Please can anyone help me as you can see I cant sleep and am feeling quite desperate. For the first time in my life I just have no idea what to do next and whom to trust.
I have had a meeting with my childs psychiatrist today, she is part of the CAMHS multi disciplinary team that were helping us. My husband and I have attended 6 months of meetings with CAMHS to try to establish a reason for my DS?s problems. I was asked to come alone today and discovered that this psychiatrist insists that I see a psychiatrist myself. She stated that I am the only person who sees anything different with my 6 year old DS, apparently everyone else states he is normal even school, despite their reporting issues to me and my DS having endured an undiagnosed medical condition for at least 2 years. My husband has attended every meeting and we are in total agreement and others actually suggested the differences years before we would ever consider it. I accept that I have been too forceful in seeking help for my DS but I just want all their happiness and health and will do anything in my power to provide it. I admit that I have found the NHS slow and frustrating and at times incompetent and very different to my professional life pre children and in hindsight I may not have hidden these feelings.
The multi disciplinary team state that they find my child charming and delightful (which is true with adults, I find it the same, his interest in everything is infectious). I think the psychiatrist is suggesting munchausens, this was discussed and certainly not denied in the meeting today. I have read up about this tonight and it is absolutely frightening as it is clearly stated as child abuse. The psychiatrist stated that every professional involved with us (not just those in the CAMHS team) reports that I have failed to bond with any of my children and do not connect with them, this appears to include my health visitor. I thought I had the most wonderful experience of motherhood, absolutely loving it and having 2 other children with no issues.
I actually thought I was a natural mother, it seemed to come so easily and I was so relaxed that I initially welcomed home visits from CAMHS thinking they would be helpful and supportive and non judgemental. I never dreamt the outcome would include possible neglect and a suggestion that I do not feed my eldest. I was told that I had no idea how to comfort my youngest when seen to cry on the CAMHS home visit whom I thought/still think is the happiest toddler ever with an absolute love of life and constant interaction. I was told that I had/still have PND. Having supported several friends through PND I cant believe anyone would ever think I had/have it as my hormones certainly had the reverse effect. I had always appreciated how lucky I was and just thought this was genetic as my mother was the same and in part due to successful sole breastfeeding and use of sling etc.
CAMHS plan to have a professionals meeting to discuss all this and will then feedback to us. Unfortunately I have made several complaints about misdiagnosis and mistakes in particular where a major medical condition took 2 years to be diagnosed in my child and if NICE protocol had been followed it should have been found on the very first appointment. This could potentially have saved my child 2 years of very serious distress. Aside from the school all the medical personnel invited to the meeting are the ones I have made complaints about! The paediatrician whom we have seen regularly for 4 years and I think I may still trust is not invited, nor is my GP. Aside from anything else I obviously dont want the school to be told these things about me as my younger two have still to start there and my eldest has years more there. I had asked CAMHS to speak to some people outside the medical professions ie playgroups, clubs, friends, family just anyone who sees me regularly with my children but they have refused. Does anyone know if it is standard procedure that parents cannot attend the professionals meeting and if so can we send a representative and whom would you recommend?
My husband is also in absolute shock at this news and just cannot believe they can think I am the problem and that he had trusted them. Luckily he is still totally supportive to me and I have always believed and still believe that he thinks I am doing a great job and marvels at my patience. I am not a saint and I was sure there were parenting techniques we could improve and I thought that I welcomed any recommendations CAMHS had to offer, until now! I expected the advice to focus on my eldest as the second responds brilliantly to all praise and has great behaviour as is naturally compliant and the youngest is just a very happy one year old.
Unfortunately my mother knew Sally Clark and was severely affected by her case and other situations and she has absolutely no trust in the system here and is telling me to emigrate which is certainly not helping me to sleep! Surely a whole team cannot get it so wrong? How can I survive the next month until the meeting?
Has any one experienced any accusations, maybe munchausens or an instruction for psychiatric help or lack of bonding when they have just been seeking help for their child? Does anyone have any advice or know how the CAMHS system works in this respect? How can you ever cope with this? My hands are still shaking after 12 hours. Please help me.***
Many thanks.
Apologies for the length of post and any errors as I am very emotional. Should I post this somewhere else as we have no special needs diagnosis but where as I need support?
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.
SN children
CAMHS insist I must see a psychiatrist - please help
plshelpnamechange · 16/04/2011 03:50
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