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Not sure how to feel.....dual diagnosis

(7 Posts)
Anna85 Tue 05-Jul-11 20:03:39

Today I was told as expected my DS who already has HFA has ADHD as well.

He is 5 1/2 and I felt a bit fobbed off really.

They gave me a list of parenting courses to attend and said they would review things in January. I did try telling them I have had many courses and support from professionals re his autism. The course in particular was Triple P.

The Dr said that as he is in reception he wanted to see how he performs in Year 1 before decided if medication is needed.

I suppose I feel just a bit annoyed that a lot of these professionals think the answer is parenting! I agree that we need to be educated but feel its not an answer......I may be wrong!!!

holidaytime Tue 05-Jul-11 20:15:30

A lot of doctors won't medicate children until they are six years old because the medicine has not been tried on children as young as this and they dont know if it is safe. I think they offer all parents courses to go on so that it looks like they are being supportive.

Maryz Tue 05-Jul-11 20:31:47

I would go along to the parenting course anyway. I have been to a couple over the years, and I really do feel they help when parenting a particularly challenging child.

I also don't feel that you have to be a bad parent to get help from a parenting course - being a good parent, and being aware of your child's particular needs means you can get a lot more out of a course than someone who attends reluctantly, iyswim.

When ds1 was 9 (diagnosis at the time Asperger's, but probably multiple issues), I went on a course with parents whose children had various needs - from just very active, to quite severely affected by ADHD and ODD, and I learned a lot. First, I learned that I was actually doing things quite well, second, I learned to be much more effective (we went home to practice techniques, came back and discussed, and it was great) and thirdly I learned that I was entitled to some "me" time, that it wasn't all my fault and my responsibility, and I learned to look at things outside the box. It really improved my relationship with him (and with my other two) at the time.

The trouble with multiple diagnoses, is that there is a spectrum that all children are on, and many children who are towards the autistic end of the spectrum have ADHD traits, and many children with a dignosis of ADHD have autistic traits (things like dyslexia and OCD and others are also on the spectrum, and many of the symptoms inter-relate).

They won't want to medicate unless and until they think he needs it. I would go along with what they say for the moment, keep a diary, and push for further intervention (if you think you need it) next time you see them.

Anna85 Tue 05-Jul-11 20:49:37

I am just having bad day I think x

uninspired Tue 05-Jul-11 21:00:37

Anna take your time to come to terms with it.

Even though you have been heading down this road, when it actually happens it can be quite a blow.

Please don't dismiss the parenting course out of hand, after DS got his diagnosis we were referred for one - it was for parents of newly diagnosed DCs and it was really useful to speak to other parents who were going through the same things.

It also helped us understand that parenting an ASD child is often the opposite of conventional parenting. For eg - the clear and direct speaking - "DS shoes on" sounds rude and abrupt when other parents are saying "Darling please can you put that down and come over here, we need to get your shoes and put them on" but DCs with ASD need clear and unambiguous sentences etc

Maryz Tue 05-Jul-11 21:02:25

Don't we all smile.

Anna85 Tue 05-Jul-11 22:04:58

I have been to ones for his ASD and loved them x

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