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DOES ANYONE JUST GO WITH THE FLOW..?

(23 Posts)
sleepymama Tue 22-Mar-05 10:14:33

Just wondered if anyone doesn't have set sleep/naps times for their lo ? Am a frazzzled new mum who can't get anything done due to lo's irregular nap times and bed times. Also is there anyone who doesn't put their babe to sleep in the crib for nap times and did this affect bedtime routine? I am resorting to putting my 14 week old DS to sleep in his bouncy chair during naps as he doesn't sleep for more than 45 mins anywhere. Is this a bad thing to do ?

hewlettsdaughter Tue 22-Mar-05 10:19:45

Hi, we have no set nap times and dd is 11 months old. Bedtime is now between 6.30 and 7.30 pm but at your ds' age she was probably still awake at that time (I fed her to sleep then carried her up later). Still do feed her to sleep sometimes.
What you're doing is only a bad thing if it's not working for your ds or for you. Does ds sleep if you take him out?

hewlettsdaughter Tue 22-Mar-05 10:20:21

...in his pram/buggy I mean.

sleepymama Tue 22-Mar-05 10:38:55

Yes . He sleeps in car seat and pram but it means that I have to go out for the whole 1 1/2 hours because the minutes the pram stops or car stops hes bawling .

coppertop Tue 22-Mar-05 10:43:17

No set nap times here either. Tbh I'm just relieved if ds2 falls asleep at all.

MarmaladeSun Tue 22-Mar-05 11:34:06

lol @ Coppertop. Same here. I go with the flow; sometimes DD2 will go to sleep at 7, sometimes not until 11pm. Then she wakes often in the night. We co sleep as if she was in her cot I would get NO sleep as opposed to some sleep that I get now. Been like this for 8 months now, and I've adjusted. DD2 is such a happy little thing so something is obviously working.

hermykne Tue 22-Mar-05 11:48:29

beginning to think i should, dd is a routine toddler , ds i am not so sure approaching 8mths and he is gone off it.

beansprout Tue 22-Mar-05 11:53:58

Ds is 5 months (nearly) and while bedtime is ok, day time naps are increasingly difficult. These days he will sleep if in the pram, car etc, but almost impossible to get him to sleep in his cot. While this means he gets a sleep most days, I worry about it. The word "should" features highly in this!

hermykne Tue 22-Mar-05 11:58:03

beansprout and others
i put my ds in his cot, did so from an early age, for his naps and he does sleep in it, sometimes he roars, but my mistake with dd was sleeping in the buggy whilst i lost the weight walking the roadswith her to sleep in the day, when it rained she'd never nap in the cot until anbout 9mths,
he just is a bit erratic, but coming up to the nine months in 1mth and maybe just needs one nap a day now, early rather than later.

sleepymama Tue 22-Mar-05 13:22:51

I have managed to put my lo in cot for last 5 days now for his naps and slowly the morning one has increased to 1 hour over last 2 days. I am really worried as I have appointment tommorrow am and will be out until 3pm - thats 2 naps that will be in the car seat in the car. Should i cancel appt until ds properly settled or should I just see what happens and get my self a LIFE ??!!!!

hermykne Tue 22-Mar-05 13:28:54

oh g*d sleepymama we do dement ourselves, i am thesame , ds had his naps last sat and sunin the car and then yesterday wouldnt sllepp . i said to dh is this becuase he napped in car, is it that direct? i wouldnt cancel, the nap is increasing in the cot so you should be ok

otto Tue 22-Mar-05 13:35:51

The sleep thing is so hard isn't it? I spent much of my maternity leave walking round the park so that ds would get some sleep. I was always knackered of course as he only ever slept in the buggy or the car, never at home. He is much better since I did controlled crying at 7 months, but still won't sleep properly at nursery, so is always overtired by the time I pick him up. I seem to spend much of my life worrying about ds's lack of sleep. I really envy people who have babies that sleep well.

sleepymama Tue 22-Mar-05 13:57:26

Me too ...I am driving myself round the bend stressing about naps and schedules. My DH says he's going to stop me reading books like gina ford and the baby whisperer as he thinks I should just go with the flow. Its driving me to tears as I never know how DS is going to be - bawling or smiling, there no in between!!!!!

laneydaye Tue 22-Mar-05 14:27:57

im not too worried about naps i just let dd sleep whenever/wherever, she still goes to bed at 8.30pm awake and sleeps well just starting to go longer (had 9 hrs last night)

i dont put her in her cot or crib either dont want to confuse her regards bedtime....

basically during the day we go with the flow....

MistressMary Tue 22-Mar-05 14:36:54

I winged it everyday.
Never sleeps in his cot except for bed times.
I used to let him sleep in his car seat in the early days during the day. And now we have a routine, til he changes it for me again!
I follwed Tracey Hogg a little, and that helped with the EASY approach.
It will get easier as time goes on,it's only short term.
Well that's what my other half parroted on about for ages, when I felt the same as you.

ChocCake Tue 22-Mar-05 16:16:09

I am an absolute routine person, so yes, from day 1 I have been setting nap times for my now 25-months-old daughter! She has been sleeping from 7:30pm-8am since 1 year old.
I follow Gina Ford very closely. Perhaps getting one of her books will help?

hermykne Tue 22-Mar-05 16:29:21

sleepymama
today i have let ds go with the flow, his first nap at 11.30 - 1 1/2 hrs, and later on at 4 he was cranky knew he was tired, knew he wont make it til 7pm, so i put him up he cried and now in 2mins i will wake him.
an hopefully he'll still go to bed at 7pm.
and if it works today, and tonight goes ok - my other thread!!- then i will go with the flow.

i used g ford for the routine and do love routine, shes good for the feeds thing but if he s like big sis then he wont do a nap of 2hrs til over 1 yrs old at noon or so...

hope you can get some sense out of that and help

Surfermum Tue 22-Mar-05 16:35:29

I just went with the flow. She would have a feed about 6/7 and go back in her moses basket and the next time she woke up I got up, normally about 10am. From then on she would be in her rocker chair and would just fall asleep as and when it suited her. If I wanted to go out she would sleep in the car seat or the buggy instead. If I wanted to go to the beach she would sleep in her tent. She would always have a bottle at about 10pm and go upstairs then, and I would go to bed too. But if we were out, she would have her bottle in the pub and fall asleep in her car seat.

She went through the night - 10 to 6/7 from 5 weeks and bedtime was gradually brought forward and from about 1 she was going down at 7pm and she'd sleep for 12 or 13 hours without waking.

When she was out of her bouncy chair she would go in her cot for naps, and would have a morning one and an afternoon, and the timing of those would be based on when she showed me signs of being tired (the thumb being a good one!), but if I needed to go out then I would go and she would just fit in.

Oh, and I'd never wake her either.

Probably completely goes against everything GF is about, but it worked for me. It might have been that I got a sleepy one though!

sleepymama Tue 22-Mar-05 16:43:08

I am a routine kind of person but finding my baby is very touchy and grumpy alot. Only thing is I can't stand being indoors all day as I have been for the past 5. I guess I'll just have to go out and see what happens. On another note - to try and get some semblance of a routine DS woke at 5.30 today so i fed him to sleep about 4oz - then woke him again at 7.30 for a feed. Only to be on schedule. Not sure if this is the right thing to do!!! Any ideas cos I feel like I must have this motherhood thing all wrong at the moment.

hermykne Tue 22-Mar-05 17:53:05

sleepymama
i wasa feeding ds at this am time until a week or so ago, i just stopped after he slept from 7-12.30am, and i knew he wasnt hungry,he cried but is gettting over it

laneydaye Tue 22-Mar-05 18:00:06

sleepymama just 2 weeks ago i felt the same, was feeding dd every 2/3 hrs through the night and was so tired i thought i was a crappy mum.... i think if you can do the routine bit its fab.... i just muddle through and im not so stressed thinking about times schedules and routine
dd has since had a couple of 8hr and a 9 hr through the nigh and i feel great....
dont feel under pressure just go with you baby.

sleepymama Tue 22-Mar-05 18:32:53

The thing is I'm only feeding him at 7.30 am to make sure the rest of the day is on schedule and that his bed time will then be 7.30 ish. He went through from 8 - 5.30 am last night so I know I shouldn't complain - but theproblem is the whole day is off track if I then wait from 5.30 am - 9.30 am and four hourly intervals. Cos then his bed tme will be after his 9.30 pm feed... Does that make any sense.......

hermykne Tue 22-Mar-05 20:00:53

sleepymama
when ds woke at 5.30 i literally let him a feed for 3mins and took him off, i could his gulps so i sad right thats enough to quench your hunger til you wake up
would you try that,i wouldnt go four hourly from 5.30 that would put me potty.
you can give him a decent feed at 7/7.30 then and let him wait for it, "mean mommy"
it worked for me

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