What is pick up, put down?(20 Posts)
I've seen it mentioned on several threads as a way of getting babies to sleep better, but what actually is it? And does it work? - what happens? Do you use it overnight or for getting to bed at night or naps or what?
It's Tracey Hogg Baby whisperer method...it can be used for all types of sleep. TBh, I find it a bit Emperor's New Clothes in that the idea is that baby cries, you pick 'em up, stops crying, you put em down. Hardly rocket science really! (TH's theory being that each time they will be down for longer and they will be secure knowing that should they cry, they will get picked up)
It is just as Bucharest says - baby cries, you pick them up til they calm down then put them down again. I used it on my DS though and it does work - he was a bad sleeper, up 10+ times a night and now regularly sleeps 7pm to 6am. It suited me as I didn't have to leave him crying but was a way of getting him to self settle - you put them down as soon as they're calm ratehr than holding them til fast asleep (which is what I had been doing).
Took a couple of weeks and I was picking up/putting down for sometimes an hour but since then he has been much happier and we're all a lot better for the unbroken sleep.
I used this method with my dd and loved it, it worked wonders. Like joandmax at the start I was sometimes standing next to her cot for up to an hour and just constantly picking up really tiring. But each day the frequency went down till after a few days she was just going to sleep by herself without crying.
JoandMax & fellowmum, how old were your ds & dd when you did this?
Worked really well for us too. Did it on DD at 5 months and she's slept through from 6 months.
I have used this method since DD was about 11 weeks old. (she's 6 mo now) and after about 3 nights of doing it, she started sleeping 7:30pm til about 06:30 with a 'dreamfeed' at 11pm. I loved this whole Baby Whisperer method. (was recommended by someone here on MN) It can take a few nights to see good results, but if you stick to it, it is so much better than leaving them to 'cry it out'
Tracey Hogg does say not to use it til your baby is at least 4 months old. Not criticising you duchess, just to give the OP info.
I starting using it when dd was about 8 months old till then she used to fall asleep on bottle (I know v.bad) but when that wasn't working anymore is when this method saved us.
We also used to do a dream feed at 11pm and it was brilliant meant dd slept from 7.00pm till 6.00pm without waking up.
Someone on MN recommended BW to me last week so I bought her "solves all your problems" book and found it made sense though I was sceptical. Shush/pat worked in about 2 minutes on DD for all her naps yesterday & today so far. I couldn't believe it. Until yesterday I was used to 10-15 minutes of crying in my arms before she'd fall asleep. She doesn't cry at all with shush/pat. Changed my whole day yesterday!
Thanks all - it is basically what it sounds like then! It sounds almost too simple though. I worry DS (5 months) would just work himself up.
Resurrecting this thread, hope you don't mind, OP.
As I type, DH is trying pick-up-put-down with DD (9 months).
Bed time started at 7 tonight (usually between 6.30 and 7) with her usual routine:
Top and tail, nappy, pyjamas, story, winding down, feed, in the dark and quiet.
She often falls asleep while feeding and this is what we'd like to help move past. She is BF, won't have a bottle, which means only I can ever put her to bed. I have to go out once a week to run a Guide and Brownie unit, so DH needs to be able to settle DD to sleep. Last week I had to come home early because she went into meltdown when he tried giving her ebm from a bottle. She has had a bottle before, but now she just chews it.
She also needs to learn how to settle because she will be starting nursery in December when I go back to work.
It's taking longer and longer to BF her to sleep anyway.
My question is what is defined as crying? Actual sobbing crying, or grumble-moaning? It's difficult to explain. Should we pick her up as soon as she makes a noise which sounds unhappy?
Listening through the monitor and this has been going on for 45 minutes so far. I know it can take a long time to start with, but I'm not sure we're doing it right!
The reason DH is doing it is because DD just wants to feed from me if I pick her up. She isn't hungry, it's just her usual way of getting to sleep.
So far we have been going for 2 hours picking up and putting down. we are all getting very frustrated! Still not sure if we're doing it right...
Dear Pookamoo, Ive had trouble with my 4months old sleeping, and considering starting PU/PD BW method. How did it work out for you?
With my son, I started off leaving the grumble moaning, but then he would sometimes get really worked up, so I switched to picking up when he made a moaning noise, any kind of unhappiness. We're down from about an hour of PU/PDs to just 3ish in a couple of weeks. Yes it's taking a long time, but I tried leaving him in the crib while he cried with my hand on him to show I was there, and it was awful, so this is a lot easier for me.
I know I cant bear him crying for long, with real tears and everything! The problem is even when I pick him up he's still crying, and the only way to stop is by rocking him... but thats not allowed, right?
I dunno I'm not sure you need to stick so precisely. I pat his bottom which seems to work well to calm him - as another sleep guru says, babies can't concentrate on much as a time, so if you give them something else to think about - shhh or patting - it will often help to calm them down. I find myself naturally rocking backwards and forwards myself and try to stop but it's involuntary so I don't always realise I'm doing it! So long as you put them down when they're still awake, I don't think it matters what you're doing to calm them in the first place.
I have used this method when DD was around 6 months but then teething, holidays etc happened and she became a rubbish sleeper again. I have re-introduced it two nights ago. First night it was about 2 hours before she finally slept but yesterday it was reduced to half an hour. However, I ended up lying next to her cot and waiting until she was fully asleep before leaving the room. I had to do that again with my hand on her tummy at 2 am in the morning. those who tried and succeded, do you think this is ok? I am worried that she would make a habit of this (my 4 year old daughter still wakes up some nights and demand that we sleep on the floor next to her bed as we do not allow her to come to our bed!)Any suggestions?
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