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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on SN.

first timer needs advice

(13 Posts)
ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 17:48:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 19:14:47

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MangoMonster Wed 05-Oct-11 19:29:02

If she's overwhelmed maybe she needs some more time to adjust. The meeting might help her come to terms with it.

ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 19:37:40

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MangoMonster Wed 05-Oct-11 19:45:06

Post dx is hard, no one helps you. I agree she probably needs to take control to feel better and help him. Just not sure you can help much if she's not ready emotionally. May be just go along to these meetings with her and let her work through it for a while, when she feels more able to cope she will probably seek out advice. You sound like a lovely friend, at least she has you. When people starting using the term special needs to me at first, I switched off... Takes time. Although I understand time might be of the essence.

ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 19:54:47

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MangoMonster Wed 05-Oct-11 20:00:59

I understand your frustrations, I think you're doing everything you can.

Marne Wed 05-Oct-11 20:12:51

Its hard is'nt it, i felt the same as you Leonie after my dd's were diagnosed, i just wanted to do everything i can to get them the help they needed (i guess getting stuck into 'what can i do to help' mode gave me less time to actually think about the dx and get upset about it (although i do have times where it hits home). The sooner she gets him the help he needs the better (the social problems will only get worse).

Hopfully eventually reality will hit and she will see that her ds does have AS and is relying on her to get him what he needs (support at school, help with social situations).

We get the anxiety at night with dd1 and its no fun but we are learning ways to cope with it and ways to relax her.

I'm not sure what else you can do, you are offering advice which she refuses to take, i can see why its frustrating sad.

ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 20:17:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MangoMonster Wed 05-Oct-11 21:18:43

Have to say, I can see what you mean about your experience being detrimental. When i first found out and saw the lengths other parents had to go to to get what they needed, I was very sad and lost. It gets easier though, it's just a whole new world to the one you thought you might have.

ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 21:28:14

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MangoMonster Wed 05-Oct-11 21:38:06

It's a sad fact, no one expects the statement shit when they get a dx... It's a hideous thing to consider when you are still thinking about all the other repercussions. Luckily, I'm not at the statement part yet, hopefully I will be prepared when I am. Your friend must feel completely lost and inept, I know I would.

ArthurPewty Wed 05-Oct-11 22:15:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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