ASD Safety and Boundary pushing by teens

[Mitmoo]

Just need to share:

My son 14 who is HFA and OCD diagnosed is on an emotional rollercoaster at the moment. One of the big things in the holiday is that he thinks I am overprotective (ex husband putting ideas into his head). He has wanted to be left fishing on his own, fishing chills him out, at lakes where there is no one else around. Not a chance, his Dad tells him I treat him like a baby and he repeats that to me getting upset. He's 14 and a really great kid.

I will only leave him at a fishery that has become like a second family, they know him, the bailliff is always there for him, it's small and he can easily get to the owners who are very friendly indeed. I know he is safe there, loads of people who know him around too who all help out when he gets stuck with knots and stuff that I just don't understand. It is like a small family feeling kind of fishery, perfect for him.

I just needed to share that he has gone to the local park with a friend, only about the second time he has done this all holiday and within the hour has fallen into a pond couldn't get out by himself and he was sinking in the silt, though water was shallow, and had to have his friend help him. He is in a full on panic, his friend calls so I get there, stop the Park Manager who drove me from the office to the pond across the park to get him to find he was ok but badly shaken up.

I don't think he will be asking again to go fishing on his own and I hope he realises that just occasionally Mum might actually not have been overprotective but putting the child's safety first.

I just had to get that off my chest if you're still awake I thank you.

[coff33pot]

I had obviously been asleep or I would have acknowledged your post

14 is a difficult age for anychild and they all like to test boundaries and want their independence.

It is a real shame he fell in the pond and good he had a friend with him to help. Yes he might now listen to you till the next independence burst rears its head But also it might teach him of the dangers around him and how to avoid it next time x

[bigbluebus]

Hope he has told his dad about the pond incident. I don't think it is advisable for anyone to undertake an activity near water when no-one else is around even if they are NT they could get into difficulty and if no-one around the consequences could be fatal.
You are not being over protective - just practical and sensible.
Let him have independence in places where there is limited chance of danger.