Struggling with 4 year olds aggression

[ClimbingPenguin]

I have a mostly lovely and clever 4 DS, but he seems to translate anxiety, frustration and anger as agression. Despite attempts to deflect his aggression, the only thing he wants to do is hurt people. Ever since he was two.

He starts school in September and his key worker at nursery has been ill so every day we've had reports of him biting children or threatening the staff.

He is quite bright, already reading level 3a books, likes simple math (been able to do sums up to/subtracting to 10 for a year), can do 150 piece puzzles.

What he doesn't like is change, changing his bedding makes him upset. He doesn't play with children that much, although does now do a bit, as well as some role play games (pretend kitchen). It feels like he is a year/18 months behind socially. I know I don't change much and can get grumpy but this is more.

With him starting school I'm getting more worried about our failure to help redirect his aggression, and worried about his school mates as well as him potentially being isolated without more support also being provided.
His foundation teachers I think will be good ( his sister goes there) but thinking long term.

Any hints or tips to go from here would be very much appreciated.

[milothemonkey]

I think it's great you are so attentive to his behaviours. Many of his behaviours still seem within normal range for his age. What are his language skills like? Sounds like he is struggling to communicate his needs? Does he have any sensory issues?

Maybe it's worth speaking to a developmental paediatrician.

It's great you are trying to support him. There is a very aggressive chikd in my son's class and school haven't had a clue how to deal with him and his parents don't seem to know how to address him. He has been ostracised and labelled as naughty buy I'm pretty sure there's more going on. Work very closely with the school. You could suggest a communication book where they describe the triggers to hitting or what he's struggling with.