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Has anyone tried cc in the night/v early morning?

(24 Posts)
melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 13:56:45

Help!

I'm going round in circles here, really would appreciate some advice.

Dd2 is 17 months and goes to bed at 7 brilliantly. She goes off on her own and does for her morning nap too. She'll nap at 9/10ish for maybe up to 2 hours.

Unfortunately, she wakes really really early. Normally at 5ish but this morning it was 3.20 and it's not the first time.

This has been going on for months and we thought it was maybe just the summer months and she'd get better with blackouts and darker mornings.

At the moment, dh will try picking her up and putting her down if it's before 5am but frequently she'll just cry louder. If I go anywhere her that's it, she's up for the day.

Even when you can see she's so tired, she won't give in to it.

If we didn't have dd1 who I'm worried about waking, I'd have tried cc months ago but we're now getting desperate.

Can it work? Or have we left it too late?

PrincessToadstool Tue 25-Aug-09 14:03:48

Have you tried wake-to-sleep?

I think the general idea is that you go in and gently disturb her an hour before her normal waking time - so 4am. Not completely, but stroke her cheek, re-tuck in the blankets etc. And in doing so you break her sleep-cycle and (in theory) she will then sleep later.

I am sure someone mroe knowledgable will post.

But I think CC for early wakings is a bit unfair tbh, it is not her fault if she is waking for the day that early.

melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 14:14:12

I was reading a thread about wake to sleep the other day. I'm just so scared of waking her up at 4 and that's it.

Dh said he's willing to give it a go but the only time he set the alarm to do it, she was awake at 3 anyway. sad

We need to do something, I am increasingly unable to function getting up this early.

Then I read things about people being tired as they've been up since 6 and I'm so bloody jealous!

Thanks though, will look into and consider it again.

colditz Tue 25-Aug-09 14:15:42

This sounds obvious, but easily overlooked in the quest for the perfect sleeping child - has she got access to a drink?

I wake up 2 or three times a night for half a cup of water. I always have. If it's not there, I have to fetch it or I am so thirsty I can't sleep.

PrincessToadstool Tue 25-Aug-09 14:16:07

Does she only have one nap a day? If so 9/10 is early (probably because of waking early I suppose)

what if you kept her up until 12 for a few days on the trot?

PrincessToadstool Tue 25-Aug-09 14:17:37

Yes colditz makes a good point, I drink during the night too. So if DS wakes up the first thing we do is offer water but I am surprised when he doesn't want any, can't imagine 12 hours with nothing.

also is anything disturbing her - someone leavnig for work early, birds, that kind of thing? do you have blackout blinds?

melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 14:39:18

Colditz, I hadn't even considered that as I wake thirsty sometimes but always go back to sleep before I have time to do anything about it!Will try leaving a sippy cup of water in there.

PrincesToadstool. Yes, i agree it is an early nap, she's just so grizzly through tiredness that I have to put her up. This is where the perpetual circle comes in to play!

We have blackout blinDs. The birds are definately noisy but can't do anything about that. It's not at the same time every morning so guessing that might not be it. No one gets up early, 7 would be our rising time if we could choose!

I'm thinking of trying to give her a 2nd nap {this'll only happen if we go out in the car and I'll have to keep poking dd1 with a long stick so she doesn't go to sleep too! I think then we could push bedtime back and see if that helps.

It's so hard though. When she's had later bedtimes before they've always coincided with the earliest mornings.

I'm assuming cc is definately out then.

<<gutted there's not going to be a quick solution>>

PrincessToadstool Tue 25-Aug-09 14:51:05

Oh I meant someone in the street, just thinking of our house, DS is at the front and we're at the back so if e.g. my neighbour was a milkman, we wouldn't hear him but DS might.

Do you have curtains over the blinds - overkill, perhaps but double-layering did help here a bit.

I don't know enough about CC and haven't done it myself, but perhaps it would work. I just think that if it's her body clock or rhythm you might be adding stress to an already difficult situation.

A second nap may help... I believe that sleep breeds sleep. DS has the better nights when his daytime sleep has been more peaceful, longer. If he has a short nap I just know he will a) be harder to settle at night and b) probably get up earlier too.

I would certainly be keen to try gentler methods before resorting to CC, but at this age I can completely understand the appeal. My DS was a really shit sleeper for so long and I was just convinced it would get better by 12 months so when it didn't I wasn't sure whether to feel cheated or resigned to it.

melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 16:29:13

I can't remember when or why I dropped the 2nd nap. Have tried to re instate it this afternoon but she's having none of it. Just got back from a drive to see if it'd work but it didn't.

Will try again tomorrow.

We're on a mainish road so I think it's a bit noisy, but I don't think there are any sudden noises iyswim.

Maybe you're right with the natural bodyclock thing.

I've been going to bed at 9 but may start going even earlier, dh won't be pleased!!

Orissiah Tue 25-Aug-09 16:31:30

PrincessToadstool - at what age did your DS get better at sleeping? Mine wakes any time between 6 and 7am which during a work week is fine as we have to be up by 6.30am anyway, but a 7 or 7.30 wake up on weekends would be nice :-)

Melmog - I know you have another DC, but if you're willing to try it then most people I know who have tried CC (either gradual retreat or out and out CIO) have had success with it for early morning waking (at least before 5.30am. From 5.30am onwards, I think it's harder).

bloss Tue 25-Aug-09 16:43:53

Message withdrawn

PrincessToadstool Tue 25-Aug-09 17:24:51

Orissiah my DS got better (by which I mean sleeping through!) at 18 months - he is pretty reliable now but when the wakings are only occasional it seems much easier to deal with.

He does have the odd early start and whereas he used to be happy to snuggle in with me, now he thinks my bed is a place for jumping hmm but on the whole it's alright, I do feel a lot better in myself than I did 5/6 months ago.

melmog it is hard when they'll only nap once, DS dropped his second nap at around 12 months, he will meltdown rather than sleep again, no matter how tired he is hmm

melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 18:11:10

Orissiah and Bloss, that's encouraging! Will talk to dh, come to a plan and warn the neighbours if we're going to do it.

PrincessToadstool, is there anything more frustrating than a tired baby/toddler who won't sleep?! I just don't get it. I'd give anything to have someone tuck me up and let me have a sleep.

Crazycatlady Tue 25-Aug-09 18:15:18

Could you try shortening her first nap and then putting her down for another nap later in the day? She might be more inclined to take an afternoon nap if she's only had say 45 mins in the morning. She probably won't like it for a few days but may quickly adjust.

For some reason I have found that if DD has a long-ish first nap she then wakes earlier the next day.

melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 18:36:38

It's worth a try Crazycatlady. I'll try anything at this stage.

I think we're going to have to start making notes as we both forget nap times and wake up times so it's easy to miss a pattern.

Thanks

jammietart Tue 25-Aug-09 18:54:07

Is there anything which will get her back off to sleep when she wakes early? Milk feed, cuddles, pacing, buggy? If you could get her back to sleep until closer to 6 you could push her nap back to lunchtime keep bedtime to a strict 7 and maybe after a few weeks her body clock will adjust?

Easier said than done though!

melmog Tue 25-Aug-09 19:19:52

Cuddling me on the sofa will lull her back to sleep, but she has an inbuilt tilt mechanism so putting her back in the cot is a no no.

I did that this morning but it meant I was sat upright with her asleep on me from before 4 til 5.30 when I tried to put her back in bed and she woke up screaming again.

Because it's not a deep sleep for her she was still overtired when we all got up at 6.

And I'm so fed up of sitting upright and trying to sleep!

We got into a terrible habit of putting her in the travel cot with her milk and baby tv if she woke after 5, as it kept her quiet til dd1 woke at 6.

Don't want to go down that road at 3.30 though.

Thanks jammietart, all advice is very gratefully recieved, I'm noting all these down so we can cross them off the list!!

Orissiah Wed 26-Aug-09 08:38:52

My DD is 14 months and usually naps for 1-1.5 hours just after lunch (around 1 or 1.30pm). If she's at home playing then she doesn't nap in the morning (stopped napping in the morning when she turned 1) but if she's in the buggy out and about then she usually (but not always) drops off around 10.30 for 30 minutes. I had noticed that the longer she napped in the morning eg from 9.30 or 10am the earlier she woke up in the morning so we try to keep her awake all morning or rouse her after 30 mins or so.

Try limiting the morning nap and see what happens.

And if you try CC be consistent and give it several days - do not give in after 2 or 3 days or it may not work.

Orissiah Wed 26-Aug-09 08:41:05

I forgot to say that pick up put down didn't work for us either - DD was MORE stimulated by the cuddles/contact. If we had to go in and check on her then it was perfunctory and little communication and generally we left her in the cot. It's worked for us and she's such a happy little thing.

ronshar Wed 26-Aug-09 08:51:28

My DS is 10 months and his sleep is rubbish. I tried feeding, cuddles, in bed with me. Nothing stopped him waking up at bang on 3.10 every morning. Eventually I did a mixture of CC and a tiny bit of CIO.
I'm not a fan of either but my DS is a stubborn little monkey and he had to get used to the idea that dark is not play time. Pick up put down didnt work he just got more upset.

It is only in the last 2 weeks that he has managed 2-3 consecutive all night sleeps.
You have to be prepared to do it for at least 7 nights minimum or it wont work.
Good luck.
PS TV is never a good idea if you want children to sleep in the evening or the morning. It is a brain stimulant.

melmog Wed 26-Aug-09 09:48:07

Ronshar, I know the tv was a stupid idea. It just gave dh and I another precious, precious hour or two in bed.

We've come to some sort of decision anyway, thanks everyone for all the advice.

I'm going to limit and try and stop the morning nap starting today. She is on sofa grizzling and rubbing eyes so think waking her up after 30 mins will be happening soon.

Hopefully that will encourage an afternoon nap instead.

Hopefully bedtime will stay at 7 and stay wonderful.

She will then sleep til 6 or 7.

If she wakes in the early, silly hours, dh will pick up put down but I will not go anywhere near her.

If this doesn't sort it, we will do cc then cio.

Hurrah!

Orissiah Wed 26-Aug-09 09:57:29

Good luck Melmog! Keep is updated and stick at it :-)

melmog Wed 26-Aug-09 10:02:49

Thanks. I feel much better just having a plan.

smile

melmog Fri 28-Aug-09 06:41:15

It must be a fluke.....!

Wednesday night went like clockwork but she was up at 3 and I ended up sleeping on the sofa with her. Rubbish.

But...

Limited her morning nap to 30 mins, she had an afternoon nap for an hour and a half {the first in ages}, bedtime was like normal at 7 and she didn't wake up til ten past five!!

I know that's still early and not so long ago I was complaining as it was so early, but it's not as bad as three!

Thanks for all the advice, we're very grateful!
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