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The profs are not going to be happy with me on Tue, starting to worry now!!

(16 Posts)
realisticdevientenigma Sat 01-Jan-11 21:12:12

As some of you know my son is a prolific school refuser (special school). He's says he's scared, doesn't like the noise and doesn't like having friends, among other issues.
Anyway to cut a long story short, for the umpteenth time the behaviour team were coming on Tue for the first day back to force him into going. Last year he hardly done Sep to Dec.
I have sent emails etc about my concerns to no avail. However I spoke to the behaviour team yesterday, read them the emails and they agreed to cancelling.
The SW for one will be furious.

moondog Sat 01-Jan-11 21:37:10

Whar does he( and you) do when he doesn't attend school?

lisad123isasnuttyasaboxoffrogs Sat 01-Jan-11 21:58:07

so what day will he do it now?

StartingAfresh Sat 01-Jan-11 22:04:10

What goes on when he isn't at school?

I gotta meeting (in theory - may also be cancelled) with the autism service. They have said the agenda is to inform me their role of supporting ds' school. I told them I wanted a meeting about their role in meeting ds' needs. I haven't heard from them since so ?????

What happens next after the cancelled meeting? Why will the SW be furious?

PipinJo Sat 01-Jan-11 22:19:56

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PipinJo Sat 01-Jan-11 22:53:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

realisticdevientenigma Sun 02-Jan-11 01:17:54

When he's not in school, he's basically watching TV while I potter doing housework. We play football, read books etc Personally I don't feel there is a lot of engagement between us, and if it wasn't for me he wouldn't ask.
No future date agreed, though we may be trying to get a meeting together at some point. They don't intend forcing him in to school unless it's prooven that what they do will have no psychological issues.
The sw will be furious as she feels he should be in school, thus giving me a break.
There is no home ed in the meantime. Yes my son would be great with a 1:1, something he used to have.
I have had a half hearted look at ABA, though don't know much. I also haven't looked at the springer article, so will pm you, if thats ok.
Must also add my son does not have an official dx of asd, however profs not linked to the school system feel he his, the latest being his cardiologist stating it in his report. It's school who think he isn't, however it's easier for them to let him be in control as it doesn't disrupt the rest of the class, iyswim.
My son is primarily down syndrome, sld, spd etc. His class size over the past few month has also went from 7 kids with 5 staff, to 10 kids and 6 staff, something I would anticapate being another problem he will have with school.
Hope that has answered all questions asked. Thanks for answering and look forward to any further comments.

realisticdevientenigma Sun 02-Jan-11 01:18:29

Sorry Pipin, didn't understand the casual relationship??

BuckingxmasFells Sun 02-Jan-11 01:59:36

causal rather than casual i think.

realisticdevientenigma Sun 02-Jan-11 10:17:42

sorry still dont understand, however I will attempt to google lol.
Must also add for the 1st time in nearly 10year of my sons life,a number of family members have had something positive to say about him. Over a few different occasions!!

pinkorkid Sun 02-Jan-11 10:21:24

Devient, Just wondered if you had enquired if ds would be eligible for home tuition service?
It's aimed at (among others) pregnant schoolgirls, long term sick children and school phobics. In our area called alchoos (alternatives for children out of school or some such). The educational welfare officer and/or school senco should have contact details. Our ds is also a long term school refuser but was able to access this service after being out of school for 3 months. In fact the law says any child long term sick for longer than a few weeks is entitled to alternative provision but in reality takes longer to organise. Key to access for us was a letter from camhs consultant saying ds couldn't cope with school due to extreme anxiety. Ds' tutor has been great with him though not a long term solution.

But before I get your hopes up too much, legal minimum provision is 5 hours per week and, if your lea is like ours, that's also their maximum. Still, it would give you a small break and help your ds to keep up with some formal learning. They also potentially offer a mentoring service where someone will come and talk to your ds, take him out for fun activity - always providing he's willing to go - and when you get to that stage support him with reintegration at school, go into lessons with him. Also if your ds will cooperate, tutor can potentially do 1-1 lessons in a separate room at school with ds building up to reintegration.


lisad123isasnuttyasaboxoffrogs Sun 02-Jan-11 10:25:14

having met you all I understand why you would have such a difficult time getting him to school, he appears strong physically and also strong willed grin
Can you request 1-1 tutor at home until this is sorted?

realisticdevientenigma Sun 02-Jan-11 10:31:28

Thanks Pink, will ask about it.
Also think I have the causal relationship theory, though no answers. Obviously the cause of him refusing more often than not means he doesn't go. However there's been timed where hes been tricked into going, felt under pressure to go as he sw or school collect him. Though he has refused for thesw before and school never doneit enough for him to create.
So I would say once he has refused, (being the cause?), the effect is unpredictable.

realisticdevientenigma Sun 02-Jan-11 10:46:39

grin lol Lisa x

beachholiday Sun 02-Jan-11 15:11:26

Just saw that your son may have a dual diagnosis of Downs and ASD.

This site is very useful and readable.

realisticdevientenigma Mon 03-Jan-11 22:06:45

Thanks, Beach, I have had a load of info of them before, have also tried using some of it to help his case to no avail.
Anyway tomorrow is fast approaching!!!!!!!!!!

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