Lets get the obvious out of the way first. Yes DS is two and a half, yes he has a new baby sister, yes I am tired, yes I play with him, yes I know all two year olds are difficult. No I dont have post natal depression. Sorry for being defensive, I know you are all lovely on here, its just the rest of the world who seem insistant on making me feel like this is normal/I am a bad mum and I know its not and im not.
DS has been a TERRIBLE sleeper since birth. He now wakes up at 10pm and we can settle him. But from 3 or 4am onwards he is awake for the day. That is the best we can manage and that is with DH sleeping in bed with him every night. No amount of consistent discipline or sleep methods have ever had any effect what so ever. He does not sleep during the day and really hasnt done since birth.
He has always taken everything to a completely different level than friends children of the same age. Physically he is slightly crazy, jumps off tables, climbs the walls. swings upside down on door handles. He is never still. Not even in his sleep.
He has terrible tantrums, mostly from frustration, or because he cannot sit still when I need him to. We have reached a stage where we cannot go out to the shops or any sort of restaurant as it is totally pointless. He just wants to run off and do what he wants to do - totally understandable for a 2.6 year olds but we just cant do anything. Things we expect to be fun and nice like going to the park or for a walk always seem to end up being a nightmare.
He is sociable so I cant imagine he has any straight forward autism. DH has just done one of those online autism tests on himself and comes up with a very high score so its made me realise that there might be some genetic thing going on.
He plays with the following - pretend hoovers, pretend chainsaws, pretend tea set, trains, anything with wheels. All of the above involve making a kind of hoover noise incessantly throughout the day. He repeats things over and over, little phrases he picks up off the tv, things he hears us saying. repeats repeats repeats.
He is jealous of the new baby but there has always always been something more going on.
He is apparently an angel at the childminders and for my mother in law which just serves to make me feel like a bad mother. HV sent us on the parenting course which also made me feel like she thought I was a bad mother. I am not. I read parenting books obsessively and consistently apply all the things you are supposed to do. Being strict escalates things and I now know that unless I want to ruin the whole day it is better ignore as much as possible rather than cause the rolling on the floor uncontrollable screaming which lasts forever. Friends then tell me I am too soft on him.
Over the last week I have spent most of my day screaming in his face, trying not to scream in his face, trying not to smack him.
We have had a mental health person for his sleep for the past two years but she has just signed us off as normal. I dont feel FUCKING normal. I have been crying since 4am!
What on earth could be wrong. My mental health expert lady went NUTS when I suggested he might have ADHD and said she had seen lots of boys with ADHD and he defo did not have it and that he was capable of playing nicely with toys blah blah blah
WITS END - please help!
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.
SN children
Please tell me what is wrong with my son (or me.....)
smugtandemfeeder · 05/11/2010 06:33
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