potty training - how old was your ASD?

[LunarRose]

Hi just wondering if I how old your ASD child was when they were potty trained? (wees and poos)

have a debate with an annoying family member who feels that a 3 nearly 4year old with ASD SHOULD be trained by now, would like to know what the average is

[blueShark]

At 3 for both, then regressed with number 2 but completely clean before turning 4 with no accidents ever since.

[EllenJaneisnotmyname]

Ok.
Wees, nearly 3. (Brilliant at it.)
Poos, still not there. He's 11.

[cwtch4967]

DS is almost 4 - no signs of being ready at all! One of the aims on his Statement is that DS will be able to communicate his toilet needs to an adult! I live in hope............

[catherinea1971]

Ok just been today with ds 4 (ASD) to see the continence nurse, she says they are all different, some will be trained by 4yrs however most struggle. She has advised me that it is likely in her experience to take a while for my ds, years in fact. I am also fed up with people pulling faces and telling ds that he should be wearing big boy pants by now, from now on they will be getting an earful from me because psychologically comments like that will make matters worse.

[Marne]

4.5 for dd2 (asd), dd1 (as) was dry at 2.5 but we trained her before we had a dx and it was hell, she was dry but refussed to use the toilet (only potty) until she started school.

[Marne]

Oh and dd2 trained 2 weeks after our first delivery of nappies, we are still using them now (a year later) for night times .

[Pixel]

Ds was 6 and a half. We had a few attempts before that but he was in no way ready, then he seemed to 'get it' quite quickly. He still has occasional poo accidents but that is due more to his bowel problems than anything else and he is always fine at night.

cwtch4967 Ds is 11 now and still can't communicate his toileting needs but he seems to manage just fine and accidents are rare, usually when he isn't well. Indoors he can take himself when he needs to go and although he still can't wipe himself and manage to do up his trousers we have a small house so I usually hear him and go and help him. When we are out I just make sure I take him to the toilet often so he has plenty of opportunities if he needs to go. We have just been on a camping holiday and he coped fine that way.

[cansu]

4 for dd2 but only wees (after an intensive toilet training regime as part of ABA programme. She still poos in knickers age 6. Ds1 only just trained aged 9, after specialist school spent almost a year with him in pants cleaning him up umpteen times per day.

[LunarRose]

Thank you all - the input is really very helpful!!

[LunarRose]

(keep it coming)

[coff33pot]

DS was dry within a few days of starting school 4yrs (day only) that said he couldnt stand the feel of nappies or anything and would rip it off and wee anywhere! and even now will still run round without pants on but he will use the toilet but will only STAND on it as he has a fear of falling in and he is just about 6. Poo took longer and he would become constipated as he would hang on all day till night time and do it in his nappy then when he was asleep. He is still not dry at night.

[Twowillbefine]

Hello - just wanted to say good luck whenever it happens. DS1 (ASD) now dry during the day (since Easter) with no trouble and only a couple of accidents. He is 4.6. We tried at Xmas and had some small success in asking for a nappy but then failed to consolidate at nursery. At easter made great strides which I think is also because his language has come on so well.

However we still put a "poo nappy" on in the evening and a "night time nappy". Stands to wee and will not sit on the toilet! Hope to tackle next steps over summer.

[sphil]

DS2, who has severe ASD, was reliable by 6 for wees but not out of night time nappies until 7.5. After a few weeks of being dry at night he went back to wetting the bed, which he still does about 5 nights out of 7. He now refuses to wear a nappy at night, so we just rely on waterproof sheets and do an awful lot of washing!

He is now 8.5 and is pooing in the loo independently, and has just learnt to wipe himself. It was a hard 2.5 years getting to this stage - lots of accidents in pants (never at school though, interestingly), smearing and mess. Very occasionally we still have to clear up a bit of poo, usually when he's unwell or hasn't managed to wipe himself with the appropriate item (!), but it is soooo much better than it was, and to be honest, I've almost forgotten what it was like before. If you look up my old threads on toileting you will see that it was a huge issue though!

He has some speech (mainly single words) and is able to ask for the toilet. He says 'poo' if he needs help with wiping and has just started to say 'wee-wee'. Won't stand up to wee though, which is a pain if we're out and he needs to wee in the bushes...

[FickleFreckle]

Ds 4.8 is just starting to do regular poos in the loo in the morning as of last ten days (yayy!!!) with still a few episodes of soiling. With wees you just have to cross your fingers (he won't be crossing his legs, that's for sure, UNLESS he's on the loo ) and hope you get him at the right moment as he has no idea whatsoever and will stay dry for ages then flood despite having been on the loo in between, or wet in little bits throughout the afternoon. He can't wee standing up, full stop. He doesn't have much awareness of being soiled or wet unless it soaks through his clothes when he is upset We are concentrating on habit training at the moment, because we know he doesn't really have much if any conscious control.

[Agnesdipesto]

4.5
Glad we waited as sorted wees, poos and nights, outings etc all in the space of a week
Many many children in special schools are only dry by schedule not actually fully independent, so its good to wait until they are ready
We tried a few months earlier but met major resistance.
We then did it intensively in a few days - literally we sat and read books on the loo and gave him favourite drinks until he went - then he got to get off and major treat - then after 15-20 mins he went back on the loo, more drinks etc until he went again. Aim is to get lots of practice
We then gradually let him move further and further away from toilet and for longer times - but was gradual
Was 3 days playing in the hallway!
We also had help from his ABA therapy team.
Now he just accepts it as a rule and for once being rigid is helping as he will even get out of the swimming pool 3 times to go.

[magso]

It depends what you call trained! I would go with your gut feeling on this one. I started potty training Ds at 3 (with some earlier preparation work)because of pressures around me but to be honest ds even at 11 is not independent on the continance front. Its the people around him who are 'trained'!! Agree with agnes!

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

DD is 4.7 and nowhere near being trained

[lostsomewere]

3.5 did day and night at the same time. Took to it straight away but now at 7 he wets the bed about five times a month sometimes more sometimes less.

[krissz]

Thank you for replying,

We have somone through NHS just once in a month.

Also we tried many center but i couldn't find similar age for Leo and for myself to talk to.

[keepingupwiththejoneses]

DS3 is 4.11 and still in nappies. I was recently told by paed that the average is about 7-8years for a child with moderate ASD.

[cxxxcxxx]

My daughter was dry at 8 but still insisted on pull-ups for poos until she was 91/2. There are books on toilet training children with ASD - just get in touch with the National Autistic Society and they will send you a list.

[nicevideoshameaboutthesong]

DD1 dry wee at 3, poos at 4, but wetted at night up to 6.

DD2 still wet and poo at nearly 3, either doesnt care/notice, or screams she wasts them off her the second she pees. But she pees 12+ times a day, dribbles mostly... i dont know what to do to help her.

[Latteaddict]

DS2 was dry at the end of his Reception year (SN school, and other similar children in his class and group "toiletting" lessons! helped massively) so age 5. However he still tends to wee as he needs to, so will rush to a piece of grass if we're in town rather than asking for a toilet. He did start refusing overnight nappies when he was around 6 yrs old - and he was actually right on this one, as he hasn't wet much overnight since (very occasionally happens, or he pulls his bedding off the bed and wees on it to absorb/hide the evidence).

Poo he withholds during the day, then tends to poo his pants, and also prefers to poo in the shower ( but will then move the poo into the toilet). He still goes through a couple of sets of pyjamas each night. At 5/6 yrs he would poo in his pants constantly (had started refusing nappies once he was dry) so we were using 5 or 6 sets of underwear and trousers each day.

He's 9 now (and although most of his classmates with dx of ASD are now dry, there's still a couple who aren't).

[BabeRuthless]

DS trained at home at age 3.5. One year on & he's wet most nights but refuses to wear any kind of nappy/ training pants at night (dp also thinks it will "set him back" so not a lot of support there) He'll use a toilet fine at home & at his grandparents but refuses to use any kind of public toilet including the ones at school. I think he's scared of falling off/in & when we go out he'll only sit on a potty which considering his size is now mean feat.

He knows when to go & is fine at home, it's just out in the big world that we struggle.