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Interesting article -Sorry, it's the Daily Fail!

(16 Posts)
siblingrivalry Wed 08-Dec-10 08:04:34


I found it really interesting and moving -although also apprehensive about the future.

HecTheHallsWithBoughsOfHolly Wed 08-Dec-10 08:09:29

I’m spared the problems of one American mother I read about whose fully-grown autistic son insists on dressing as a green fairy, complete with taffeta wings.

That made me laugh my head off! - that's going to be ds2, I just know it is! grin

but on a serious note - it does make you think. I know as my 2 are approaching the teenage years I am thinking of their adult life, levels of independence they are likely to have - whether they'll ever find love...

siblingrivalry Wed 08-Dec-10 08:14:58

Hecate, I laughed at that too! Only because I can identify with it - dd went through a phase of wearing a Mr Incredible outfit everywhere here

It's a really thought provoking article isn't it?

sarah293 Wed 08-Dec-10 08:52:18

Message withdrawn

HecTheHallsWithBoughsOfHolly Wed 08-Dec-10 09:16:46

yes, my youngest went through what we call his "purple princess party dress" phase. Frilly purple party / bridesmaid dress. And make up. And nail polish.

He still likes to wear makeup now, but he's not so bothered about the dresses.

What's she meant to do, riven? she's meant to shut up, go away, struggle with it all on her own and not be a bother to the authorities. That's what she's meant to do.


wraith Wed 08-Dec-10 09:29:46

even though its from the fail its a good article and aptly demonstrates the deapth or lack of it these teenage autistics have even highly functioning ones can suffer from the situations.

bullet234 Wed 08-Dec-10 10:04:29

Very informative.

auntevil Wed 08-Dec-10 14:10:07

My DH has put aside money each month as a 'leaving home please' fund. My DS1 has told us that he is never leaving home. He might get a job, but he will always live with us. I think it might be true - even my DH is coming round to that idea. Doesn't stop him saving though - just in case!

LivinInThe80s Wed 08-Dec-10 14:46:17

I thought this article was really well written, its so hard to find anything on older children. auntevil - ds2 has said he wants to live in our house forever. when he is a man, we will be the ones who have to move out apparently grin

borderslass Wed 08-Dec-10 16:56:40

DS is 16 and has never socialised with friends he doesn't have any all the kids here hate him We don't know what will happen when we cant manage anymore but to be honest DS has come on so much in the last year that he doesn't need much looking after he has his moments when he can get really violent, can't wash his hair himself, and has to be told to get a shower, has to lifted out of bed because he'll not get up.
But once he's awake as long as he's got his meals he's fine just needs someone in the house to supervise him so he doesn't do anything silly.
DD1 has said she'll always be there for him but I can't expect that of her.
He has said if he leaves home hes taking his wall with him because DD1 painted a Star Wars mural on it 5 years ago.

StarlightMcKenzie Wed 08-Dec-10 19:45:08

Message withdrawn

auntevil Thu 09-Dec-10 08:34:52

I know what you mean starlight - it did look rather nice. I don't think i would want to move anywhere if i had a house like that!

willowthecat Thu 09-Dec-10 12:01:30

Think she has written a book about her house and its history / it does look fab

LaydeeC Thu 09-Dec-10 14:51:46

my 11 yo dtr has cried before when asking who was going to look after her brother when I am dead.
My response was honest, 'I don't know' and she told me that she would always look after him.
I wish the bastards who fail to make provision or provide services to give our children half a chance at getting by were a fraction as compassionate.
Sorry, in an angry mood as listening to the debate on uni fees...

auntevil Thu 09-Dec-10 15:35:37

I think i'm kind of hoping that i can instil enough genuine love for each other that they will all support each other as they are older.
Life is very fickle. My NT brother couldn't --poke his nose in-- care for mum often enough when he was single and living in this country. Now she has dementia i'd be surprised if he makes contact more than once a year - mainly to talk money, or how bad he feels about not being able to do more. This country as a society doesn't know the half of how little care is given. I don't think it's always that they don't care, just they don't know the emotional impact of no support, not knowing what support will be on going, who will help when you can't, etc. It's quite often those that have been through similar situations, or whose parents did, that understand and offer help.

madsadlibrarian Mon 13-Dec-10 10:48:35

everyone is up in arms about people who are capable of earning £25,000 per year having to pay £7 per week for their degree - yet those who can't fend for themselves at all are left to flounder.

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