We thankfully? don't have any 'professional's involved, except the school. I have already, in 3 weeks, encountered much of what you say from them though. I thought the school we chose was the right choice. Now not so sure, precisely for these reasons.
The SEN officer assured us our autism advisory teacher was brilliant because 'she could see right inside those autistics heads'. which must explain why in a year she never found the need to actually interact with DS
This thread doesn't give me much hope. We had an appointment with salt recently, tried to explain about recent Asd dx and lack of interest in toys, even used the example of a car and how he uses it like a ball. She then proceeded to try and interact with him using a car! I asked, do you Jane Amy balls or anythig else to get his interest...eh no, just the one toy...wtf.
I was constantly told I should take Ds to more toddler groups, didn't realise that was an all out cure for asd! . I busted a gut, going every fay and he would ignore the group and follow a ball around...
When my DD(6) started special school (for children with autism) the school nurse came out for a home visit. She got on my nerves about a few things but I mentally gave up on her when she said "So your DD must really love Thomas the tank engine". "Ey?" says I, scanning my living room for evidence of Thomas obsession (not a train related anything to be seen). "Our children always love him" she explained. At the time my DD's fave toy was dolls.
Hecate I wonder if you have the autism advisory woman that I have managed to lose when dd moved schools . I can't even remember her name now but she has an AS dd in her mid twenties which you would hope would give her insight and understanding but unfortunately it doesn't appear to have. Have done two ARs now without her input or attendance and have had a far more positive outcome as a result.New school didn't know of her and I "forgot" to mention that she was involved