School Disaster _ Help!!

[shaz298]

Hi,

Well everything seemed to go great with Luuk's new school. Even managed to get his bottom cleaning issues sorted without much trouble but now we have a biggie to deal with.

In 2 weeks Luuk has been assaulted 4 tines by one boy in the class. Now I am not annoyed at this wee boy in the least. He has no diagnosis but even I can see there is some kind of sensory issue going on. Had to be removed from assembly because he couldn't cope with everyone singing ( I witnessed this one) and became angry, the 4 occasions he's hit Luuk have been transition from playground - classroom or in the cloakroom i.e very crowded and potentially very noisy with all the children there together.

It seems he is hitting lots of children every day so Luuk is not alone. I am fuming. In 5 years Luuk has never been assaulted and now 4 times in 2 weeks. I don't have a problem with the wee boy. I do have aproble with how the adults are (not) managing him.

After the 3rd incident I was advised that 1-1 worker was going in to work with little boy. However it still happened yesterday, but knowing the circumstances I believe it was poor organisation and lack of thought which resulted in the incident which could have easily been prevented. Add to that that Luuk has full time 1-1, so what was she doing when these situations happened????

I came home in tears yesterday. I can't bear the thought of sending Luuk to school every day when there is a big change he's going to be smacked in the face or worse. Spoke to our Ed hoe visitor who advised e to eail the head, which I did. I even suggested using Luuk's 1-1 for those difficult ties to be with the other boy as she was still in effect protecting Luuk. I kept it positive but being clear that the situation was completely unacceptable.

Well the head phoned went on about having to have same conversation with other parents ( Duh..... that's what she is paid for and parents aren't happy that their children are being assaulted on a daily basis!). Told me it's not bullying ( implying that it was ok then?) and tried to tell me that I shouldn't use the word assault as it was too strong a word. Eh what would she call it if, due to this situation I became so frustrated that I slapped her in the face??? GRRRRRRRRRR!

She has said that they have discussed the suport for the wee boy again and are changing things daily to try and resolve situation. That' s great if it works and I really hope it does. The wee boy is a really lovely wee boy who just obviously has some difficulties.

I have had to fight with my hubby to allow me to send Luuk to school today. He is fuming.

My plan is to go and speak to the little boy's mum ( it was her who told me about the incident yesterday and she was mortified - it's not her fault) and suggest they maybe get together out of school. It won't help with the bigger issue involving all the children but may help if he has a relationship with Luuk and he may not be so inclined to hit him.

Also plan on telling his 1-1 that I expect her to be between Luuk and this wee boy at particular times where he is likely to be struggling.

Anyone any more advice on this one. If it doesn't get any better I'll be going to his review on 1st Oct quoting UN Convention on Right of Child and other such legislation.

You may think that I'm a but OTT but unfortunately for Luuk if he gets a punch or kick to the abdomen it could kill him so this is a HUGE worry for us. I understand thar things happen and we can't protect him fro everything. However the school have a responsibility to protect him from known risks.

Sorry for the rant at this time of day but I am so struggling with this. My parent instinct is to keep him home, but he loves school. How long that will continue if he keeps getting hit though is anybody's guess.

Thanks for reading. Well done if you got this far .

Sharon xx

[colditz]

Bloody hell, you are being VERY understanding.

My idea is to KEEP going to the head, and to quote this at her.

Children have the right to be safe and protected WHEREEVER they are, and a school that is not compliant with the safeguarding of children act is complicit in neglect. And I would tell her that, too.

[PositiveAttitude]

Shaz I dont know what problem's Luuk has which means that he is in more danger than others if kicked etc, but I do understand as DD would be the same as she has an abdominal abnormality.
Therefore, the school are failing to keep him safe and you need to put your foot down.

I would also seriously reconsider gettingthe boys together outside of school. IME this can cause even more problems and can get you in situations that are very difficult to get out of without hurting people's feelings!

Is parent partnership any good in your area. I would phone thema nd get advice from them.

I hope it improves.

[Aitch]

i think you are being understanding as well, your boy has a right to feel safe in his school. of course it's not the boy's mum's fault, particularly as she is absent at the time, but the school is in loco parentis to all of the children and must have strategies in place to safeguard them all.

[shaz298]

Hi Colditz,

Thanks for that. Soething else to add to the arsenal of Un Convention on the right sof the child ( article 19) and child protection legisltation.

Believe me my patience has now run out and if he is assaulted ( and that is what it is, plain and simple) then I will be hitting the with this, informing the Education Officer and may even get the children's rights worker involved. Think that should do it?

Cheers

Sharon x

[shaz298]

Hi All, you all posted while I was replying to Colditz. Sorry.

Positive Attitude : Luuk's internal anatoy is copletely wonky. Had an exomphalos at burth but nothing is whetre is should be and is not a straight left-right swap. His liver sits in his lower abdomen and is only protected by muscle therfor a sharp kick or punch to the tummy could rupture his liver and that would be the end of him.

Aitch: I absolutely agree. His safety is their responsibility and they are failing.

We'll see what happens today

Thanks for the support everyone. Feel like I'm ging just a litle bit mad, well madder than before

[Aitch]

you are not going mad, and do not let the school even remotely suggest that you are.

[PositiveAttitude]

Hi again, My DD was born with bladder extrophy, so abdomen all open and inside-out ish!! So similar-ish. Definitely need to make him safe!!! Its not ajust a case of being a worried mum, ANY child should feel safe, but when the consequences are lifethreatening its stupid for the school to try and fob you off!!!!
I'd be livid!!!