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Portage coming this morning and DD is in a foul mood.

(14 Posts)
alowVeraWithPurpleTwuntyPants Mon 08-Aug-11 09:03:27

she has been up since 5, is currently heading from unco-operative to destructive mode.
Portage are coming in an hour. Is it wrong of me to hope that she doesn't wear herself out before they get here.

I feel really bad for thinking I need them to see her like this.

The past 2 visits she has been really co-operative and angelic (which was rare for her). And I think I need them to see her at her worst for purely selfish reasons; I'm sure they think I'm making it all up.
my friend did until she looked after dd for a few hours
I just feel like the people who need to see her behaviour don't.

BlueArmyGirl Mon 08-Aug-11 09:52:38

That's often the way!

It's not wrong to want her to be on 'top form' when Portage arrive, what you want is for them to see what she's like for you when they're not there entertaining her for their visit. If she is angelic perhaps you could sabotage the situation to get an outburst from her, hasthe Portage home visitor tried that themselves, if not suggest it to her/him and offer some ideas as to how they could do it - if you know what the usual triggers are! :0

weakestlink Mon 08-Aug-11 11:35:27

No - they need to see how she really is!

A lot of my friends cant see why I'm worried about DS but that's because I avoid all situations where I know he will kick off and I watch him like a hawk just in case he pushes/hits another child wherever we go. My HV had also missed his odd behaviour!

alowVeraWithPurpleTwuntyPants Mon 08-Aug-11 12:08:17

Our HV missed that she was deaf, but picked up on her other "oddities". Trouble is not everything is focused on/ put down to her being deaf, but there is something else.
Hmm I did consider sabotage last week.

Ps, they're not hear yet! I know it's definitely today. Maybe confused the times.

BlueArmyGirl Mon 08-Aug-11 14:08:38

How did it go? Angelic or nightmare as hoped? grin

alowVeraWithPurpleTwuntyPants Mon 08-Aug-11 16:23:56

have calmed down now. How'd it go? Hmmm.
We've been up since 5.15am, 10.30 came and went. Thought maybe I had the time wrong, waited until 12.30 and phoned them.
Apparently she'd knocked on the door but thought nobody was on so went. Aaaaahhhhh. I've been in the front room all morning except to nip to the toilet. trust her to have turned up when I'm in the loo. Although not sure. But either way I would have/should have heard her.
So mad. Mainly at myself and a little bit at her for for not having the sense to knock loudly now they can't come out again until next week.

Dd was a nightmare all morning, screaming at nothing, tantruming because I wouldn't let her have a mini milk for breakfast, bit me because I told her to let go of the puppy's tail. Trashed the room about 4 times because i tried to tidy up. Emptied the toy box twice because something was put on it's lid and it freaks her out, Kept trying to move the sofa, climbed on the table umpteen times. Decided she didn't like the dog crate where it was. Spent half an hour colour matching her puzzle. And having a strop if anybody touched anything.

Rinse and Repeat.

I am so gonna sabotage it next week if dd is being "good"

EllenJaneisnotmyname Mon 08-Aug-11 18:27:42

How annoying, Alow. You almost wonder if she just fancied an hour off today, but that's being a bit mean, I suppose. Good luck next week, if you do stick pins in make sure the portage lady doesn't notice! grin

BlueArmyGirl Mon 08-Aug-11 19:39:06

Oh what a shame, would have been a good session...probably!! Hope next week is a bad morning too - but for all the right reasons grin of course!

Our Portage home visitors put a note through the door to say they've been but you weren't it - perhaps you could suggest this to them - that way if you missed the knock but were in you could ring them and if they were close enough they could come back.

Has dd got a diagnosis of anything yet?

alowVeraWithPurpleTwuntyPants Mon 08-Aug-11 20:08:30

Other than being deaf, and her speech and language delay, they won't "name" anything else yet. They seem to be putting everything down to that.

But before her hearing diagnosis they were talking about ASD.
Frustratingly that seems to have been forgotten.

Although the portage worker last week noticed something in her behaviours.

I know a few other parents of deaf DCs, but none of their DCs behaviours even come close to DD.

If you give her medicine it has to be 3 spoons, no more no less.
If you put anything on her toy box she goes mad.
She will only sleep with a pillow/blanket over her face & head.
She will only sit at one end of the bath.
She lines things up (dishwasher tablets, building blocks,)
She hates crowds /large groups of people
She doesn't like to make eye contact
She is fascinated by lights
She'll lie on the sofa/rug/door mat and run her finger up and down it
Stickers freak her out
She has a peppa pig house and she will make peppa go in the door and up the stair over and over for an hour at a time.
If she plays a sorting game (shapes/colours) and you even dare put one in the wrong place she freaks out big time.
If you move something she goes a bit loopy too.

Is this normal for a 3yo? Because dd1 didn't do any of these things.

weakestlink Mon 08-Aug-11 20:35:47

alow I get a lot put down to DS's history of glue ear. I'm sure some of it is that esp S&L delay but like you - I am sure there is more to it than just hearing.

alowVeraWithPurpleTwuntyPants Tue 09-Aug-11 06:55:49

Weakest - it is so frustrating isn't it?

BlueArmyGirl Tue 09-Aug-11 20:21:58

What type and level of deafness does she have?

I think you're right the behaviours you list do not seem 'typical' and deafness may not account for them all or fully. Just because she has a hearing impairment does not meant that she may not have something else going on as well - as you suspect - however, don't under estimate the significant impact a hearing loss can have (that's why I ask about the severity).

alowVeraWithPurpleTwuntyPants Wed 10-Aug-11 14:46:19

She is profound on one side. (aid does nothing). And the other side ranges from profound to mild and back down to severe. But aid works on that side.

hatchypom Fri 12-Aug-11 18:24:22

My dd is also deaf ( Ansd) and displayed some of those traits before she gained speech ( no words pre 2 years old) a tendency towards controlling their environment and looking for order is common as it helps to provide a crutch in the quiet unexplainable world, particularly with fluctuating hearing. Has your dd got enough language to explain her feelings ?

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