Should I bother with a sling/carrier for second child

[Pansy0926]

DS1 will be just over 2 years old when our baby is due, and I've been wondering how I'm going to manage with 2 kids so young. At the moment I wouldn't trust DS1 not to accidentally hurt a baby, and we live in a tiny one bed flat so it's hard to section off a space where baby's rocker can sit out of his reach, though I will still do it. I was wondering whether getting a sling or carrier could help? Then i could tend to the 2 year old while baby is happy in a sling? DS1 hated his stretchy wrap we had until he was a few months old. He liked to have his space and didn't like being wrapped up against me. However, if baby number 2 does turn out to like a sling or carrier, does anyone have experience of whether this actually helps when you have a toddler to wrangle at the same time? Does the toddler get upset if you always are holding the baby? Is baby more likely to get whacked accidentally by the toddler if they are in a sling? Is it harder physically to get on with housework or care for the toddler when a baby is on your chest? With my first child, I really enjoyed having him bounce around in his chair or play pen while I got on with housework, but I'might a bit paranoid my 2 year old will dump a heavy toy on the baby. Sorry if that sounds a bit weird but I'm not sure how toddlers are with babies, and if it's anything like how mine tries to treat the cat when it's in reach, I'd be worried. Or maybe by that time he will have grown out of it? I managed to get him to leave the cat alone for a good few months but suddenly he always is trying to catch it's tail... At the moment I keep worrying I'm not going to cope with 2, I found it hard enough with 1 last time!

[TwoDrifters]

I have no advice Pansy as I only have one DS myself but I'll be watching with interest as we are hoping to have another with about this age gap and many of your worries and concerns are mine too! I hope some others have some good advice and/or experiences to share!

[glitterglitters]

I've bought a connecta for #2 in order to avoid the double pushchair. I think with #1 I was pushed into a stretchy sling which I didn't like but this time I think it'll be a case of making it work for my own life.

[Sweetpotatoaddict]

My ds was like yours, dd however loved being in the stretchy. Generally dd slept in the sling while I got on with chores while ds napped in the afternoon. The rest of the time she slept in the carrycot which I kept on a stand inside a playpen. My age gap is 19 months, however ds is now 2.5 yr and what a difference in his behaviour and understanding.

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

My DS was a real '4th trimester' baby and practically lived in a stretchy wrap for months! I found I could get on with most household stuff when carrying (though I did drop a jar of jam on his head once ) but things which involved bending down were harder so it might be hard to do toddler play etc.

I'm expecting DC2 shortly so no experience of juggling two yet - if I have another 4th trimester one I am sure it'll be a lifesaver. However I am hoping that this one might tolerate being put down occasionally!

My DS also torments our poor cat so I am worried as well about how he'll treat the baby!

I am praying for an easy going baby that will be happy on a playmat/bouncer as well as in a sling for maximum flexibility!

[Redkite10a]

I have a 21 month age gap and found I used a sling a lot more with DC2 than I did with DC1. She was refluxy so we couldn't put her down for more than about 5 min anyway but I also found it much easier with my toddler. He was fascinated with her and wanted to pick her up if she was on the floor, and bounce her so hard her head went flying in the bouncy chair. She wouldn't go in a moses basket but there is no way I'd have left her in one with him there!

In the sling she was protected and I had my arms free to play with him and do stuff. He didn't seem to mind her being there in the sling, I guess he'd got used to the bump being in between us. I have a friend with a similar age gap whose DS completely ignored the baby though, so it will depend on your child. Good luck!

[usefultoken]

Carrying ds2 in a sling was a godsend to me, for the reasons you say. Also it was just great generally, as if he had a clingy day I could just carry on with him happily snuggled. I also carried him on my back as soon as he could hold his head up. I had a few different types (inexpensive) over the years. I started off with a wrap when he was on my front, but quite quickly went to more of a a baby carrier with clips and stuff that I could use front and back. Used that for about 2 years, and now have one that's like a huge scarf with a buckle that he can sit on my hip or back if he gets tired while walking.