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would i be a bad mother if i wore earplugs?

33 replies

Mimsy2000 · 04/02/2009 20:55

i have a 2.9 son and 3 1/2 month year old son. my toddler usually comes into our bed in the middle of the night. my 3 1/2 month old has a feed before i come to bed and then again around 4am. this in itself is not too bad, but my nights are usually like this:

  • sweaty toddler, occasionally snoring and often times trying to lay on top of me
  • constantly snoring husband
  • grunting 3 1/2 month old baby


would i be terrible to wear earplugs? i am such a light sleeper that everything is waking me up and as far as I can tell, the only time i need to be awake is for the 4am feed. would you?
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Mimsy2000 · 04/02/2009 21:04

errr... is that a yes then!?

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compo · 04/02/2009 21:06

no
you need to sort out toddler so he sleeps in his own bed
is the baby in his own room?
you need to be able to hear him
I'd get snoring dh to the docs asap

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Indiechick · 04/02/2009 21:06

Go for it, I'm going to tonight, ten month old is poorly with a bad cold but she will not sleep, have calpoled her up and she seems to be drifting off, I'm putting them in for a few hours, taking turns with DH. It's the only way. I'm getting so snappy with the lack of sleep.

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bodiddly · 04/02/2009 21:09

does your dh wake up when your little ones cry out? if so, I would ... I have used them since my ds was about 6 months old and can't sleep without them now. I am a really light sleeper. You can still hear anything major just not the snuffles etc.

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RaggedRobin · 04/02/2009 21:10

i had the same problem but moved the snoring partner into a different room as the solution!

to be honest, dd (now 9 months) had a similar sleeping pattern to your baby at that age, but it did change and i'm not sure i would have heard her cries if i had earplugs in, though i did consider them.

as it is, me, dp and baby start off in our room, then ds swaps places with dp in the middle of the night. this means that when i'm woken by dcs in the night, i can usually get back to sleep because i can't hear dp snoring in the next room.

still desperate for more sleep though!!!

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Mimsy2000 · 04/02/2009 21:12

thanks for the replies. not sure hubby will wake for little things but will for the big stuff. his snoring is really starting to drive me mad. i think it's because of a cold we all have and can't shake, but it's just been going on too long....

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onehitwonder · 04/02/2009 21:12

I used earplugs when dd was in her moses basket next to me. It meant I woke when she actually needed feeding, not for every random twitch and snuffle. Lifesaver

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Mummyfor3 · 04/02/2009 21:14

I have used ear plugs - a lot !

It stops you hearing every little snuffle and grunt, and I found I did still hear LO crying. Even in his own room.

So go for it - you need to sleep at some point

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GentleOtter · 04/02/2009 21:18

Another ear plug user here. I still hear ds at night (ok his cot is right beside the bed) but do not hear the sniffs and snorts of ManFlu beside me or the gang of cockerels outside the window. The foamy orange ones are good.

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Gavlaar · 04/02/2009 21:21

I have used ear plugs for so many years now that i can't sleep without them even if i'm totally alone

i wear them and just turn the monitor up so i can hear the bub if he needs me.

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lollipopmother · 04/02/2009 22:37

They'd have to be bloody good earplugs for you not to be able to hear a baby crying that was right next to you! I'd go for it, I did a couple of times when DD was a newborn.

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roselle · 04/02/2009 22:47

I have very funny memories of Dh and I taking our screaming DS into a hardware store and asking where the earplugs were. The staff almost fell over laughing but we were so tired we didn't realise until after how transparent our plans were.
You can still hear the big stuff it just means you have a better chance of getting to sleep and wont wake for the little things which is what you want.

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Mimsy2000 · 05/02/2009 08:45

used the earplugs last night and it was great. didn't hear my hubby snoring, didn't even notice toddler sneaking into our bed. heard baby cry for feed. just like it said on the tin.

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ChocOrange05 · 05/02/2009 09:03

Sounds perfect Mimsy - I used earplugs when DS was in our room from newborn - it blocked out all his little grunts but I could hear when he was whimpering / crying. Sleep is very important and I think we are all happier hence better mothers when we've had it.

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Mimsy2000 · 05/02/2009 09:15

totally agree, chocorange. when mummy's happy everyone's happy :-)

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RaggedRobin · 05/02/2009 10:21

wow... i think you might have changed my mind! it might be dp's passport back into my bed!

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CatIsSleepy · 05/02/2009 10:27

ooh mimsy-what kind of earplugs are they? are they comfy?
i might have to get some if I am ever going to share a room with dh again (he's a big snorer,and i am v. pregnant so have banished him to the sofabed. It's meant to be temporary...)

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notyummy · 05/02/2009 10:48

Another earplus fan here...they may not be sexy but they do the trick!

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Mimsy2000 · 05/02/2009 10:57

earplugs are boots own brand - orange and smooshy

i must confess dh was booted from the bedroom for my entire third trimester. earplugs wouldn't have scratched the surface of my sleeping complaints.

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chocoholic · 05/02/2009 11:02

Another ear plug fan here too. Block out DP snoring but I can alway here DS when he shouts for me (a sixth sense I think!)

After trying lots I use superdrug orange ones. Have a huge stock!!

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chocoholic · 05/02/2009 11:03

Oops, hear not here

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Racers · 05/02/2009 11:19

I'm another one who uses them. You can always adjust them slightly if you're not sure (ie don't squish them all the way in)

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ChocOrange05 · 05/02/2009 14:24

You can also buy earplugs from B&Q and Wickes - they are for people working on building sites but they are much cheaper than boots and other chemists - about £2.50 for 10 pairs orange squishy ones - and they are good at blocking out noise but not painful ones - you can tell I've tried lots!!

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kittywise · 05/02/2009 14:25

God, I wear them, go for it!

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countrylover · 05/02/2009 16:49

I wear them every night and have done for years. DH snores and apart from that, I wake at the tinest sound.

I thought once DS was born I might stop wearing them but I tried it one night and didn't get a wink of sleep.

As long as DS/DD is either next to you or you have the babay monitor turned up full (or even better have one of those breathing monitors) then I see nothing wrong with it.

A mummy who has had some sleep is 100 times better than a mummy with no sleep.

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