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Disastrous hearing test for ds(14 Posts)
Please bear with me as I'm new to all this. My ds is 2 and was dx a few weeks ago with working dx of asd.
We had a hearing test today and he literally took one look at the women and the room and went into melt down much to their surprise. So needless to say, he didn't have the test although I suspect his hearing is ok, just procedure as he is still non verbal. I explained about asd and they said they understood but obviously they didn't have the time to do the test at his pace.
This always happens when he is rushed and feels pressurised, don't blame him after all the horrible appointments he has had in his short life. I felt like a failure yet again though for not beig able to calm him down and get him through the test. Unfortunately I even had tears in my eyes, feel like a dick.
So was wondering if anyone has any tips on helping him in these situations to feel less vulnerable. He just seems to sense when something is expected of him and he's not sure what so he freaks out :-(.
I'm surprised they expected him to. My (not sn) ds has hearing issues (glue ears and grommets) and they didn't get him to manage to do the hearing test until he was 3yo. They tried before, but he just shook his head and refused and nothing I could say (or bribe) made any difference. They said it was quite normal for that age to not want to do it (either noisily or quietly refuse) so they will have seen it all before.
I remember them being really pleased at 3yo when he did some of the test and said he'd done well "considering his age".
The only thing I did do was practice putting the headphones on, and he could listen to music through them.
Thanks for responding. No ear phones involved, that wouldn't have gone well! Just had to stand in a certain area and look at a toy when it made a sound. So I guess it was a reasonable test. He just seems to have a sense about these things and gets anxious.
Please don't feel badly about this. You are not a failure, and anyone would have tears in their eyes under that sort of pressure.
My DS1 is now 7, Dx ASD with a working Dx of PDA.
When he was younger, I struggled to get him to allow any type of procedure to be done.
If it makes you feel any better to hear some stories of disastrous visists, we once went to the baby clinic with DS3 (at about 4 months-they hadn't seen him since the home visits stopped because I couldn't face going!).
I had the baby in a sling, DS2 at about 20 months in a pushchair, and a 3YO DS1 (who ran in rings everywhere).
HV in her infinite wisdom decided they all needed weighing, all in the nude. She suggested DS1 should go first, to show the others what to do. He went absolutely ballistic, screaming, shouting and slamming into things. The other 2 started as well, and so all 3 were screaming in terror. HV kept trying to pull clothes off DS1 or DS2, neither of whom were having any of it.
She then got exasperated and huffily said she'd do the baby. So I removed his nappy and discovered the massive poo he'd been harbouring...and because I'd come out in a panic I had nothing with me.
I said something to the HV like 'I don't think I'll bother doing this again,' thinking she might offer me a crumb of reassurance, but she just looked down her nose at me and said 'No, I don't think you should!' I never got them weighed again, and I spent the rest of the day (probably the rest of the week!) in tears.
There was another visit to have some innoculations. As far as I knew, DS3 needed his, and DS1 needed a booster, but I didn't have the reminder letters. I gave the blue books to the nurse, but DS1 created so badly she ended up repeating one jab he'd already had, and giving him another one he wasn't meant to have! The entire surgery was disrupted then, and a GP came to support. The nurse was in tears and we felt so sorry for her we didn't even think till later what damage these 'extra' jabs might have done to DS1!
And as for the epic drama of the time he lost a bead in his ear...don't get me started. 4 separate hospital visits and a day as an in patient with a general anaesthetic...When a simple pair of tweezers could have done the job!
As he gets older though, it is getting easier.
Oh, and just to put your mind at rest, he has never managed a hearing test, but the doctor did suggest that I stood behind him when he is engrosed in something else and quietly ask if he'd like some chocolate. If he responds, he can hear! . I've used the 'chocolate test' for my next 2 DSs and they all 3 passed!
Please don't worry about this. Have a and relax!
Thank you so much! You have made me feel much better! Couldn't even get him weighed last week or head measured as he obviously thought it was a violation of his human toddler rights! I personally think he's been spending too much time with my cats and their "precious" attitude to any interference! Lol. Lots more appointments to go and it would be lovely if anyone could actually assess his eye sight, weight, development, without ww3, although I understand to him it's frightening. Just wish I was more demanding with professionals and less of a wuss and that they had time! Thanks again though. Have had a large glass and that too has helped!
. The endless round of assessments does stop after a while, honest!
just wanted to say mine had a strop at the hearing test too,,, (he has ASD and LD), they used really freaky puppets that suddenly lit up and danced... as a reward . did not go well
tbh, that test sucks! DD1 who has autism, failed that test 3 times and they told me to prepare that she might be deaf I knew she wasnt, but when she is involved in something there is no distracting that kid!
DS had that done at just over 2 - it was a disaster!!! He gave totally inconsistent results and the consultant gave up!! She did say her gut feeling was that his hearing was fine but couldn't prove it on the results. At the time he was awaiting diagnosis of ASD and now has a confirmed diagnosis of ASD and significant learning difficulties. He had another hearing test about six months later which seemed to go well and he was diagnosed with high frequency hearing loss as a result. I was stunned but they seemed so sure - they did say there would be more tests needed. After I few weeks I phoned his paed for a chat as the diagnosis just didn't sit right - he agreeded we should do another test under sedation (like newborn screening) to check his brain responses to sound etc. Took a while to arrange but it was worth it as his hearing is normal.
It is hard taking them for tests but try not to let it upset you when they don't cooperate!!
Aww bless him! He is only 2 after all! I was going to suggest a picture story if you took photos of the room, reception, any toys there in the waiting room etc maybe photograph a favourite toy in a shop that you would buy for him to play with whilst the test was done? Stick them all in a made up book and tell him a "story" for a few nights well before the event so he knows what he will see what to expect and that he will have a new toy in his hand
Ah, DD once completely lost it at a HV check up when she was about 2, refused to be weighed or measured and wouldn't talk to the scary lady or do anything she asked.
That's my usually meek completely NT DD btw, lol.
2 yr olds aren't compliant even without any reasons for it.
Oh, we had exactly the same problem with my asd son.
Firstly find out if you audilology dept run special sn appts. Mine does they are longer than usual appts.
Secondly our staff were quite on the ball. Firstly ds just could not manage to wait in the waiting area so the room had to be free for when we arrived. They realised it was much better for ds and I to be alone in the room for some time to give him time to settle into the environment. Eventually one member of staff would come in and potter in the background until we felt that that ds could be approached. The tests were as low key ds friendly way as the staff could manage.
We also found it was important to have the same member of staff each time and not to allow any trainees to sit in. It was a disaster when they did.
Hope that helps
Thanks everyone! Your posts have helped tremendously. Think I lost perspective and had a mini melt down of my own last night! Have returned to sanity today...until the next appointment!
Don't worry ds1 and hearing tests were always um ahem interesting. As he can hear the microwave go on from 5 rooms away and can hear a packet of crisps from the other end of the house I don't think there's much wrong with his hearing. Just see the tests as something to jump though. It's a difficult time (I'm 10 years down the line - ds1 is 12 now), but it does get better....
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