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does my son have ADHD? And what to do about it?

(2 Posts)
somewherebecomingrain Fri 11-Mar-16 02:53:34

I've always known my boy was a bit of a whirling dervish. When he was tiny he got bored of his toys incredibly quickly. He did however paradoxically have amazing attention for puzzles.

We left it really late to impose discipline because I wasn't sure he actually understood discipline. Eventually it was clear he did and we are now very firm with him (he still takes ages to hear what we say but we know he uncderstands it and the issues at stake).

In reception he was always wandering off in the middle of learning activities but they took a benign attitude to it. In Y1 they said he needs to 'produce more' but by the end of the year they were happy with his progress. Now he's in Y2 and the school are saying he's a year behind, he's got 'focus' problems, has become stroppy and difficult, and are asking us to work with the SENCO.

At home I find he can occasionally do his schoolwork efficiently but mainly it takes much longer than it should. He jumps up and down, gurns, chants throughout and has to be constantly reminded to keep going.

I've done various online questionnaires and ADHD description certainly fits our son. But isn't part of the problem with ADHD that it describes normal childhood traits?

DH says he's normal and its the education reforms that are turning up the heat unfairly. There is evidence for this and its a view others share.

I feel we need to work out what's going on.

I've asked for an appointment with the SENCO and his teacher with blurry consent from my husband but he does know what I think - i've not given in on the issue.

I'm not saying my son definitely has a condition or definitely doesnt. I just think that if he does and we ignore it thats as bad as if he doesn't and we go in really hard. And vice versa.

Just wondering if others have been in this position - some ambiguity, reluctant dad, wanting best for son etc

Flanks Fri 11-Mar-16 14:36:02

ADHD is one of the most problematic diagnoses, largely for reasons you and your husband have already expressed. Questionnaires for it are far less useful than for other specific difficulties, again for the reasons you express.

The issue you may come up against, is to what degree is his attention less focused? If he can bring his attention to bear for a sustained period of time in any situation, subject or activity, then ADHD becomes less likely and you begin the discussion about 'severity' or 'spectrum', which in the case of ADHD is problematic.

Is he a Summer born child? If so, this may be an issue also in terms of his ability to access the curriculum.

Depending on what the SENCO says, you may have more luck finding useful information through a paediatrician, as well as better questionnaires.

Best of luck supporting your son smile

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