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Sleeping in our bed

(7 Posts)
oliveoil Tue 03-Jun-03 13:10:14

My daughter of 7 months goes off to sleep by herself at around 7pm and I don't hear a peep until around 3am ish, then around 4ish she wakes up and 'sings' to herself. This wakes me up and so I can have those needed extra hours, I bring her to bed with us until around 7am. She has no probs getting herself to sleep in the day or night but I have been told that I will be making problems for myself when she gets older and should just leave her...there is no way I can do control crying so what does anyone else think? Did your child sleep in your bed and how are things? Advice needed!!!!

nobby Tue 03-Jun-03 13:21:23

Oliveoil It's only making problems for yourself if you will want her to sleep in her own bed again soon. A friend of mine happily had her daughter sleep with her off and on until she was four-ish. She loved it and missed her when it stopped.

I didn't want my ds doing it so have always been pretty strict and only had him in my bed occasionally - ill, bad dreams etc - if he really needed me.

If she's just singing could you get some ear plugs and put them in when she starts? If she's not crying then you could see how long she lasts. It may be worth 2 or 3 nights' interrupted sleep to break the early waking habit?

Claireandrich Tue 03-Jun-03 13:22:40

Our DD did this until January/February time when she was about 10 months old, she then decided to sleep through. We did nothing different to normal - she just did. Now she usually sleeps through to about 6ish, sometimes later. If I am not at work I still bring her into my bed then for an extra hour or two. Every so often she goes through stages of waking again, like when she was teething and recently when poorly. But she goes back to her own routine again once okay.

Like you, I couldn't face CC and she had no problems going to sleep in the evening anyway. And I needed my sleep to function proprly the next day. I think if you are OK with her in your bed then don't worry about it, she will sort herself out later. Don't forget to enjoy the cuddles too - I kind of miss them now!

oliveoil Tue 03-Jun-03 13:26:49

Yes, I do love the cuddles which is probably why I take her into bed as I went back to work recently, maybe I want the closeness. Also, person who gave me the 'you will have problems' advice is very strict and by the GF book method, which I tried and didn't enjoy. Each to their own I think, no right or wrong way maybe??

Claireandrich Tue 03-Jun-03 13:47:52

Oliveoil - I agree - no one way is right or wrong, you have to just do what is best for you. But don't worry about not going back in there own bed. Our DD did easily - she slept with us for part of most nights from birth to 6 weeks, and then from 18 weeks to about 10 months. Now she actually prefers her own bed!

Also my sister co-slept with my mum and dad when she was little. Her crying used to wake me and my c=brother up and mum didn't want it interfereing with our school (we were 9 and 10). She slept on and off with them 'till she was about 18 months and then choose to sleep in her own bed.

Often it is those who haven't co-slept who want of the risks of it (I mean of not sleeping on own again, etc.). Many parents who do try it often don't report some of these problems though.

outofpractice Thu 05-Jun-03 10:48:57

oliveoil, I can totally understand where you are coming from, if you have just gone back to work. Definitely each to their own, and my experience is that you aren't making problems for yourself. I never did controlled crying. My ds slept in my bed (although lots of space in bed as no man in the bed!) till 3. We both had a good uninterrupted sleep that way and felt close. As he got bigger, we bought a bed for him in his room and nice bed clothes, and talked about being a big boy, wriggling too much and keeping me awake. He learnt within a week to sleep in his own bed, with various teddies. He only comes to my bed for a cuddle after my alarm clock has gone off and sometimes we still have a weekend afternoon nap together in my bed.

oliveoil Thu 05-Jun-03 11:46:07

It's good to know I am not doing the 'wrong' thing, then again, I have no idea what I am doing on any parent related topic but my dd seems to be thriving! Must learn to just go with my own instincts I reckon. Thanks.

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