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I give up, you just can't win!

(4 Posts)
angel1976 Mon 16-Feb-09 14:24:32

So my MIL has been going on about DS going into his own room since pretty much the day he was born (she put hers in their own room at 2 weeks old hmm). She mentions this at least on every visit we pay to her or she pays to us. He sleeps in his cot in our room as the second bedroom is down two flights of stairs and very cold (sorted by a convector heater!). He turns 1 next week. And we FINALLY moved him into his own room last night and I feel strangely bereaved by the move (didn't feel that way when he went into nursery 4 weeks ago!). I miss hearing the breathing of my LO. The only reason we moved him was because we were waking him up by doing perfectly normal stuff like coming to bed, breathing and turning over!

Anyway, I got this email from my mum today (I come from a culture that co-sleeps a lot and even if not sharing a bed, sharing a room is very normal till a couple of years old):

"I feel that [DS] is too young to be left alone at night. There are cases whereby, babies just hurt themselves by climbing up and down, or playing with switches or doing anything wrong without your knowledge, I personally feel that he needs guidance and care. As a note of caution please seriously look into this matter."

All I can say is hmm and you just CAN'T win!

SnowlightMcKenzie Mon 16-Feb-09 15:18:39

I'm sorry, but LMAO. What are you 14?

Your mother emails you childcare advice?

Please see the funny side and in future don't discuss these things with them unless you truly want their opinion.

Is this the first grandchild on both sides? If so, I urge you to have another soon. Your poor DS is going to have his every move watched and analysed and that kind of pressure is unhealthy for a small child.

angel1976 Mon 16-Feb-09 16:08:51

SnowlightMcKenzie - How did you guess it's the first grandchild on both sides? LOL. I thought my mum's email is pretty funny. She lives overseas and it was in response to an email I sent to her talking about living arrangements when they come visit in April.

I don't discuss ANYTHING with them but my MIL can't help commenting on it when she comes over to visit and DS's cot is still in our room. I agree that I need another one soon... To be fair, because of the scrutiny we come under, I am grateful on two counts a) my parents live overseas b) my MIL doesn't see us too much as she doesn't drive to us due to panic attacks (not grateful that she has panic attacks of course iykwim!). I'm just amazed that people care THAT MUCH about your sleeping arrangements with your child, why does it bother anyone but the people involved???

plj Mon 16-Feb-09 17:57:20

My MIL was excatly the same with my DT's. From the day they turned 6 months, she mentioned it at every visit (weekly visits!Nightmare!) She used to come in and go 'to the loo' straight away, only to come down stairs and demand to know why their moses baskets were still in our bedroom. She even resorted to phoning my sister to complain that she (MIL)had 'paid all that money for 2 cots to sit like ornaments in that room'. I was livid. Had a complete melt down with her, and she never mentioned it again. I only put them in their cots when they were 8 months old.

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