct-11 11:38:35

much like star's suggestion, I've taken up a phrase used frequently by our parent partnership lady (who is lovely and supports us!), could you clarify exactly what you mean by that? And a big yes to taking notes, especially if you angle the paper so they can't see what you are writing grin

wasuup grin list of things you would love to say to a professional but aren't brave enough, well me anyway!

lisad123 Fri 07-Oct-11 12:07:13

" I guess thats why autism is classed as a hidden disability" grin

imogengladheart Fri 07-Oct-11 12:16:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

coff33pot Fri 07-Oct-11 18:53:48

When my dad went to pick up ds a while ago the teacher broached him and whispered "I think there is trouble at home"....Dad whispered back "well yes your name is mentioned quite a bit come to think of it"............and walked away grin

ChippingIn Fri 07-Oct-11 18:57:47

coff grin splendid!!! I love your Dad! He was so quick & not wrong footed by a bloody rude teacher - brilliant!!

Yes Claw, go for the 'Can you explain that fucking stupid comment please' Until she's blue in the face - stupid cow.

Claw3 Sat 08-Oct-11 09:13:16

Thanks guys, she actually said it at Tribunal and instead of asking her to explain, i went into a lengthy explanation of why she was wrong.

Looking through my pile of paperwork she actually said it again in reply to the LA, prior to Tribunal too, as an excuse for initially giving ds 20 hours of 1:1 and then removing it. "when ds presented on paper prior to his transfer from x school and the difficulites described on the paperwork 20 hours of TA support were put in place"

Im loving some of the answers grin

Lougle Sat 08-Oct-11 14:06:01

So what she was saying, then, was that the reports justified 20 hours 1:1, but were in fact wrong, because he didn't need it.

Claw3 Sat 08-Oct-11 14:39:23

Yep Lougle that seems to be about the strength of it. Had i known that SENCO was a OT, SALT, EP etc all rolled into one, i wouldnt have bothered getting ds a dx in the first place!

OT report actually says "the extent of ds needs should be assessed and analysed by a qualified professional and not by a teacher whose area of expertise is clearly not the assessment and treatment of motor difficulties"

It is also very worrying that they give ds social skills group, 1:1 SALT (TA), another group for children with motor skill difficulties, while telling SALT, OT, EP etc that ds doesnt have any social skill, speech and communication or motor difficulites!

Lougle Sat 08-Oct-11 15:12:26

Perhaps your actual question needs to be: "So you are refuting the assessment by x number of professionals?"

Claw3 Sat 08-Oct-11 15:22:59

Lougle i think what she is getting at is ds's 'functional ability' ie he has all these difficulties, but they do not impact on his functional ability.

Which is clearly not the case, but then leads to lengthy explanaitons on my part. Ds has been observed in school numerous times, by numerous experts, who have all identified his needs impacting on his functional ability.

tryingtokeepintune Sat 08-Oct-11 20:46:54

Claw, maybe that explains her attitude to the IEPs - they are meant to only exist on paper grin.

Claw3 Sun 09-Oct-11 09:20:44

grin Exactly Tryingtokeep!

Actually i can see why school might be having difficult recognising his difficulties and why he had exactly the same problem at the last school.

A good example is what an EP wrote when working with a partner ds was seemingly cooperative and friendly towards his parnter, but it was evident that he did not want to work from the same page as his partner, he helped his partner to spell words etc, but followed his own agenda and would not be swayed from it, as a result he completed no work. He used procrastination and delaying tactics, instead of cooperating.

Now school see that as ds is good at sharing, turn taking, very considerate and helpful towards his partner.

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