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Has having a child with sn affected your health?

(77 Posts)
Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 13:31:08

There is obviously a lot of stress associated with having a child with sn's. Whether that is dealing with behaviours and needs, dealing with school, statements, tribunals, DLA etc, etc.

Ive just been for a dr appointment, as i havent been able to go the gym (my stress relief) for about a month as i was getting out of breath easily.

The dr did one of those blow into tests and apparently 73% is bad, she has given me asthama medication, ive never suffered with asthama. My weight has also dropped from 60kg to 50 something or the other and she feels lack of nutrients in my red blood cells could be causing my breathing difficulties and i have to go for a blood test to check my sugar levels etc. I also had a chest infection that i wasnt aware of, so now have antibiotics (i put it down to having a cold)

Her conclusion STRESS.

Anyone elses health suffering due to the stress of it all?

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 13:32:07

asthma rather!

silverfrog Tue 13-Sep-11 13:40:53

oh Claw.

I am sorry.

Having dd1 (and to an extent dd2, as she is not-quite NT) has certainly had an impact on my health, both mental and physical.

From not getting to the doctor's when I need to (not often, I am - touch wood - usually healthy, but everyone needs to go sometimes!), or even for regular things like smear tests, dentist check ups etc.

I have recently finished nearly 2 years of dental work, which has been building op over the last 7/8 years (started really when I was pregnant with dd1, as had hyperemesis which really screwed my teeth up), then just couldnot ever go to an appt. have now had 3 teeth out, plus wisdom teeth out too (so 7 in all), an implant in place of one of them, and a load of other fillings/root canals etc.

and I shoudl really be doing somehitng about a couple more, but cannot face it after the last coulpe of years...

what happened with me was (and I suspect it is true of most parents of children with SN) I was pushed to the back of a very long queue. ther eis never enough time when children are small anyway, but add in SN, and the situation is hopeless.

I have never been as unfit or unhealthy as I am now - I am quite truly horrified by how unfit I am. now that both girls are at school, it is my next aim...

siblingrivalry Tue 13-Sep-11 14:00:46

Sorry you are feeling so unwell, Claw -and I can empathise completely.

I often cancel appointments for myself with dentist/GP;etc because I just don't have the physical or mental energy to deal with them.
I am anaemic off and on, because I don't take care of myself. I am also on AD's and most of the time I feel physically and emotionally depleted.

This is also due to a poor sleeping pattern-my mind races when I go to bed.

I find that after dd has a 'bad' spell, I feel ill and it takes me a while to recover!
It's all the extra work and demands on us, isn't it?

Take care of yourself x

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 14:03:57

Thanks Silver, i feel fine in myself just a bit run down, which i put down to the cold i have had for the last 2 weeks. Very true about not getting to the dr when needed, i left it 2 weeks. The only reason i know i have lost weight, is i went for my smear test, 3 years late, a month ago and they weighed me!

Having so much knowledge about behaviour around eating, because of ds, i am then analysing myself, is it that i dont have time or am i trying to control this because i feel so out of control of the rest of my life grin

I cant even remember the last time i went to the dentist!

I have bought myself some nice bubble bath, body scrub and creams and potions and have booked to have my eyebrows done tomorrow, hopefully just the tonic i need to pick myself up and start again.

Have you had a pampering day or even an hour to yourself lately?

silverfrog Tue 13-Sep-11 14:14:27

oh, I have just had a blissful summer, tbh. we had a nanny, so the girls were taken care of (dd1 was understanably stressed, but they were looked after well).

have been havign a fab time with my best friend (in and amongst all the dental operations!). not so much pamper time, but we have been to the theatre, and to some music gigs, and a couple of comedy ones too. mental health much improved smile.

now it's onto the physical health side. I must book a smear (don't think I've had one since before dd2 was born blush), and do something about general fitness. am running a Race for Life run this weekend, which will be more of a Walk for Life, with added stumbling grin

we ought to meet up for that coffee - dd1 not over your way anymore, but I can pop over anytime. ooh, which reminds me, I must PM you about schools.

tallwivglasses Tue 13-Sep-11 14:25:37

Claw3 sad

I think this is a timely reminder for us all to look after ourselves (and do a bit of pampering).

I take blood pressure meds and tried AD's for a while but they made me more tired!

I've been comfort eating (and drinking) too much but on a diet now and I've been smoke-free for 8 months. I reckon feeling fitter and less tired will improve my mental health.

Our kids need us to be healthy and it's so easy to ignore our needs when so many demands are being made of us.

Off to book that overdue dental appointment!

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 14:29:51

Sibling Poor you, its amazing the impact that stress can have isnt it. I have trouble sleeping too, it used to because ds didnt sleep well, but even now his sleeping has improved, mine hasnt!

I thought i was pretty healthy, as i use the gym for stress relief, again its amazing how much your mental and emotional well being affect your physical well being too.

You sound in need of a pamper day or just some you time too x

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 14:34:02

Silver your summer sounds lovely. Oh a race for life, do you need some sponsors? grin @ stumble for life.

Yes a unhealthy coffee and perhaps a doughnut for me, we will have to arrange. Pm about schools? do you have some good ones?

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 14:38:45

Tall, exactly no use to anyone if we run ourselves in the ground, easier said than done though a lot of time.

Well done for giving up smoking, i do smoke, ive been trying to cut down and i have managed to cut right down, just not able to give up totally at the moment.

Giving up is on my to do list along with the dentist. Oh and i need to have my eyes tested, i cant read the small print on the back of packets anymore, i will end up over dosing on all the medication the dr has prescribed!

silverfrog Tue 13-Sep-11 16:08:51

Doughnut sounds good grin

Have sent pm re: school. A bit rambling, sorry - was on phone and wanted to get it sent before school run chaos.

starfishmummy Tue 13-Sep-11 16:10:14

I agree with sibling I think its the not having the time to look after yourself properly or even to get to the drs or dentist easily.

Triggles Tue 13-Sep-11 17:11:09

Definitely my health has suffered - it always seems to take a backseat to everyone and everything else. Absolutely my mental health - the stress is unbelievable sometimes (although most likely pretty believable to everyone on this board LOL). And I have diverticular disease, which is aggravated by stress. And have been anaemic for as long as I can remember. I was given asthma meds, which I took for awhile, but when I started feeling a bit better, I stopped taking them. Too much hassle dealing with appointments and prescription refills. I'm out of pain meds for my diverticular disease as well, but again, too much hassle to deal with it all. I really must get back in and get some of these things sorted. I had a ton of dental work that had to be done, and was finally forced to do it because I had 2 teeth literally crack in half. No choice then!

I agree it's important to take care of ourselves. I was just thinking today that I needed to make time for these things. I will have to make more of an effort. If I don't take care of myself, who will?

lisad123 Tue 13-Sep-11 17:32:21

Yep I'm shattered, have bowel problems and heart ones too sad also get mirgaines
I manage to get out once a week for badminton which is great but that's it, I really don't look after myself blush
Dh has cancer but other than that his pretty healthy and gets to the gym 3 times a week!!

madwomanintheattic Tue 13-Sep-11 17:40:31

it's made me fat. no time to exercise and stressed so eat rubbish. i did get round to having a smear test though, and a full medical a couple of weeks ago. medical has led to some concerns and got to go for more tests on thurs. <sigh> i'm pretty sure it's just because everyone else comes first etc etc, and general levels of stress, but it's pretty scary nonetheless.

i had some major neuro symptoms a couple of years ago (stopped driving etc) which i'm pretty sure were stress-based. bp etc too. i think sometimes your body does start to, er, shout at you a bit if you do overload it. until you listen and make some sort of effort to put the brakes on and slow it down.

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 17:48:30

Thanks for pm Silver, i too sent a rushed reply, im trying to do too many things at once smile

Triggles that is what i will probably do too with the asthma meds, ditch them when they run out and i start to feel better when the antibiotics kick in! I always start off with every intention of doing more socially and making an effort with this, that and the other. I started to do a home degree, i managed about one year of a 4 year course, i just couldnt keep up with it all. At the time trying to write an essay, after ds keeping me up all night and not even having the time to have a bath, something had to give, shame really, it was really interesting.

Lisa Bloody hell, i have nothing to complain about, compared to you. I think we should all go for a spa weekend, but not a healthy one, one where they have 3 course dinners and chocolate and wine, i probably mean a hotel then grin

smugtandemfeederispissedoff Tue 13-Sep-11 17:54:03

I was going to start a similar thread last week! I've been to a Neurologist for migraines - diagnosis stress. A reumatologist for constant neck and back pain - diagnosis stress. A psychiatrist for depression - diagnosis stress. DH has just been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and other mental health stuff. Both of us have now been signed off work from very good jobs. It seems ridiculous we have got in this state. It seems to be so common though by the sounds of this thread. Defo need a spa.

madwomanintheattic Tue 13-Sep-11 17:59:46

oh, i've had neck and upper back pain for years. grin triggered initially by lifting dd2 as she was v delayed and blardy heavy. now compounded by stress. how funny that it's such a normal part of my life i didn't even bother to mention it! grin

ArthurPewty Tue 13-Sep-11 18:07:42

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 18:12:53

Blimey, it sounds like we are all falling apart at the seams grin

Tonight i plan on long soak in a hot bubble bath and i shall scrub myself and apply my cream and come out smelling like a large coconut (knowing my lucky, i will then discover i have a nut allergy!)

I am cooking jerk chicken, one of my favs for dinner and i then plan on an early night.

I have also booked to have my eyebrows threaded tomorrow (she always asks whether i want my top lip done!!, so that will cheer me up no end!

So how do you guys relax and unwind?

ArthurPewty Tue 13-Sep-11 18:18:10

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

smugtandemfeederispissedoff Tue 13-Sep-11 18:23:16

Another one who has forgotten how to relax. I just obsessively look at the internet on my phone.

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 18:27:54

Those are my plans, we will see if i manage them or not! Ds is playing with his older brother on the ps3. Older brothers are a god send, perhaps you should get yourself an 18 year old Leonie?

Claw3 Tue 13-Sep-11 18:29:02

Oops that doesnt sound right, i meant an 18 year old brother to help you!! grin

madwomanintheattic Tue 13-Sep-11 18:33:41

ooo, i dunno claw. the idea of an 18yo for stress relief has some interesting possibilities!

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