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im worried about my DS

(5 Posts)
pinkstarlight Thu 18-Nov-10 21:20:50

my ds has learning difficulties,dyspraxia and speech and language disorder despite all this hes always been popular and has or should i say had a large group of friends.
i fought the LA to keep him in mainstream school because he wanted to stay with his friends but since starting secondary school in september hes become so moody and keeps falling out with his friends.
hes also seeming to stop wanting to go out so when kids call for him he says no so as a result his friends call for him less and less.hes just so different to what he was a few months ago where he had constant plans every day.
he has a fulltime TA and according to his school they say hes doing briliantly far better than they ever expected,but i do think hes far more tired after school then he use to be.
today hes come home really upset he had another falling out with friends but this time it ended up with pushing and shoving and he banged his head, the school are very protective over my son and the other boy got in trouble but i suspect my son pushed his friend first.
ive tried talking to my son but he just does not do serious conversations,when i ask him why he no longer wants to go out with friends he just says he cant be bothered.

SausageMonster Thu 18-Nov-10 21:28:40

He's probably starting to notice the difference for himself. Adolesence is a time when pronblems that have been managed in earlier years come to a head.

How much education are you giving him about hisactual condition, how it affcets him and teaching him strategies to help him? This is the sort of social education he needs. He should be getting that from the support workers at school too.

Does he have an IEP that has social skills targets?

Unfortunately its us parents that have to find them hobbies and interests to make up for the fact that their peers are leaving them behind. It's important to encourage them to do interests out of the house to maintain social contact - otherwise you'll have a bedroom hermit hooked to his computer 24/7 (like mine).

Best wishes

pinkstarlight Thu 18-Nov-10 21:39:08

this is the thing hes always been very sociable this is a sudden but gradual change since starting secondary school.hes very aware of his problems and strangley is a confident child,hes naturally very funny so people always like him. im just worried about these moods.

SausageMonster Thu 18-Nov-10 21:47:17

Secondary is very different from junior. They have different teachers for each lesson, different classrooms to find his way to, plus a whole bunch of 'new' classmates he didn't know from junior.

couple that with the on-set of puberty and it all becomes too much and they handle it by withdrawing.

If you're worried about his mood then definitely take him to GP and use that as an additional reason as to why he needs to be seen by CDC earlier than later.

I'm sorry to have to say it but you need to be driving this - not waiting for SENCO etc to get their act together. You need to be pushing your child to the front of the CDC queue. It's terribel, I know, but unfortunately that's how you get help.

Best wishes

pinkstarlight Thu 18-Nov-10 22:47:15

my son has support from all the services OT,speech,pead,EP,statemented for 32 1/2 hrs per wk.visual timetables,use of laptop in lessons everything is set up for him to be able to cope. the school and teachers have been very caring and supportive i cant praise them enough.hes not been bullied in any way and has also made a few new friends but they all live a distance away. the problem is his group of friends hes had since he was 4 and his moods at home.

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