9 mo waking up 1 hr after bed time and impossible to settle, what is going on?

[M78]

My 9 month old DD used to go to sleep at 6.30 and then sometimes she would sleep through to 5.30, but more often she would wake up a couple of times and settle quite easily with shush an patting. For the last week she has been waking up crying about 1hr after going to sleep ( she falls asleep on the bottle) and it takes me 2hrs to settle her again, she will only fall asleep laying on top of me and will scream as soon as I try to put her in her cot. Normally DH would go to her in the evening if she wakes up and up to now he has had no problems settling her, but now she goes mad if DH goes in and will scream histerically until I take over. What is going on? She is not teething and she is really happy and calm during the day. Naps have been a bit of the problem as it takes ages to get her to sleep, but she would normally have 1 morning nap of 1hr and an afternoon one of 45 min. I don?t know what to do, part of me thinks that I should just wait and see if it stops, but it is affecting DD1 (8 yr) as the evening time is our ?special time? together and I really do not want her to feel neglected in any way. Has anyone experienced this and what did you do?

[bippyhippy]

The only thing I know about this is that babies should go to bed awake. If they are asleep when you put them down then they will wake up screaming because they don't know where they are, or where you are.

That is the advice i have read and have followed. But it's easier said than done.

[M78]

I am not sure what to do next really, should I put her to bed awake and then shush and pat? We have tried a couple of times in the past and she just screamed and screamed until I gave in, I really hate listening to her crying, it makes me feel physically unwell....

[Hannah17]

The only thing I would suggest is maybe an earlier bedtime? I know my DD (16 months) does this sometimes on the nights when she goes to bed overtired. If we put her to bed earlier (sometimes before 6pm!) she tends to have a better nights sleep and still wake at the same time (between 5 and 5.30am). Also, agree with bibbyhippy, I know it is hard but try rousing her slightly before you put her in her cot so that she is slightly awake. Good luck, I've found it does get easier once you have cracked the going to bed slightly awake stage.

[AngelDog]

Sounds like the 9 month sleep regression - see here, here and here.

Not much you can do about it if it is - I'd just do whatever it takes to hang in there till it passes. Could you try explaining to your DD about how babies struggle to sleep when their brains are learning how to do exciting new things?

[M78]

Thanks for your replies,I will talk to DD1,I think that having been an only child for quite a long time, she is finding it difficult to share my attention with her sister even if she relly adores her and helps out a lot. Will just keep doing what I have been doing and hopefully it will pass soon!

[AngelDog]

M78, I just read your post again and waking up an hour after bedtime was something my DS did when he was in the 4 month regression. I posted on here and several people came and said their DCs had been the same at that age. Most of them had the same problem as you - it took forever to settle them again afterwards, (although that wasn't a problem for DS). They all said that it just stopped happening, which was also the case with my DS.

I see it must be difficult for your DD1. Perhaps you or DH could try to give her some extra attention at other points in the day, e.g. the morning or when she comes home from school. Even if it's only 5 mins of you putting the baby down specifically so you can have an 'extra' cuddle/story/whatever with DD1 it might help get over this difficult patch.