Don't actually know which "problem" to solve first...can you help?

[AddisonMontgomerySheppard]

DS is 13.5 months old and used to sleep well but for the last three months he has ended up in our bed from around midnight. My parents and PILs are horrified by this and I would quite like to have a proper night's sleep all of us, though I do love snuggling up with DS in the night.

He used to wake 2 or 3 times a night wanting boob (and actually opening my top to get to them and once he reached a year, I slowly gave up breastfeeding and moved to bottles.

He now wakes 3 times a night between midnight and 5.30 to 6. I give him a bottle as a quick way back to sleep.

He eats quite well during the day so I'm sure this is just comfort/greed.

I have a wind-down routine, playtime, bathtime, stories (sometimes he'll watch In The Night Garden if his "lunchtime" nap has been quite late and he doesn't seem sleepy enough)

He goes to sleep in my arms (another "problem", I suppose, I would LOVE to leave the lullabies on and him settle himself...) and then I transfer him to his cot around 7.30.

He'll sometimes wake again around 9/10pm and need a quick cuddle to get back to sleep then in his cot.

Then any time between 11 and 1 he'll wake up and I'll generally bring him back to bed as it's easier and I know I can cuddle him easily and we'll all get some sleep.

I tried CC and PU/PD at 10 months but admit I am quite weak-willed - easy to do PU/PD at 7pm, much harder at 1am when he will just go straight back to sleep in my bed.....

Thanks for reading this far!

I guess what I wanna know is: -

Should we work on the milk drinking/sleeping through thing in our bed (and if so HOW?!) and then assume (!) the sleeping in his own bed will come?

OR can/do I need to do it all in one go? (again if so HOW?)

Again, thanks for reading. Any tips greatly appreciated.

[AliandHerScallywag]

Addison that sounds tough. I would recommend this book to you. I bought a secondhand version via amazon which saved a few pounds. The book is good because it has various flow charts for diagnosing the source of the problem(s), and the has solutions for a variety of ages. It is also not wedded to a single method of sleep training, so if cc isn't for you they have alternatives. It helped me hugely with my DS who waking hourly when he was 8 months old. Last night (now 10 months) he went for 10.5 hours in his own cot .

I think the book will help you sort it out more than any suggestions I could make. Hope that helps.

Love your name BTW

[marmoset]

Addison - You must be exhausted (even if you don't know it!).My dd is younger at 6m but I'm just working through a 2 week plan to change her sleeping patterns and it is working so you definitely need one!

I haven't seen that book AHS but that looks a good place to start. MY dd was up every 1.5-2 hours too until Operation Slumber.

My HV was absolutely right though when she said that you need to get your baby used to going to sleep in one place and soothing himself if he wakes up. She said, 'wouldn't you find it odd if you went to sleep in your bed but then woke up somewhere different like the kitchen floor? You'd want to get back to where you started - same with babies who lull off in one place only to wake up 'somewhere strange.'

Good luck