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I've just been seriously physically attacked by my ASD dd again.

(56 Posts)
thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 15:05:30

My dd has just completely lost it out on the street. She has scratched, kicked and spat at me for almost 20 minutes before I was able to get her home in one piece. She also did this last Thursday but today was much worse.
We have a CAMHS appointment in October with Psychologist and Psychiatrist but we cannot wait that long.
Has anyone taken their child to hospital under these circumstances to see a psych and get some more "instant" help.

EllenJaneisnotmyname Wed 17-Aug-11 15:26:35

So sorry, thornrose. No advice I'm afraid, but I'm sure you'll get some soon. (((hugs)))

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 15:27:34

Hi Ellen - god I hope so, I'm at my wits end.

AlfalfaMum Wed 17-Aug-11 15:40:04

Poor you, that's too much.
I haven't taken DD2 (Aspie) to hospital, but that said she hasn't attacked me that badly (as yet). She is more prone to loud crying and ranting, with the odd kick.
What caused it do you think? Sometimes if the road is noisy and busy it sets DD2 off; also supermarkets are a huge assualt on her senses, with all the lights/smells/noises. I usually avoid bringing her altogether, but that can be hard in the holidays.

Is your dd 'easier' during term time? Mine is, I'm counting the weeks!

50000feet Wed 17-Aug-11 15:46:16

I went private, I phoned up the priory in Birmingham and got an appt the next day but it cost 176 pound. Luckily Camhs phoned me with a cancellation. Phone Camhs and say you can't wait. They will either see you straight away or put you on cancellation list depending on your situation. Worth a try good luck. I have been there but she only went for me in the house so I could walk away - bath behind a locked door whilst she raved outside. X

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 15:47:27

The" triggers" can vary and it's often only after the fact I can see what went wrong. Today my mum, sister dd and myself were walking into town to have some lunch. She didn't want to walk, she wanted me tor drive. I said no, because we all wanted to walk across the beach.
She set off with an ill will but I really thought she'd come round. Then, and you are allowed to laugh here, a seagull pooed on me, I kid you not.
She turned this around to me being disgusting for having this happen confused and just went crazy. I told mum and sis to carry on and we'd catch up. Then she started kicking, scratching etc, she almost pushed me into the road. She was screaming to passers by that I was attacking her, the language was appalling. It was like a nightmare.
I really didn't see this coming.

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 15:50:53

I'm in West Sussex, I've only lived here for a year so not really aware of services.
5000feet, Have you tried any medication if you don't mind me asking? I've avoided it so far but she's 12 next month and it's becoming intolerable.
I'm willing to try anything now.

looneytoons Wed 17-Aug-11 16:05:04

My son is 13 a couple of years ago he got like this we phoned chams and asked for an emergency appointment and they fit us in quickly. As regards medication my son was becoming a danger to himself and every one around him so we put him on medication. It is trail and error to find the one that suits your child so if the first doesnt work or has unpleasant side effects there are others to try.

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 16:08:22

looneytoons, I tried to go to CAMHS with an emergency about 18 months ago (in Lambeth) and their response was "they are not an emergency service" and they were quite dismissive!
I think I'll try tomorrow because every time I think/talk about it I cry which is so annoying.
I really thought I might end up in front of a car today, and there is just no stopping her once she starts. It's escalating quite rapidly.

looneytoons Wed 17-Aug-11 16:15:03

Maybe you could take her to your own doctor and make him realise how bad things are he maybe able to refer her to someone who could help. It is looking like she needs medication as she is dangerous.

EllenJaneisnotmyname Wed 17-Aug-11 16:19:53

Your last paragraph is what you need to be saying.

I really thought I might end up in front of a car today, and there is just no stopping her once she starts.

It's escalating quite rapidly.

You need to emphasise that it is getting dangerous and you are frightened what might happen next. Does she self harm at all?

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 16:23:14

Yes, she is dangerous, and that is really hard to say "out loud". I was surprised someone didn't call the police today. It looked so bad.
I'm 5' 9" and quite strong, she's 5" nothing and has a tiny frame but she seems to have super human strength once in a rage. I'm not scared of her but I'm scared of what might happen and the fact I have NO control over it. I'm a grown-up, her parent, I should be able to stop this.

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 16:24:27

Obviously not 5" grin

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 16:25:17

She doesn't self harm thank god!

EllenJaneisnotmyname Wed 17-Aug-11 16:26:08

A little bit of exaggeration about your personal fear won't hurt. If she self harms, a hint about not knowing what she'll do next?

AlysWho Wed 17-Aug-11 16:40:48

My DD was like this age 12. its hormones aparently! I didnt go to A&E, but I did tell cry and shout at Social services, education managers, etc etc. I said wasnt coping and if someone didnt help me NOW I was going to call the police to take her away.Then I requested a residential school placement as her behaviour was unmanageable at home and she was refusing o go to school. That helped speed up respite services, DP, and eventually a special school placement. It has been a hard slog tho. We tried meds, priamrily for anxiety, setraline, but although it did help with the anxious/OCD type behaviours, she had some serious 'out of body' rages while on it so I weaned her off.
Its been a long 2 years, but I really feel we've turned a corner [touch wood].

Does she have her periods yet? does she have anyone to talk to? DD is so pleased to have a carer, she calls her 'my friend'. Is she bottling up emotions at school and coping long enough, and exploding at home? Theres been a lot of research recently into girls with ASD and how they differ so greatly from boys, as girls cope by mimicing social behaviours so effectively! 'social echolalia' - link here to NAS
really worth a read and watch the video clips too, esp head mistress one
sorry got to rush x

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 16:42:37

I think I'll call CAMHS tomorrow, explain the situation and see if I can get an emergency appointment. I'm "between" GP's at the moment as we've moved since the CAMHS referral and I haven't registered at a new GP yet.
If this fails, I'm going to enquire at hospital if they have a "walk-in" service for children's MH.
I'd quite like someone to see the scratches I'm covered in, just to kind of "prove" how real this is!

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 16:48:16

Thanks Alys, I appreciate you've got to rush, thanks for responding.
Yes she started her period at 10 and this is a major factor.
She does bottle up her issues at school and then explode at home.
She has a few friends for the first time ever and it takes a lot for her (and I) to maintain these friendships. Having friends is great but the effort she has to put in makes her "explode" after they have left too.
Her anxiety is terrible, she has health anxiety about all manner of illnesses which changes weekly.
I'll have a look at the link thanks.

50000feet Wed 17-Aug-11 16:48:52

No medication. My DD14 is High function ASD so there is nothing offered by Camhs (yet). Only advice on management of her and support for me. DD won't always attend. The violence has not happened for a while so they think this is working. DD is realising that I will call the police (2 times so far) I will call social services (who did visit) and I will make her pay for damage (wiped out all her savings). If I were you I would keep pushing and pushing as all our kids are different. I got to the stage when I would try anything and if I had not got an appointment I would have considered a and e - if that's how you feel then do it, nobody knows your DD like you, follow your instinct.

EllenJaneisnotmyname Wed 17-Aug-11 16:52:56

Take some photos of your scratches, just in case, and keep a diary of incidents so you can back up your concerns.

50000feet Wed 17-Aug-11 16:54:31

Don't enquire - they will fob you off if you don't show your desperate. Show your desperate. You said your not scared of your DD - don't wait till you are. I got scared in the end and that made things worse.

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 17:09:27

50000ft I know you're right!
Just off on a tangent, I'm moving next week into a private rented flat in a small block of flats. I'm really worried that dd's noise and bad language when she kicks off will cause problems.
Has anyone with violent, angry children had problems with neighbours?
I'm just worried about everything right now!

DCSsunhill Wed 17-Aug-11 17:14:22

Hi there. I was attacked by my eight yr old DS last night and have arms covered in scratches and bite marks. There was nothing I could do...even at eight, he is stronger than me. DS has a sensory disorder but CAMHS said no ASD. They are actually going to assess again as even they're not sure they have diagnosed properly.
As for the violence, I will watch this thread with interest. I called a few private psychologists today to enquire about anger management. I am terrified of this continuing as, when he is a teenager, i'm going to get hurt. I am very scared.

thornrose Wed 17-Aug-11 17:19:44

Hi DCS, isn't it just awful? My dd has Asperger's and dyspraxia, anxiety and OCD's.
I know a bit about anger management and I know it's just not enough for "our" children. It may work for NT children but this is a different ballgame.

AlysWho Wed 17-Aug-11 18:24:09

Hi thorn, just to say if your dd is hi functioning/AS, mainstream etc then she's probably q. diff to mine. However, the aggressive public outbursts are the same!
Everything varies so much from area to area, our CAHMS team for example are AWful, really no help at all. That really made me feel helpless wen they (wouldnt)couldnt help.
Meds are hard to get right, esp if your child cant describe their emotions to you, eg they cant describe any unpleasant side effects.
Personally I stopped taking DD out! Also got a lock on my kitchen door so she could thrash it out without hurting me. Also got good at a self protection.
For us lots of social stories, talking through the spectrum of emotions, how we feel and how we can respond to things in differnet ways. But also, other people getting involved, took the heat out and stopped it being such a 'head to head' situation. If CAHMS can do that for you then great. If not then teachers, LSA's, youth social workers, anygood?
Lastly, as I said she's MUCH better now at 14. She's in a better school, not residential but much better suited to her social needs, eg she's part of the school commnity again, instead of shut away in a small unit, at a mainstream comp but completely unable to access any of it. She's got her confidence back and feels 'important' again.
Good luck, xx

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