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Dd 10 with awful anxiety

(6 Posts)
TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince Mon 13-Jun-16 20:27:04

I don't know whether to go to school or go to the doctors. She's always been anxious, likes to know what's happening next, and struggles with transistion from one thing to another. She's also extremely hardworking and conscientious.

But she gets so stressed. Massive meltdowns about homework. It has to be done on a certain day, at a certain time, or she just can't cope. She found starting Year 5 very hard. Too much noise and switching activities, although she has calmed down a bit.

Now she's convinced she can't sleep, and is working herself up into a right state every evening. It's very hard, but l love her so much l just want to help her. She just sits there with tears spilling out of her eyes.

She will move to secondary in about 16 months and I am worried it will blow her mind. So do I go to school, or to the doctors? Is this normal behaviour for a 10 year old.

I just don't know what to do 😰

minxthemanx Mon 13-Jun-16 20:33:47

I've got a girl just like this in year 6 class. Has a history of anxiety, and at beginning of year was really struggling; homework, literacy, simple tasks caused her so much worry. Needed loads of reassurance all the time. Was kicking off at home, even started mild self harming. She is finishing year 6 calm and delightful. She had some counseling through camhs (referred by gp). Plus we did a lot of cognitive behavior type stuff in school with her. I do feel for you ; get help. Go to GP and into school to see teacher and senCo. It can get better x

minxthemanx Mon 13-Jun-16 20:35:20

And re sleep; herbal nytol for a couple of nights to break the cycle.

MrsC24 Sat 18-Jun-16 08:42:02

My ds aged 10 yr 6 has been referred to the anxiety pathway through CAMHS and if he meets the criteria (done through a multichoice questionnaire that doesn't allow you to say exactly what the issues are), there is a 2 year waiting list!! So much for all this focus on the mental health of children. I think the schools are expected to be experts and if your child is in a school does not have the resourses then you are left on your own to deal with it. Speak to the school and they can refer to CAMHS or GP.

mrbear444 Sat 18-Jun-16 19:23:39

Hi I work with children who have ASD or autism and what you describe are very common symptoms of this. Go to your GP armed with a list of all the examples you have given above with specific times and look to see what her triggers are too. You should ask for a referral to a paediatrician and or get an educational psychologist report, you may have to pay for the latter so go for the GP referral first. Good luck!

OfstedAintEverything Thu 11-Aug-16 22:45:20

All the above posts sound very sensible.

It's worth thinking about self-help books also (simply because there can be quite a wait for CAMHS input). We were recommended "starving the anxiety gremlin" (it's on Amazon). Ignore the slightly hideous title: it's aimed at 10-15 year olds and is a practical workbook which explains to children directly what anxiety is, how common it can be, and practical things to do about reducing it. It has wordsearches, puzzles and "my experience" fill In boxes.
The chapters are short and it looks very approachable. We're using it this summer.

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