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urgent help needed TIA

(14 Posts)
devientenigma Fri 19-Aug-11 20:15:41

Hi all, I need help from all you wise people. We have been given tickets to see a football match, yes it's ds team and at his fave ground. However it's 28th Aug and we all know how ds doesn't deal with noise, crowds, anxiety etc.
So today dh and I decided to go and pay for the tour of the ground with him. He wouldn't leave the car!! After a huge meltdown we managed to talk him into crossing the road from the car park and touching the wall of the stadium. We are going to go everyday and try and take a step further. Any advice or other ideas would be great thanks x

BlueArmyGirl Fri 19-Aug-11 20:32:44

Would it be worth trying to get ome sound clips of stadium noise and using these. There are a range of websites that do free to download sound clips. Just an idea.

FauxFox Fri 19-Aug-11 20:35:48

Would it help to let him wear ear defenders? Can the stadium offer a queue jump so he can get in first/leave first if you think that would help?

purplepidjin Fri 19-Aug-11 20:38:24

Are any of these any good?

FauxFox Fri 19-Aug-11 20:39:10

Would a photo sequence of what will happen on the day covering travelling there from home to arriving back at home help? That really helped my son tackle a 10 pin bowling party when he had never been bowling before as he knew what to expect re: shoes etc and what it would all look like - he loved it!

bialystockandbloom Fri 19-Aug-11 20:47:10

Second the idea of photo sequence.

Also youtube videos of football matches - crowds, but also the match itself.

Is it the stadium itself that is the problem, do you think? I mean the size & noise?

In a way, if it's the noise and the crowds that he's worried about, having a tour of the ground beforehand might not be the main thing to focus on - an empty ground is very different from a full one! I'd probably try and get him more comfortable with the noise, smells, crowds etc. Anywhere you can take him in the run-up to get him more comfortable with this - local matches in the park, busy playgrounds, markets etc? And of course huge rewards for each step he takes.

devientenigma Sat 20-Aug-11 10:23:58

he does have ear defenders but since school (when he was there) got him the same ones he won't wear them. I have bought him another pair different colour but he still won't wear them. He will watch a match in the house but not a live match unless he's the only one in the room. I was going to ask what the stadium what they may be able to offer.
Apart from the journey there and back what else would he need in a photo sequence, I have never been to a football match so can only think he needs a picture of the game.
It will be the noise and crowds, we took him yesterday and he was a quivering wreck before getting out the car. Like the idea of local matches, never thought of that silly me. I just thought the tour would of give him a feel.
Thanks everyone.

FauxFox Sat 20-Aug-11 12:02:36

I have never been to a football match but I would be as detailed as poss:
1. Get in the car
2. Park in the carpak
3. Queue up
4. hand over tickets
5. find seats
6. sit and wait for the game to start/hear the warm up music or whetever happen
7. watch the match
8. Cheer/stand up/arms up etc when x team score
9. Boo/grumpy noises when other team score
10. Half time get food etc
and so on up until waiting to queue to get out etc

hope that helps. Google images and the club website will provide some appropriate photos I expect.

Can you get some ear defenders in his team colours specially for the event?

Good luck!

purplepidjin Sat 20-Aug-11 12:21:54

DP, who has actually been to footie and has a 5yo niece with ASD, says:

Go to an indoor shopping centre at busy times to replicate the noise, sounds and smells.

Sit DS on an aisle so he's got some space at least on one side

The ground should be able to sit you at the front in disabled seats - football stadia are very very good on disability access apparently. You should also be fast-tracked into the ground.

TooJung Sat 20-Aug-11 15:02:49

Has your ds asked to go to the match?

devientenigma Sat 20-Aug-11 18:47:55

He hasn't actually asked to go to the match but then he would never ask to go anywhere. After the 2 fiascos we had at a gradual step I'm now thinking of giving the tickets back. It really is asking too much of ds to give it a go, considering he won't go to most places. It was just with him being football crazy. Will still try and do a book with him just in case. I don't know where the seats are allocated as yet, the tickets are in the post, so don't know if I can sit him on an end.
Thanks again.

purplepidjin Sat 20-Aug-11 18:53:22

Phone the ground and let them know - DP reckons football is the most advanced area for recognising the needs of people with disabilities. The amount of footy matches he's been to, he should bloody know!

Annawiththebag Sun 21-Aug-11 13:08:54

Lots of good ideas above, contacting the Club may help. Also a visit to a football match at your local recreation ground on a Sunday morning might begin to give your DS a gentle introduction. A football match at his favourite team's home ground is likely to be an overwhelming sensory experience for him and maybe it's too much for your DS right now? Maybe a visit to the Team Shop would be something he would like (at a quiet time). Some children collect all the team paraphernalia but may not actually relate it to the actual experience of watching a football match.

bialystockandbloom Sun 21-Aug-11 20:08:37

Just wanted to add that I used to go to a lot of football games some years ago, premiership club. The crowd was c.40,000+ most matches. The noise is immense. Is it a big club?

Yes most/all league clubs should have a section for disabled people, but this would be mainly to accommodate people in wheelchairs/limited mobility so the space is at the front (near the touchline) with no seats needed. This means there wouldn't be the crowds to contend with during the game itself, and you could probably get fasttracked in (there might even be a separate entrance). But if the problem is with noise/crowds/sensory overload the disabled section alone sadly might not protect from that.

I would def try out a local match.

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